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A widely acclaimed young writer's fierce new novel, in which childbirth and new motherhood are as high stakes a proving ground as any combat zone. A year has passed since Ari gave birth to Walker, though it went so badly awry she has trouble calling it "birth" to begin with and she still can't locate herself in her own altered universe. Amid the strange, disjointed rhythms of her days and nights and another impending winter in upstate New York, Ari is a tree without roots, struggling to keep her branches aloft. When Mina, a one-time cult musician-older, self-contained, alone, and nine months pregnant-moves to town, Ari sees the possibility of a new friend, despite her unfortunate habit of generally mistrusting women. Soon they become comrades in arms, and the previously hostile terrain seems almost navigable. With piercing insight, purifying anger, and outrageous humor, Elisa Albert issues a wake-up call to a culture that turns its new mothers into exiles and expects them to act like natives. Like Lionel Shriver's We Need to Talk about Kevin and Anne Enright's The Gathering, this is a daring and resonant novel from one of our most visceral writers.… (more)
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The narrative is almost a stream of consciousness with Ari's unfiltered thoughts raging across each page. Ari is brutally honest about her experience, but abrasively so. She is angry, bitter and self pitying, however it's fair to say that she is
" Sometimes I’m with the baby and I think: you’re my heart and my soul, and I would die for you. Other times I think: tiny moron, leave me the f**k alone..."
It seems likely Ari is experiencing some level of post natal depression, exacerbated by a birth she viewed as traumatic and her difficult relationship with her deceased mother. Motherhood is undoubtedly a huge period of change and adjustment.
"There's before and there's after. To live in your body before is one thing. To live in your body after is another. Some deal by attempting to micromanage; some go crazy; some zone right the hell on out. Or all of the above. A blessed few resist any of these..."
There were parts of the novel I connected with, I have four children (three of whom were born in three years) so I can relate somewhat to Ari's experience. New motherhood can be a frustrating, exhausting, frightening and isolating period.
"Endless need. I did not understand how there could be no break. No rest. There was just no end to it. It went on and one and on. There was no end. And I couldn't relinquish him....because he was mine. There was an agony that bordered on physical when he wasn't in my arms."
However I had a hard time dredging up a lot of sustained sympathy for Ari who wallows in negativity. She is so angry, and self-righteous and entitled. I found her rants about c-sections and bottle-feeding particularly off putting.
"The baby's first birthday. Surgery day, I point out, because I have trouble calling it birth. Anniversary of the great failure."
For all of the rage in After Birth, Albert raises some important issues about the experience of modern motherhood. It can be such an isolating experience for many women, especially for those who lack the close support of family and friends and it is often difficult for new mother's to admit, and ask, for help.
"Two hundred years ago-hell, one hundred years ago- you'd have a child surrounded by other women: your mother, her mother, sisters, cousins, sisters -in-law, mother-in-law.... They'd help you, keep you company, show you how. Then you'd do the same. Not just people to share in the work of raising children, but people to share in the loving of children."
Albert also speaks about friendship, and the way women relate to each other in both positive and negative ways. Ari has few female friends, and her closest friends essentially abandon her after her son is born. She latches onto to Mina, the pregnant tenant of friends, who offers her much of the validation she craves.
We set up camp at my house or hers. We listen to music. I like the music she likes...."We say 'yes', 'exactly', 'poor thing' and 'I know', 'I know that's the whole problem' and 'really, well of course!'"
I think the rage in this novel has the potential to both ameliorate and alienate women, I rolled my eyes in derision of what it had to say as often as I nodded my head in agreement. I didn't enjoy After Birth, nor even really like it, but it is a thought provoking and powerful read.
WOW. If you have not given birth, read this. If you have given birth, read this. If you are a human of this place and time, read this. If
The writing is blisteringly sad, funny, and inappropriate. Here's an example: "He's an awesome baby, a swell little guy. Still a baby, though, of which even the best are oppressive fascist bastard dictator narcissists." So, if you appreciate the fine qualities of that line, read this book. I'm buying it, which is my tribute, and I'm heading for Elisa Albert's back catalogue as fast as my fingers will carry me.
"Sometimes I’m with the baby and I think: you’re my heart and my soul, and I would die for you. Other times I think: tiny moron, leave me the f$#k alone so I can slit my wrists in the bath and die in peace.”
“The baby toddles over, hides behind my legs. He’s an awesome baby, a swell little guy. Still a baby, though, of which even the best are oppressive fascist bastard dictator narcissists.”
See what I mean? Elisa Albert doesn't hold any punches, and I'm appreciative of that. The only reason I don't give this 5 stars is that the second half of the book kind of meandered a bit for my liking. Overall, though, a great, great read.
"Sometimes I’m with the baby and I think: you’re my heart and my soul, and I would die for you. Other times I think: tiny moron, leave me the f$#k alone so I can slit my wrists in the bath and die in peace.”
“The baby toddles over, hides behind my legs. He’s an awesome baby, a swell little guy. Still a baby, though, of which even the best are oppressive fascist bastard dictator narcissists.”
See what I mean? Elisa Albert doesn't hold any punches, and I'm appreciative of that. The only reason I don't give this 5 stars is that the second half of the book kind of meandered a bit for my liking. Overall, though, a great, great read.
I think some of the themes presented were also really interesting. The author did a really great job of
One thing that was especially interesting to me, as a married woman without a child, was how the narrator viewed motherhood as such a lonely, isolating thing. Like, she had a baby, and suddenly found herself very alone. That was interesting to me personally, as I'm in a somewhat opposite position -- no baby while close friends and family are all having babies, which is somewhat isolating in its own way.
While some of the narrator's views were a bit heavy handed and over the top, I'm guessing that was somewhat intentional...and it really highlighted the way mothers can be so judgmental towards other mothers and the decisions they make. Despite not ever having endured pregnancy or childbirth, this was a really interesting read for me.
A new mother is trying to find a balance, the new child and family.
Story of a woman who's not found her zen after giving birth. Lives in a college town and works at the co op where they sell fresh vegetables.
She feels out of sorts and friends the neighbors who turn her
Relationships she has with other females and talk about Jewish religion.
I received this book from National Library Service for my BARD (Braille Audio Reading Device).
The book is a little hard to read, as we are reading it like ambling thoughts that come into your brain and there is a lot of that. But isn't that how we all are? Just sometimes hard to follow.