The purity myth : how America's obsession with virginity is hurting young women

by Jessica Valenti

Paper Book, 2009

Status

Checked out

Genres

General Nonfiction

Nonfiction

All Topics

Publication

Berkeley, Calif. : Seal Press, c2009.

Description

Sociology. Women's Studies. Nonfiction. HTML:From the bestselling author of Sex Object, a searing investigation into American culture's obsession with virginity, and the argument for creating a future where women and girls are valued for more than sexuality The United States is obsessed with virginity�??from the media to schools to government agencies. In The Purity Myth, Jessica Valenti argues that the country's intense focus on chastity is damaging to young women. Through in-depth cultural and social analysis, Valenti reveals that powerful messaging on both extremes�??ranging from abstinence-only curriculum to "Girls Gone Wild" infomercials�??place a young woman's worth entirely on her sexuality. Morals are therefore linked purely to sexual behavior, rather than values like honesty, kindness, and altruism. Valenti sheds light on the value�??and hypocrisy�??around the notion that girls remain virgins until they're married by putting into context the historical question of purity, modern abstinence-only education, pornography, and public punishments for those who dare to have sex. The Purity Myth presents a revolutionary argument that girls and women are overly valued for their sexuality, as well as solutions for a future without a damaging emphasi… (more)

User reviews

LibraryThing member TadAD

I think that this book can be...largely...summed up with the following quote:

It's time to teach our daughters that their ability to be good people depends upon their being good people, not on whether or not they're sexually active.

In other words, it attacks the notion that females should be defined

by their sexual status and that the only theater where they can operate morally is in the decision about whether or not to have sex outside of marriage.

Regardless of what you may have been told about this book, it is not a polemic in favor of promiscuity...the central issue isn't whether a woman decides to have pre-marital sex or not, it's how society views that decision. A footnote she wrote expresses it best:

For the record, I think virginity is fine, just as I think having sex is fine. I don't really care what women do sexually, and neither should you. In fact, that's the point. I believe that a young woman's decision to have sex, or not, shouldn't impact how she's seen as a moral actor.

The book's topics range from the "the desirable women are young girls" message of our mass media (think Britney Spears or the fastest growing type of plastic surgery...vaginal rejuvenation), through the fetishization of virginity (think Purity Balls), to an examination of the problems with Abstinence Only Education (it's not working). Along the way, it touches soundly on rape, the impossible standard of "manliness" our society endorses, abortion, and the legal situation of women in our country today. In other words, this book is going to push a lot of buttons for some people.

I think that's OK. I think it's fine to challenge people's opinions, to make them step up and understand why they think the way they do. If they can do it...even if only to their own satisfaction...at least people are thinking about things rather than just engaging in some patellar reflex. If they can go a step farther and articulate and defend, we move on to honest discussion and maybe doing something about problems.

I'll be forthright: I agree with much of what was said in this book. If that means you want to stop reading this review right now, I'm OK with that. I am concerned about this virgin/whore thing we've got going in this society—that a woman is either one or the other. Yes, I have opinions about sexuality in young girls, but I also believe that they are much more complex creatures than a hymen—I want my daughters to place serious value on "compassion, kindness, courage, or integrity".

The book is not perfect, in my opinion. It is a little strident and reiterative. Perhaps this is necessary to drive the message home against the societal pressures arrayed against it; I don't know. However, that aspect did feel a bit abrasive at time, like I was being shouted at. And, I think it teeters on the edge a few times: not in intent, but in articulation. For example, I would certainly agree with her position that it would be good if a woman did not have to be cautious if she's had a couple drinks and decides to walk home at night from a bar. However, it think it is naïve to endorse that a woman shouldn't be cautious...it is not a perfect world and there are men out there who rape women. I want to be clear: I don't think she actually takes this position, or others like it, but it did read that way to me at times.

This book would make a phenomenal Book Club read...assuming the members could behave like adults and discuss the issues. It homes in on one of the the most central elements of our culture and asks us to take a clear look at it. That would be much more fun than reading a book where everyone agrees!

Read it; think about it; argue about it, if you wish!

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17 more

LibraryThing member Nickelini

Wow, I don't really know how to talk about this book in a paragraph or so. I read it with a pencil in hand, and my copy is marked up throughout. I could quote huge passages, but I'll restrain myself. Basically, Valenti is trying to rupture our culture's dichotomy that a woman is either "pure" or a

slut, or as she says, "it's time to teach our daughters that their ability to be good people depends on their being good people, not on whether or not they're sexually active."

The most interesting chapters were those on the fetishizing of youth and virginity, and how the porn industry and the purity advocates feed off each other. A little less interesting to me were the chapters on the draconian anti-women laws and practices in the US--though if I lived in the States I'd been incensed. So while this wasn't fully relevant to a non-US resident, there is enough cultural seepage that influences Canadians (and the rest of the western world), that I think this book was an important read. It certainly opened my eyes to some damaging attitudes, and helped me articulate some thoughts I hadn't quite found the words for. Highly recommended.

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LibraryThing member bardsfingertips

Imagine if you will that you are a young, white woman applying for a job. Now, imagine that the person interviewing you asks if you are married. You, as a young, pretty, white woman answers no. The interviewer then mumbles and writes a notation on his paper and asks, to your astonishment, if

whether or not you're still a virgin, and that you must answer honestly. So, you as this young, pretty, white woman answers back to him that you have had in your lifetime two men that you had had sex with. The man mumble some more and tsks slightly louder than a normal person would (or should) and makes more notations. He then tells you that you can have the job. However, you must tell everyone else that you are "a slut" and rather "dirty" and that, unless you reclaim your virginity, you cannot succeed as other young, pretty, white women have in your position.

Of course, the preceding paragraph is an exaggeration. Nevertheless, the evidence (along with the massive amounts of endnotes) would suggest that there is a virginity movement propagated within these here United States that suggest a woman's true worth is within her chastity and her eventual role when married early. Based on the literature that Ms. Valenti has extrapolated from, it seems that this governmentally funded (billions of dollars worth) would be very happy with the above scenario between the young woman and her potential employer. And the author proves beyond a shadow of a doubt that what goes on within these movements for chastity is very Caucasian-centric while other races are believed to be "hyper-sexed" and beyond saving. The virginity movement is also faith-based and tax-free. The virginity movement has influenced states to continue with disingenuous, fear-tactic education about sex. Abstinence-only education is not allowed to mention any form of alternative, safe sex approach a young person can make for him or herself (funny that the people who promote abstinence-only sex are the ones who desire that Intelligent Design be taught as an alternative to Darwinism—talk about freedom of choice!).

Much more is within this truly powerful book. It goes into the details how men make laws for women simply because they, in whole, cannot make correct choices for themselves. Ho even when abortion is legal, a woman must jump through one humiliating hoop after humiliating hoop just to get a pregnancy terminated (and this doesn't matter if the situation is due to rape and/or incest). The book goes into the porn culture and how it is very similar to the virginity culture by making virginity into a fetish (t-shirts proclaiming "I'm tight like Spandex!" being sold on virginity movement websites). It even delves into the sad expectations of machismo that all boys are expected to have (and one, seemingly, can never have enough machismo) by other males.

Overall, The Purity Myth: How America's Obsession with Virginity Is Hurting Young Women, is an excellent book. But, aside from the information that the author gives and references, in the appendixes are lists of resources and websites and magazines that the reader can explore to fight the virginity movement, to feel good about themselves, and most importantly, to know that they should have the freedom to make their own choices and how to obtain such rights.

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LibraryThing member Devil_llama

A good discussion of the movement that promotes virginity and abstinence only sex education. The author quotes extensively from the research and intersperses her own experiences and observations in appropriate ways, without making the book about her. She avoids some of the pitfalls of much feminist

writing, not pushing a narrative of good women-bad men, nor promoting the idea of a goddess matriarchal culture (and in fact mocks same), nor does she push alternative medicine or "feminine" ways of thinking. She includes a few snarky footnotes, so I do recommend reading footnotes, something I often skip. The work is well edited; I did not see punctuation, grammatical, or spelling errors. In addition, she does a good job of being appropriately intersectional, noting the different impact purity culture has on white women and on women of color, without dismissing the very real and devastating impact on white women, and discussing ways in which the culture that turns white women into purity princesses feeds the myths that lead to increased violence toward and discrimination against women of color. In short, she doesn't try to sell one group down the river to help another group, but recognizes the common thread that runs underneath the problem - fear of the feminine. She also discusses porn culture with much more nuance and sense than I often see, and talks about studies done on men, to determine their attitudes and ideas. Overall, a solid book that, sadly, isn't out of date in spite of being ten years old.

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LibraryThing member London_StJ

Jessica Valenti's The Purity Myth examines America's Puritanical views on female purity in an attempt to reveal the negative consequences of an unbalanced and unrealistic sexual culture. Valenti draws on policy, popular culture, and the materials presented by the Conservative movement for virginity

in order to demonstrate the extent to which young people (and the public at large) are outright lied to under the guise of abstinence-only sex education, and presents compelling evidence as to how the push for female virginity and "purity" actually undermines the rights and liberties of young women.

As a whole I found Valenti's book to be enlightening and informative - and sometimes terrifying. While her propensity for snarky footnotes ultimately keeps the text from being what I would consider "academic", The Purity Myth is intended for a large public audience, and Valenti's style of writing adds entertainment value to the information she presents. Given my own negative experiences with self-labeled feminists in academia (for example, a graduate professor recoiling in horror when she discovered I was expecting my first child) I am often hesitant to read "feminist" material. However, I found Valenti to be fairly even-keel, and many of her ideals match my own (equality of the sexes vs. "men are evil"). As with any politically involved author, it is obvious that Valenti has a specific agenda and that she is writing to that agenda, but I do not believe her conviction works to the detriment of the text. I cannot remember which of my fellow LibraryThingers recommended the book, but I am grateful that it was brought to my attention and would certainly recommend it.

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LibraryThing member melodyaw

Summary

Jessica Valenti argues in The Purity Myth that the United States is obsessed with virginity. She asserts that those associated with the abstinence movement are perpetuating the virgin/whore dichotomy, which sets up only two kinds of women: one to be admired and emulated and the other to be

disgraced and shunned. Valenti opposes the idea that a sexually active woman is “tainted” or “impure” and thereby unworthy, and she protests against the movement’s emphasis on chastity, marriage, and parenthood.

She comments, “In this mess of chastity expectations, objectification, and control of women, we have lost a very fundamental truth: Sex is amazing, and there’s nothing wrong or dirty or shameful or sinful about it.”

In particular, she takes to task:

The abstinence teacher who tells her students that they’ll go to jail if they have premarital sex. The well-funded organization that tells girls on college campuses that they should be looking for a husband, not taking women’s studies classes. The judge who rules against a rape survivor because she didn’t meet whatever standard for a victim he had in mind. The legislator who pushes a bill to limit young women’s access to abortion because he doesn’t think they are smart enough to make their own decisions. These are the people who are making the world a worse place—and a more dangerous one, at that—for girls and women.

Analysis

If you already believe that the abstinence movement is harming young women, you will like this book. If you don’t, you’re not likely to change your mind.

There were many parts of this book that I enjoyed. However, I came to it hoping for a clear-eyed, well-argued account of the effects of the movement toward abstinence and virginity. I wanted to recommend the book to my friends who remain on the fence about the issues that Valenti discusses.

This book instead only reinforces the dichotomy between supporters and detractors of abstinence. Much of her prose reads like, well, a pugilistic and snarky blog entry, dominated by her strong opinions. She openly derides those who support the virginity movement, and suggests that her side is the only one to see the finer nuances of the point:

“[F]or those who buy into the virginity movement, the only alternative to being a virgin is being a whore. There’s no in-between for them; there are no shades of gray when it comes to sexuality. . .”

Rather than seeking to build a bridge to the other side, Valenti sets up a fort on her side of the chasm.

That being said, there were many points made in the book that bear repeating.

Valenti begins by exploring how society has put youth on a pedestal. The increasing sexualization of young girls, she explains, cuts both ways—childlike innocence is valued in women of all ages. She observes, “Young women are being trained to be not autonomous adults, but perpetual children whose sexuality is strictly defined and owned, like that of traditional wives-in-training.”

One of the more powerful chapters of the book is devoted to abstinence-only education. More than just teaching children to say “no,” Valenti writes, “abstinence-only curricula . . . are built on outdated notions of gender norms and sexist stereotypes about sexuality and relationships, and ultimately seek a return to traditional gender norms.” Valenti argues that the abstinence movement is not supported very broadly within U.S. society, despite the federal funding it receives. She supports her statements with solid research:

According to a study published in Pediatrics & Adolescent Medicine, 82 percent of Americans support programs that teach contraception as well as abstinence, and half of all Americans oppose abstinence-only education altogether. Even among those who describe themselves as conservatives, 70 percent support comprehensive sex education.

Valenti’s professional experience includes working at the National Organization for Women’s legal defense fund, and she has a good handle on legislative issues. Valenti proposes that men—still predominant in politics and policymaking—are making the laws about women’s bodies, seeking legislation ranging from blocking minors’ access to the over-the-counter “morning after” pill, to requiring the father’s note of approval before a woman can have an abortion, to requesting that women report miscarriages within 12 hours for fear of facing murder charges. In Valenti’s opinion, a push toward laws such as these signifies that women aren’t trusted to make their own decisions.

Valenti cites disturbing cases of violence against women, such as that of a young woman who was drinking late at a bar and was kidnapped, tortured, raped, murdered, and dumped beside the road. Another appalling case involved a woman in the Air Force who was raped and, when she reported the crime, was charged with “indecent acts”—essentially being punished for her own rape. In cases such as these, women are often criticized for making poor decisions when they “know better,” but Valenti takes umbrage at the blatant victim-blaming attitude of the media and authorities by stating unequivocally, “Women do not get raped because they weren’t careful enough. Women get raped because someone raped them.”

While I appreciate her in-depth criticism of violence against women (and how it is handled in the media), the mention of violence against men was virtually nil. The only time she even mentions the rape of men is while criticizing an Axe body spray advertisement featuring women harassing and sexually assaulting the men who use Axe. In interpreting the ad as solely making “light of actual violence against women,” Valenti herself trivializes very real sexual violence against men.

The author does touch upon the often-overlooked issue of hypermasculinity, though. She comments:

As much as the virginity movement is based upon the idea that a woman’s worth is dependent upon her sexuality, it’s also mired in the belief that traditional masculinity is superior and its preservation is necessary.

Valenti discusses the harmful effects of masculine ideals upon both men and women; men are supposed to be strong, insensitive, and, above all, NOT womanlike. Not only does this ideology create inequality between the sexes, but it also humiliates men who reveal a sensitive or passive personality, often questioning their sexuality and “manliness” and therefore their very worth.

Which brings me to another one of Valenti’s points: queer sexuality is completely overlooked in an abstinence movement that “seeks to create a world where everyone is straight, women are relegated to the home, the only appropriate family is a nuclear one, reproductive choices are negated, and the only sex people have is for procreation.” I’m not surprised; many of the conservative and often religious forces behind the abstinence movement are also anti-gay.

While Valenti has some interesting comments to make about the abstinence movement and its effects upon women’s empowerment, her points are occasionally weakened by her bias. However, I did enjoy many parts of the book, and I would recommend it to anyone with an interest in the abstinence movement and feminism.

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LibraryThing member PoliticalMediaReview

Though you might not know it judging from the tenor of “post-feminist” discourse, young women’s positive conceptions of themselves and their futures are the result of the first- to third-wave feminist movements. Such is the blessing and curse of many a successful campaign — gains are so

positive, people can take them and the organizing, fearlessness and sacrifice that got us here for granted.

Conservative religious and political forces were handed defeats during this period, as modern capital adjusted to economic demands brought on by globalization, not to mention internal and external labor shifts. However, such defeats have not meant these factions have changed their message. The gloss may be different. The phrasing may be retouched. Women’s place in such a lexicon stays the same.

In The Purity Myth: How America’s Obsession With Virginity is Hurting Young Women, author Jessica Valenti explores an ideology punishing women for sex.

Control of women through gendered forms of victimization is well documented. Susan Faludi’s 1992 book, Backlash, is perhaps the best known contemporary text addressing many of these topics. Blaming women for social ills because of their perceived violations of traditional social mores is nothing new, but connotations of such in the Internet age, where messages about young women’s corruptibility spread quickly, have the power to be tremendously damaging. Such victimization, in the end, is often intended to reshape women’s vision of themselves as fully informed and functioning participants in civil society.

The Purity Myth painfully illustrates how the dirty wars against women are robustly fought around matters of female sexuality. Women’s activism in reclaiming their humanity, and efforts by other women to derail feminist actions rather the actions of a sexist society, are also on display here. Valenti’s contributions in deconstructing the advent of online media are also noteworthy; though there is a good criticism online of “men’s” websites (including at Valenti’s own Feministing blog), seeing it in print is valuable. Readers of works like Germaine Greer’s The Female Eunuch or Betty Friedan’s The Feminine Mystique will find Valenti’s findings to be tragically familiar, though incredibly relevant for new generations to comprehend.

Many sexist posits, as Faludi noted in her book, have acutely racist or white supremacist undertones. Guarding young (white) women from the savage (Third) world is intimated at many turns. The racialized nature of such arguments needs to be more comprehensively investigated, as many women of color have pointed out of works by white feminists, which will get read far more than writings of women of color. Still, there are many valuable insights on race and gender’s intersectionality to take away from The Purity Myth. Just not enough.

No stranger to pseudoscience, the Right has made a cottage industry out of abstinence-only culture. The purveyors of chastity seem not above making a buck off absurd and frankly creepy schemes, from attempted debunking of condom reliability to hymen reconstruction plastic surgeries to purity merchandise and balls, the latter being prom-style events in which young women promise in the presence of their fathers to hold their virginity until marriage. Female sexuality is commoditized to a variety of purposes, from political to financial, and Valenti writes passionately not only about the surreal nature of these issues, but also how profoundly young women are impacted by such cynical ploys.

Blaming women for what befalls them, as many feminist scholars and Valenti write, is much simpler to do than to hold men, society and patriarchy accountable. Thus, it is far simpler to pin a woman’s worth on her sexuality than it is to see women as fully realized human beings with complex needs and agendas that are outside the bounds of some individuals’ range of acceptability. At points, The Purity Myth only further muddles complex topics, such as pornography, but at different moments, cognizance of the most difficult cases herein could be no more poignant.

Reviewed by Ernesto Aguila

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LibraryThing member Pretear

Witty and insightful, Valenti makes a powerful and convincing argument for why the paternalistic concepts of purity and virginity hurt women and girls.

LibraryThing member ASKelmore

From my Cannonball Read V review, which was posted onto Pajiba!

This is a nearly impossible review to write, as this book is amazing, infuriating, and endlessly quotable. I like to write in my books (I know, the horror), underlining passages, commenting on paragraphs, dropping the occasional “the

FUCK” in the margins, and fiendishly circling page numbers so I know which ones REALLY need to be remembered. In the case of this book, nearly every page has at least one passage underlined. And I was being conservative with my pen.

Jessica Valenti is a feminist who has spent much of her life spreading the (shockingly controversial) idea that women deserve social, political and economic equality. This doesn’t just mean that she supports the basics like, say, equal pay for equal work; it means she explores the real issues that affect women on a regular basis. She examines the systemic issues, the roots of discriminatory treatment, and makes connections that initially seem obtuse but, given her thorough research and excellent ability to connect the dots, become clear and obvious to anyone willing to think critically.

I read her book Full Frontal Feminism this fall, and plan to read Why Have Kids at some point this year. But this book has caused my blood pressure to rise so much that I think I need a palate cleanser to clear my mind of the absurdity of the anti-feminist movement.

As the subtitle of The Purity Myth suggests, Valenti’s book explores “how America’s obsession with virginity is hurting young women.” The overall thesis can be summed up pretty well with this quote:

“For the record: I think virginity is fine, just as I think having sex is fine. I don’t really care what women do sexually, and neither should you. In fact, that’s the point. I believe that a young woman’s decision to have sex, or not, shouldn’t impact how she’s seen as a moral actor.”

There is so much good in this book that I clearly won’t be able to do it justice. But I’m going to try to point out some of the things that make it so great. Valenti doesn’t (as some of her more ignorant critics claim) propose women go out and have a lot of sex. She doesn’t propose that women not have sex, either. Instead, she chooses to frame the discussion around why women are judged based on *not* having sex, while men are judged on other things. As she puts it in the first paragraph: “It’s time to teach our daughters that their ability to be good people depends on their being good people, not on whether or not they’re sexually active.”

Anyone who has attended high school in America can probably almost immediately bring to mind the image of a classmate who was a ‘slut,’ and, as such, not a ‘good’ person. I find it embarrassing to think back to how sexual activity was used as a proxy for determining the (negative) value of an entire human. It wasn’t always the case; not having had sex (at least at my high school) didn’t peg someone as good or bad, but there were definitely some people who were talked about.

Valenti focuses on all the different ways this idea of purity hurts women of all ages. Many of you are probably familiar with the Madonna / Whore dichotomy (possibly thanks to a scene from Sex and the City featuring Charlotte talking to Trey about her sexual needs); Valenti looks at the way it is reinforced on a regular basis through all sorts of different venues, and how that hurts all women. And if you think about it, it makes perfect sense: if my value is tied up in whether or not I still have an intact hymen, that implicitly means that nothing else I do matters. If all that I am good for is staying ‘pure’ for my future husband then there’s no need for me to access any other opportunities, like, say, a solid education or a career.

The first chapter in the book – and the one that disturbed the heck out of me – focuses on Purity Balls and virginity worship. These FEDERALLY FUNDED displays of paternal ownership reek of creepy incestuous relationships, but operate under the guise of helping young women to ‘save’ themselves, with their fathers promising to protect their virtue. Again, as though a girl’s virtue can be found between her legs and not in her brain.

From here, Valenti discusses many more related topics in fascinating and disgusting detail, including: the dangers of abstinence-only education; the racial and economic implications of the fact that some women are already seen as ‘spoiled’ by virtue of the way they look or the community in which they live; the misinformation spread by anti-feminist organizations; the way that purity is sexualized, contributing directly to the objectification of young women; and myriad other interconnected topics. From an exploration of how society has decided only certain women can be raped, to how this traditional understanding of purity leaves out many people from the get go (where do lesbians fit in, for example?), Valenti hits each topic directly, using straightforward language backed up by solid research and a whole lot of facts.

Some of the best writing is in the area of sexual assault. I dare you to read chapter five without either throwing the book at a wall or at least going to the liquor cabinet for a stiff drink because it is BLEAK.

But it is so important. I plan to gift this book (along with Full Frontal Feminism) to my nieces and nephews when they are old enough, because the information is important, and it isn’t just up to women to change these bizarre notions of a woman’s worth. While some readers may have tuned out at my first mention of feminism, consider picking it up – whether you are a woman or a man, this book will open your eyes and hopefully motivate you to action.

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LibraryThing member RavenNight

"The lie of virginity - the idea that such a thing even exists - is ensuring that young women's perception of themselves is inextricable from their bodies, and that their ability to be moral actors is absolutely dependent on their sexuality."

"'Virgin' is a designation for those who meet a certain

standard of what women, especially younger women, are supposed to look like. As for how these young women are supposed to act? A blank state is best."

When picking up this book, I wasn't really sure what to expect. It sounded like something that I would be interested in, but I wasn't really sure. I am very glad that I read it, though. It says some very important things that I believe more people need to hear.

It does not shame anyone for their personal choices and beliefs. The book merely contests the viewpoints of abstinence based sexual education and explains why it harms people's perspectives on themselves and harms our society as a whole. Overall, it was very respectful of the fact that many people have their own beliefs and makes a wonderful argument for why other people should too.

I found this book interesting, informative, and very important. While I already believed in many of the things Valenti assesses, it opened my eyes to many new things going on in America that I did not know of before. It offers up the viewpoint that whether you wait until marriage or don't, it doesn't really matter because it's your body and your choice. I think this is something most people should read to better understand how abstinence only education is harming youth and to gain a newfound respect for themselves and others.

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LibraryThing member shulera1

As much as I enjoy Valenti's voice and style, I think I was the wrong audience for this book. Reading it was fun and quick, but it didn't really tell me anything I didn't already know. I think this is a book for people just starting to look into how our obsession with virginity affects young women,

not for those who have already studied the subject fairly extensively.

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LibraryThing member Sullywriter

Disturbing and fascinating.

LibraryThing member sparemethecensor

Nothing revolutionary here, but it is guaranteed to trigger your righteous feminist outrage. The chapters on the lies in abstinence-only education textbooks and pharmacy conscience clauses were especially difficult for me to read -- my blood pressure must have raised substantially for both.

LibraryThing member marthaearly

Jessica Valenti is a clear and educated Feminist who does her research and is one of my favorite Feminist writers for the contemporary woman looking to understand how social and cultural standards and expectations can hurt women to this day. Valenti gives me hope that we can all recognize and make

change in our lives to better the lives of all women, young and old.

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LibraryThing member contadine

Good content was not enough to overcome poor writing and horrible organization.

LibraryThing member Citizenjoyce

This is a terrific book. Valenti starts right off in the introduction saying: Girls "going wild" aren't damaging a generation of women, the myth of sexual purity is. The lie of virginity - the idea that such a thing even exists - is ensuring that young women's perception of themselves is

inextricable from their bodies, and that their ability to be moral actors is absolutely dependent on their sexuality. It's time to teach our daughters that the ability to be good people depends on their being good people, not on whether or not they're sexually active. This is such an important book, especially right now with all the craziness about reproductive rights. She discusses rape, the weird incestuous vibe of purity balls with young girls pledging their purity to their fathers, myths about purity, and the need to trust women to make their own decisions. It's a pretty short easy read too, in fact I was surprised and disappointed when it ended. But then there's a great section listing resources for women and women's blogs. Because of the resource section this is a book that should be owned not just taken out from the library.

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LibraryThing member schatzi

I've read Valenti's "Full Frontal Feminism" and "He's a Stud, She's a Slut," both of which are geared towards younger readers. "The Purity Myth" came highly recommended to me, but it is written more for adults, and the book is highly readable and thought-provoking. I found that I enjoyed this book

far more than the other two (if "enjoyed" is the right word; the inequalities detailed in the book are somewhat rage-inducing).

Valenti takes a long hard look at the purity pushers in American, and the effect that they're having in our society. And if you think it's just purity balls or abstinence-only sex education programs, you're wrong. Valenti ties the obsession with virginity to rape, abortion, laws against women, and a host of other ills that American women face.

Intriguing and infuriating, I'd recommend this book to anyone.

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LibraryThing member Netherto

Outstanding. Who would have thought that a church-based movement would elevate "purity" and "virginity" above basic ethical behavior (lies, theft, violence)?

Fewer