Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulberable Transforms the Way We Love, Parent & Lead

by Brene Brown

Paperback, 2015

Status

Available

Publication

Penguin (2015), Edition: Reprint, 320 pages

Description

Business. New Age. Self-Improvement. Nonfiction. HTML:The #1 New York Times bestseller. 1 million copies sold! From thought leader Dr. Brené Brown, a transformative new vision for the way we lead, love, work, parent, and educate that teaches us the power of vulnerability. "It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; . . . who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly."—Theodore Roosevelt Every day we experience the uncertainty, risks, and emotional exposure that define what it means to be vulnerable or to dare greatly. Based on twelve years of pioneering research, Dr. Brené Brown dispels the cultural myth that vulnerability is weakness and argues that it is, in truth, our most accurate measure of courage. Brown explains how vulnerability is both the core of difficult emotions like fear, grief, and disappointment, and the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, empathy, innovation, and creativity. She writes: "When we shut ourselves off from vulnerability, we distance ourselves from the experiences that bring purpose and meaning to our lives." Daring Greatly is not about winning or losing. It's about courage. In a world where "never enough" dominates and feeling afraid has become second nature, vulnerability is subversive. Uncomfortable. It's even a little dangerous at times. And, without question, putting ourselves out there means there's a far greater risk of getting criticized or feeling hurt. But when we step back and examine our lives, we will find that nothing is as uncomfortable, dangerous, and hurtful as standing on the outside of our lives looking in and wondering what it would be like if we had the courage to step into the arena—whether it's a new relationship, an important meeting, the creative process, or a difficult family conversation. Daring Greatly is a practice and a powerful new vision for letting ourselves be seen.… (more)

Rating

(568 ratings; 4)

Media reviews

Wall Street Journal
At times her [Brown's] suggestions sound like the satirical affirmations of the Stuart Smalley character from TV's Saturday Night Live: "I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, people like me." But she also offers good insights into how people don personal armor to shield themselves from
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vulnerability.
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User reviews

LibraryThing member JenBurge
Rarely do I give a book 5 stars, but for me, this book was nothing less than transformative. Brene Brown comes across as a regular, flawed person who has found her way out of the dark with a great deal of effort. For her to be able to deliver this information on how she did it and we can too in a
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funny, uplifting manner is an incredible accomplishment. If you have never struggled with vulnerability, then you are very lucky- but this book might not be for you. If you a person that struggles every day to believe you are good enough, despite your many achievements, I cannot recommend this book enough. Diving deeper into what the underlying causes of that "not got enough" feeling are was illuminating for me. Now that I understand it, I too can muster the courage to Dare Greatly. I am immensely grateful for this book and for Brown's bravery in writing it.
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LibraryThing member trisarahdactyl
In this book, Brené Brown speaks on the importance of vulnerability in our everyday lives. I was certainly expecting the book to be interesting, but I wasn't expecting to be blown away in the way that I was. If I could recommend that everybody read this book, I would. It's an engaging read that
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makes you view your own life and choices in a new light. The observations she makes about our culture as a whole and about us as individuals is revealing and insightful. Brown also writes in a way that is very accessible to the general public and includes very little (if any) technical jargon. An excellent book that I'm sure I'll re-read at least several times!
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LibraryThing member bookcaterpillar
Received this book from Early Reviewers and read the introduction, wasn't moved enough to read further, and just picked it back up over the weekend. After reading into the first two chapters I wondered aloud to my husband why I didn't devour the book when I first picked it up. Read the entire book
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so quickly the second time around!
Since Brown refers to her TED talk in the book, I was excited to watch it (fan of TEDTalks) but wanted to read her book first.
I am - I think - one of the kinds of readers that she refers to in the book that is skeptical that a topic on vulnerability or shame is worth reading an entire book about. Consider me reformed. She makes a strong case for considering vulnerability. One lightbulb went off when she explained how so many of us cite joyful moments as vulnerable ones. She has other helpful insights that I'm planning to use in unexpected ways. I'll be using some of the early chapters in her book in my university classes on peer mentoring.
I think I would have been uncomfortable with the book if it read too much like a self-help book. It doesn't. It is helpful, I have dog-eared tons of pages, but there is intriguing and substantive research to inform her writing.
The thing that I like the best is that she shares her vulnerability in her writing and she writes like a real person... helps that she seems so smart too.
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LibraryThing member Spoerk
It's hard to do things. Very hard. And for me, I'd rather put everything off until it somehow fixes itself. So this book hit very close to home. Arrow to my heart. But it's what I needed. In fact, because of this book, I got a new job. I took that jump and left a job that I grew to hate and found a
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new one that I love. I dared to dare greatly and I will continue to do so.
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LibraryThing member Daniel.Estes
The strength of Daring Greatly by Brené Brown lies in understanding what it means to be intentionally vulnerable. Most of us see vulnerability as a negative quality, and indeed it can be as we learn from examples on shame throughout the book, but Brown argues for a healthy and necessary
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alternative, one I would describe as optimistic vulnerability. None of us go it alone, she argues, and it is because of our interdependency that real courage will always be needed, in work, in life, anything.

The chapters on education, work and parenting are noteworthy because her viewpoints, through the lens of the importance of vulnerability, are refreshingly less proactive than we're used to seeing. I believe her take on parenting is exceptionally insightful.

Being earnestly and healthily vulnerable depends on giving up a great deal of control, and that can be a frightening thing. The brave and daring among us are not without their moments of being afraid. And for those in the arena, fear is a constant companion.
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LibraryThing member mcelhra
Daring Greatly is not about winning or losing. It’s about courage. In a world where “never enough” dominates and feeling afraid has become second nature, vulnerability is subversive. Uncomfortable. It’s even a little dangerous at times. And, without question, putting ourselves out there
Show More
means there’s a far greater risk of getting criticized or feeling hurt. But when we step back and examine our lives, we will find that nothing is as uncomfortable, dangerous, and hurtful as standing on the outside of our lives looking in and wondering what it would be like if we had the courage to step into the arena—whether it’s a new relationship, an important meeting, the creative process, or a difficult family conversation. Daring Greatly is a practice and a powerful new vision for letting ourselves be seen.

I think you’re either a person that reads self-help books and gets something out of them or you’re not. I usually do not. I fully admit that I’m not a very introspective person and I’m sure that’s why. It’s definitely not because I think I’m perfect or anything. I remember feeling left out in college when my friends were “finding themselves” and having deep conversations about the meaning of life. I told my mom about it and she said, “Well, not everyone can sit around analyzing themselves all day or nothing would ever get done.” Hmm…wonder where I get it from?

The theme of Daring Greatly is that we should dare to be vulnerable and that there is a difference between shame and guilt. Shame is bad and guilt is not. Also, there is a difference between being vulnerable and just vomiting up your problems to anyone who will listen. Your vulnerability has to have appropriate boundaries.

I don’t disagree with anything Brown is saying, I’m just not sure how to put it to use in my real life. To me, being vulnerable is being open about your insecurities. But how do you express that without sounding like a whiner? I need concrete examples. I looked up my review of Eckhart Tolle’s A New Earth, another self-helpish book I’ve read and that’s the same thing I said about that book!

Daring Greatly did lead to a really good discussion in my book club – one of the best we’ve had. I think that’s because we are all pretty close friends and we were able to be vulnerable with each other while discussing this book. I’m not sure it would as good of a discussion if the book club members were just acquaintances.

I know there are tons of people who worship Brené Brown, a lot of my friends included. I can see why but at the same time, I don’t see myself reading any more of her books.
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LibraryThing member smallwonder56
Brene Brown has done it again--taken our relationship with shame, fear and vulnerability one step farther. I've loved and struggled with Brene's other books because I grew up in a family profoundly into shame as a means of controlling children. Brene's books have helped me challenge and question
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the times that mt family's programming automatically took over in my life.

This latest book, "Daring Greatly", has helped me see the benefits of extending that a bit further to dare to be vulnerable and thereby free ourselves and others even more.

Brene's work is inspiring--even more so because she, herself, walks that road with us.

Would I start with this book? Probably not. I'd start with her earlier books first, but this is the next step.
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LibraryThing member debnance
A new favorite quote, from Theodore Roosevelt: "It's not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the person who is in the arena. Whose face is marred with dust and sweat and blood;
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who strives valiantly ... who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly ..."

And this from a person who writes little critical comments about all the books she reads.

And is constantly dismayed with the State of the World.

A reminder to self: Spend more time in the arena and less in the stands.
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LibraryThing member staciec
I was interested in this book after watching Brene Brown's TED talks on vulnerability and shame. It's one thing to talk about "being yourself" or "leaning into the discomfort" but it's a much more difficult thing to tackle how to do that and why, which is what she tackles in this book. It is an
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engaging, interesting read, but more than that, it made me realize what areas in my life need changing, and it gave me some pointers on where to start the process.
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LibraryThing member porch_reader
I loved Brene Brown’s previous book, The Gifts of Imperfection. In it (and in her highly popular TED talks), she describes how her research on shame and vulnerability has helped her understand that embracing vulnerability can be the key to wholehearted living. To achieve this goal, you have to
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cultivate a sense of worthiness and let go of shame and fear.

In her latest book, [Daring Greatly], Brown provides a nice balance of insights from her research and from her own life. The title comes from one of my favorite quotes from Theodore Roosevelt:

“The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again. . . who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly. . .”

Many of her insights about how our culture sends messages that we are “never enough” and about the defenses we put up to avoid being vulnerable had me nodding my head in agreement. For each of her examples, I could think of one of my own. I especially enjoyed the chapters on how we can combat shame and encourage vulnerability at work, in schools, and in our own families. Her wholehearted parenting manifesto should be distributed to all new parents. It starts like this:

“Above all else, I want you to know that you are loved and loveable.

You will learn this from my words and actions – the lessons on love are in how I treat you and how I treat myself.

I want you to engage with the world from a place of worthiness.
You will learn that you are worthy of love, belonging, and joy every time you see me practice self-compassion and embrace my own imperfections.

We will practice courage in our family by showing up, letting ourselves be seen, and honoring vulnerability. We will share our stories of struggle and strength. There will always be room in our home for both.”

There’s more, but hopefully that gives you a sense of Brown’s nonjudgmental advice on parenting.

I’m not sure that this book is the best introduction to Brown’s work. I recommend [The Gifts of Imperfection] for that. But for those of us who want more insight into how to apply Brown’s insights on vulnerability across multiple roles, [Daring Greatly] is a welcome follow-up.
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LibraryThing member Becky221
Only read about one half the book -- it seemed entirely common sense to me. The "cultural norms" and definitions of femininity and masculinity she applies are very restrictive and not my experience at all. Maybe living in a progressive state helps!
LibraryThing member jerrikobly
Researcher and thought leader Dr. Brené Brown offers a powerful new vision that encourages us to dare greatly: to embrace vulnerability and imperfection, to live wholeheartedly, and to courageously engage in our lives.

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong
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man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; . . . who at best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly.” —Theodore Roosevelt

Every day we experience the uncertainty, risks, and emotional exposure that define what it means to be vulnerable, or to dare greatly. Whether the arena is a new relationship, an important meeting, our creative process, or a difficult family conversation, we must find the courage to walk into vulnerability and engage with our whole hearts.

In Daring Greatly, Dr. Brown challenges everything we think we know about vulnerability. Based on twelve years of research, she argues that vulnerability is not weakness, but rather our clearest path to courage, engagement, and meaningful connection. The book that Dr. Brown’s many fans have been waiting for, Daring Greatly will spark a new spirit of truth—and trust—in our organizations, families, schools, and communities.
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LibraryThing member ann.elizabeth
Brene Brown, a social worker and TED conference speaker, praises the transformative power of vulnerability. Citing psychological and sociological studies, she demonstrates that living "wholeheartedly" (truly open to criticism, our own fallibility, and the discomfort of others' vulnerability)
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creates better families and organizations. Convincing and engaging.
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LibraryThing member buildalife
Shame. Blame. Vulnerability. Perfectionism. If any of these words resonate with you, this book will make an impact. Daring Greatly by Brene Brown examines how and why we numb ourselves to feeling--both the good and the bad. In it's scholarly yet easily accessible tone, this book makes a perfect
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compliment to two of my other favorites: The Happiness Project by Gretchin Rubin and Quiet by Susan Cain. I've not yet read Brown's first book, Gifts of Imperfection, but have now added it to my list.
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LibraryThing member sstaheli
Warning: reading this book will change your life, so approach with caution! We live in a society that values achievement without showing any leniency for failure. Dr. Brown's book caused a radical shift in my perspective on vulnerability and the power it contains. Without risk, there can be no
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meaningful progress, no great triumph, no real success, but that requires sacrificing safety. With a title taken from one of the most brilliant things TR ever said, Dr. Brown truly delivers a book that leaves a powerful and lasting impression.
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LibraryThing member jpsnow
This is one of those books that come along every so often to fill a gap in the genre. Brown's main point is that people can't truly reach their potential, in performance, in experiences, and in relationships, without making themselves vulnerable. Instead though, we learn at a young age to develop
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armors like perfectionism, numbing, and cynicism. I like the way her book is backed by real research and life experience. I like the way her applications are balanced across business, personal, and family scenarios. It would be a rare person for whom this book doesn't provoke some amount of new self-awareness.
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LibraryThing member marasgma
A colleague posted a quote from Brene Brown; another colleague heard her speak at a conference; and a third male colleague I thought was beyond learning from anyone said her thinking on vulnerability changed his life. Then her picture appeared on Facebook; then a link to a TED talk. Who is Brene
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Brown and why are people so excited about her? And then this book came in the mail from Library Thing Early Reviewers....and I understood the enthusiasm. Her message is timely, clearly stated, delightfully written, and strikes at the fears in all of us.
If we've heard all this before, we've never heard it detailed and described in this manner. I particularly like her take on how a scarcity mentality contributes to the unwillingness to be vulnerable. Beyond self-help, this book provides useful research, insight and inspiration for anyone who wants to change their world.
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LibraryThing member bclplyr
This book truly resonated with me. I picked it up on a whim from the library and was immediately sucked in. It gave me new ways to think about vulnerability, shame, courage, and risk. I appreciate that the book is founded on academic research undertaken by the author. I flew through the book and
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now want to go through it again in order to really absorb all it has to offer.

The Teddy Roosevelt quote that inspired the book's title is now one of my favorite quotes. I'll admit I wasn't familiar with it until reading this book.

I'm certainly looking forward to reading the author's other works and viewing her TED talks.
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LibraryThing member kedicat
Review Daring Greatly by Brene Brown

An interesting, somewhat informative read. While I sort of innately knew many of the things the author says, it is refreshing to hear/read someone else say them. As someone who can relate to many of the “not-so-good” feelings described, it is heartening to
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see these feelings acknowledged and not shamed in this society.
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LibraryThing member she_climber
Fantastic book says I who doesn't really like self-help books and rarely, if ever, have actually ever finished one. But this one is so relatable and well-written with just the right about of humor that I enjoyed it immensely. It also could not have come at a better time in my life when I was on the
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verge of chickening out or daring greatly and with Ms. Brown's help. I went for it and it was not not as painful as I imagined. I still didn't succeed in the typical sense of the word, but I showed up and sometimes that counts as a victory.
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LibraryThing member Calavari
There are simply not enough good things that I can say about this book. It can be hard to put into practice the principles outline to be Wholehearted, but it's worth the trial. Ever since seeing Brown's TEDtalks a few years ago, I have loved her work and looked forward to reading this book. Getting
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away from "not enough" and embracing vulnerability are really hard to do, and she stresses that it is a practice and not perfection.
I had been raised by a Wholehearted mother and it reinforces so much of what she taught me growing up. I couldn't put it into words for so long what made her so amazing and why people flocked to her and how she changed the room when she walked into it, but I do now. She is simply wholehearted, even when she's failing. She dares greatly every day, she always has. This book has given me a way to understand her and all the things she's done. It's given me that little bit more of a guide on how to help get to where she is. Maybe I'll get there, maybe I won't. But I'll dare greatly and hopefully I can pass that on to my son as well.

Everyone should read this book and review it every time we feel like we're "not enough".
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LibraryThing member Oceanwings07
This was a fascinating book about daring to step out of your comfort zones and being something greater. I found it particularly poignant as I started a new venture in my life and had to push past where I was comfortable. A great and informative read.
LibraryThing member Ocean_Mist
** spoiler alert **

When I saw the title of this book, I wanted to read it because I wanted to "strengthen" myself internally for my future move. I am moving back to the town where I used to live, where I have some very good friends but where I will also see people I rather not see or interact with
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again. I wanted the book to give me ideas on how to "take it" when I am teased again or given a hard time or whatever, for moving and coming back (which I have done more than once), mistakes made (or not) and so on.

The book has nothing to do with that at all and am I glad!

The book is based on the following saying by Theodore Roosevelt, part of a speech he gave at the Suorbonne in Paris, France, on April 23, 1910. The following passage made his speech famous and I typed it directly from the book (p. 1):

“It is not the critic who counts: not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done better.

The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again,

because there is no effort without error or shortcoming, but who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, who spends himself for a worthy cause;

who, at the best, knows, in the end, the triumph of high achievement, and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly….” (emphasis added)

The book reminded me that there is nothing wrong with taking chances, making mistakes, and learning, re-learning, and trying again and again and again. There is nothing wrong with being vulnerable and that it takes a lot of courage to live life with imperfections and be opened to others’ criticisms.

As adults, we encourage children and young people in learning new things, making mistakes, taking chances and trying again. Why not as adults too? So I have decided to live my life by daring greatly, whatever may come, mistakes and all.

It is going to be a pretty great life.
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LibraryThing member BethieBear
Great insights on vulnerability, authenticity and bravery (showing up).
LibraryThing member StefanieGeeks
I do believe that this book can change your life and make our little burdens a little easier to cope with. The book for me was an affirmation of how I try to live on a daily basis. It gave me permission to dare greatly, share my real thoughts with others, and make a fool of myself trying to live
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well with others (and forgive myself later). I highly recommend it, especially for the sections on organizational philosophy and parenting.
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Awards

Language

Original language

English

Original publication date

2012

Physical description

8 inches

ISBN

1592408419 / 9781592408412

UPC

884799384790
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