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Business. New Age. Self-Improvement. Nonfiction. HTML:The #1 New York Times bestseller. 1 million copies sold! From thought leader Dr. Brené Brown, a transformative new vision for the way we lead, love, work, parent, and educate that teaches us the power of vulnerability. "It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; . . . who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly."—Theodore Roosevelt Every day we experience the uncertainty, risks, and emotional exposure that define what it means to be vulnerable or to dare greatly. Based on twelve years of pioneering research, Dr. Brené Brown dispels the cultural myth that vulnerability is weakness and argues that it is, in truth, our most accurate measure of courage. Brown explains how vulnerability is both the core of difficult emotions like fear, grief, and disappointment, and the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, empathy, innovation, and creativity. She writes: "When we shut ourselves off from vulnerability, we distance ourselves from the experiences that bring purpose and meaning to our lives." Daring Greatly is not about winning or losing. It's about courage. In a world where "never enough" dominates and feeling afraid has become second nature, vulnerability is subversive. Uncomfortable. It's even a little dangerous at times. And, without question, putting ourselves out there means there's a far greater risk of getting criticized or feeling hurt. But when we step back and examine our lives, we will find that nothing is as uncomfortable, dangerous, and hurtful as standing on the outside of our lives looking in and wondering what it would be like if we had the courage to step into the arena—whether it's a new relationship, an important meeting, the creative process, or a difficult family conversation. Daring Greatly is a practice and a powerful new vision for letting ourselves be seen.… (more)
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Since Brown refers to her TED talk in the book, I was excited to watch it (fan of TEDTalks) but wanted to read her book first.
I am - I think - one of the kinds of readers that she refers to in the book that is skeptical that a topic on vulnerability or shame is worth reading an entire book about. Consider me reformed. She makes a strong case for considering vulnerability. One lightbulb went off when she explained how so many of us cite joyful moments as vulnerable ones. She has other helpful insights that I'm planning to use in unexpected ways. I'll be using some of the early chapters in her book in my university classes on peer mentoring.
I think I would have been uncomfortable with the book if it read too much like a self-help book. It doesn't. It is helpful, I have dog-eared tons of pages, but there is intriguing and substantive research to inform her writing.
The thing that I like the best is that she shares her vulnerability in her writing and she writes like a real person... helps that she seems so smart too.
The chapters on education, work and parenting are noteworthy because her viewpoints, through the lens of the importance of vulnerability, are refreshingly less proactive than we're used to seeing. I believe her take on parenting is exceptionally insightful.
Being earnestly and healthily vulnerable depends on giving up a great deal of control, and that can be a frightening thing. The brave and daring among us are not without their moments of being afraid. And for those in the arena, fear is a constant companion.
I think you’re either a person that reads self-help books and gets something out of them or you’re not. I usually do not. I fully admit that I’m not a very introspective person and I’m sure that’s why. It’s definitely not because I think I’m perfect or anything. I remember feeling left out in college when my friends were “finding themselves” and having deep conversations about the meaning of life. I told my mom about it and she said, “Well, not everyone can sit around analyzing themselves all day or nothing would ever get done.” Hmm…wonder where I get it from?
The theme of Daring Greatly is that we should dare to be vulnerable and that there is a difference between shame and guilt. Shame is bad and guilt is not. Also, there is a difference between being vulnerable and just vomiting up your problems to anyone who will listen. Your vulnerability has to have appropriate boundaries.
I don’t disagree with anything Brown is saying, I’m just not sure how to put it to use in my real life. To me, being vulnerable is being open about your insecurities. But how do you express that without sounding like a whiner? I need concrete examples. I looked up my review of Eckhart Tolle’s A New Earth, another self-helpish book I’ve read and that’s the same thing I said about that book!
Daring Greatly did lead to a really good discussion in my book club – one of the best we’ve had. I think that’s because we are all pretty close friends and we were able to be vulnerable with each other while discussing this book. I’m not sure it would as good of a discussion if the book club members were just acquaintances.
I know there are tons of people who worship Brené Brown, a lot of my friends included. I can see why but at the same time, I don’t see myself reading any more of her books.
This latest book, "Daring Greatly", has helped me see the benefits of extending that a bit further to dare to be vulnerable and thereby free ourselves and others even more.
Brene's work is inspiring--even more so because she, herself, walks that road with us.
Would I start with this book? Probably not. I'd start with her earlier books first, but this is the next step.
And this from a person who writes little critical comments about all the books she reads.
And is constantly dismayed with the State of the World.
A reminder to self: Spend more time in the arena and less in the stands.
In her latest book, [Daring Greatly], Brown provides a nice balance of insights from her research and from her own life. The title comes from one of my favorite quotes from Theodore Roosevelt:
“The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again. . . who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly. . .”
Many of her insights about how our culture sends messages that we are “never enough” and about the defenses we put up to avoid being vulnerable had me nodding my head in agreement. For each of her examples, I could think of one of my own. I especially enjoyed the chapters on how we can combat shame and encourage vulnerability at work, in schools, and in our own families. Her wholehearted parenting manifesto should be distributed to all new parents. It starts like this:
“Above all else, I want you to know that you are loved and loveable.
You will learn this from my words and actions – the lessons on love are in how I treat you and how I treat myself.
I want you to engage with the world from a place of worthiness.
You will learn that you are worthy of love, belonging, and joy every time you see me practice self-compassion and embrace my own imperfections.
We will practice courage in our family by showing up, letting ourselves be seen, and honoring vulnerability. We will share our stories of struggle and strength. There will always be room in our home for both.”
There’s more, but hopefully that gives you a sense of Brown’s nonjudgmental advice on parenting.
I’m not sure that this book is the best introduction to Brown’s work. I recommend [The Gifts of Imperfection] for that. But for those of us who want more insight into how to apply Brown’s insights on vulnerability across multiple roles, [Daring Greatly] is a welcome follow-up.
“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong
Every day we experience the uncertainty, risks, and emotional exposure that define what it means to be vulnerable, or to dare greatly. Whether the arena is a new relationship, an important meeting, our creative process, or a difficult family conversation, we must find the courage to walk into vulnerability and engage with our whole hearts.
In Daring Greatly, Dr. Brown challenges everything we think we know about vulnerability. Based on twelve years of research, she argues that vulnerability is not weakness, but rather our clearest path to courage, engagement, and meaningful connection. The book that Dr. Brown’s many fans have been waiting for, Daring Greatly will spark a new spirit of truth—and trust—in our organizations, families, schools, and communities.
If we've heard all this before, we've never heard it detailed and described in this manner. I particularly like her take on how a scarcity mentality contributes to the unwillingness to be vulnerable. Beyond self-help, this book provides useful research, insight and inspiration for anyone who wants to change their world.
The Teddy Roosevelt quote that inspired the book's title is now one of my favorite quotes. I'll admit I wasn't familiar with it until reading this book.
I'm certainly looking forward to reading the author's other works and viewing her TED talks.
An interesting, somewhat informative read. While I sort of innately knew many of the things the author says, it is refreshing to hear/read someone else say them. As someone who can relate to many of the “not-so-good” feelings described, it is heartening to
I had been raised by a Wholehearted mother and it reinforces so much of what she taught me growing up. I couldn't put it into words for so long what made her so amazing and why people flocked to her and how she changed the room when she walked into it, but I do now. She is simply wholehearted, even when she's failing. She dares greatly every day, she always has. This book has given me a way to understand her and all the things she's done. It's given me that little bit more of a guide on how to help get to where she is. Maybe I'll get there, maybe I won't. But I'll dare greatly and hopefully I can pass that on to my son as well.
Everyone should read this book and review it every time we feel like we're "not enough".
When I saw the title of this book, I wanted to read it because I wanted to "strengthen" myself internally for my future move. I am moving back to the town where I used to live, where I have some very good friends but where I will also see people I rather not see or interact with
The book has nothing to do with that at all and am I glad!
The book is based on the following saying by Theodore Roosevelt, part of a speech he gave at the Suorbonne in Paris, France, on April 23, 1910. The following passage made his speech famous and I typed it directly from the book (p. 1):
“It is not the critic who counts: not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done better.
The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again,
because there is no effort without error or shortcoming, but who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, who spends himself for a worthy cause;
who, at the best, knows, in the end, the triumph of high achievement, and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly….” (emphasis added)
The book reminded me that there is nothing wrong with taking chances, making mistakes, and learning, re-learning, and trying again and again and again. There is nothing wrong with being vulnerable and that it takes a lot of courage to live life with imperfections and be opened to others’ criticisms.
As adults, we encourage children and young people in learning new things, making mistakes, taking chances and trying again. Why not as adults too? So I have decided to live my life by daring greatly, whatever may come, mistakes and all.
It is going to be a pretty great life.