Status
Available
Call number
Genres
Publication
St. Martin's Press (2008), Edition: First Edition, 256 pages
Description
The author of "Running with Scissors" delves into new territory with his most personal and unexpected memoir yet. "A Wolf at the Table" is the story of Burroughs' relationship with his father, his stunning psychological cruelty, and the redemptive power of hope.
User reviews
LibraryThing member yourotherleft
Augusten Burroughs' father never loved him. Apparently, not even one little bit. As a child, Augusten's enthusiastic greetings were stalled by his fathers ever-interfering Arms. When young Augusten decides to keep a "scientific" tally of how many times his father says "not now" or "go away" versus
If I were to give in to my first impression, I would have to say that, above all, this book is depressing. Probably the most depressing thing I've read all year, maybe the most depressing thing I've read in a few years. As the book moved into its second hundred pages I was reading it with the trepidation of the easily scared watching a horror movie (Oh nooo, don't leave the guinea pig behind with him! Don't ask to get an ice cream cone! Don't put those cookies in the shopping cart - it can only end badly!). After reading this book, there is surely no doubt in my mind that Burroughs' father was totally unhinged and reprehensible in nearly every way.
So, that's my initial reaction. This book is too depressing to be enjoyed. Why would any happiness seeking human being ever want to read something so utterly dispiriting?
On second look, though, it occurred to me that, whenever I could seperate myself from the unfortunate happenings inherent in this book, Augusten Burroughs is really a great writer. Despite its more depressing properties, I never once thought that I wanted to lay this book down and not finish it. From the very start, this book has a touch of brilliance. Burroughs brings to life his early childhood memories in a perfectly clear and surreal manner in which those memories tend to linger. They're filled with smells, textures, in almost photographic glimpses in which memories from such a young age seem to manifest themselves. Burroughs puts into words the essence of his childish enthusiasm for loving his father and the crushing and shameful disappointment he felt when he realized his advances never seemed to penetrate his father's, at best, indifference toward him. He pinpoints the exact moments when he began to understand, and in some measure accept, the most difficult truths about his father. He captures that tension between desperately wanting to be loved and fiercely hating the same person he can't help hoping will love him unconditionally. He insightfully contemplates what a father should be and whether he did or did not turn out to posess the worst qualities of his own father.
Now that I think about it, it may be because Burroughs' writing is so skillful that this book is so hard to read. We see and feel exactly what Burroughs intends for us to see and feel through his narrative. We come to know the youngster Burroughs was, to understand his deepest desires and to be just as disappointed, angry, and fearful as he once was. A Wolf at the Table is a painful, difficult read, but it is also a sort of cathartic masterwork of a very talented writer.
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how many times he says "come here," the results are so overwhelmingly negative that Augusten is ashamed to say he even tried to measure such a thing. Not only was his father astonishingly unloving, he was also, as Augusten realized not too far into his young life, remarkably unlovable. Father had a sadistic streak that made simple things like owning pets or asking to get an ice cream cone exercises in terror. One after the other Burroughs chronicles his most horrific memories of a father who was profoundly disturbed and wonders if he will grow up to be like the monster that struck terror into anyone who could see past the surprisingly normal face he projected to the outside world.If I were to give in to my first impression, I would have to say that, above all, this book is depressing. Probably the most depressing thing I've read all year, maybe the most depressing thing I've read in a few years. As the book moved into its second hundred pages I was reading it with the trepidation of the easily scared watching a horror movie (Oh nooo, don't leave the guinea pig behind with him! Don't ask to get an ice cream cone! Don't put those cookies in the shopping cart - it can only end badly!). After reading this book, there is surely no doubt in my mind that Burroughs' father was totally unhinged and reprehensible in nearly every way.
So, that's my initial reaction. This book is too depressing to be enjoyed. Why would any happiness seeking human being ever want to read something so utterly dispiriting?
On second look, though, it occurred to me that, whenever I could seperate myself from the unfortunate happenings inherent in this book, Augusten Burroughs is really a great writer. Despite its more depressing properties, I never once thought that I wanted to lay this book down and not finish it. From the very start, this book has a touch of brilliance. Burroughs brings to life his early childhood memories in a perfectly clear and surreal manner in which those memories tend to linger. They're filled with smells, textures, in almost photographic glimpses in which memories from such a young age seem to manifest themselves. Burroughs puts into words the essence of his childish enthusiasm for loving his father and the crushing and shameful disappointment he felt when he realized his advances never seemed to penetrate his father's, at best, indifference toward him. He pinpoints the exact moments when he began to understand, and in some measure accept, the most difficult truths about his father. He captures that tension between desperately wanting to be loved and fiercely hating the same person he can't help hoping will love him unconditionally. He insightfully contemplates what a father should be and whether he did or did not turn out to posess the worst qualities of his own father.
Now that I think about it, it may be because Burroughs' writing is so skillful that this book is so hard to read. We see and feel exactly what Burroughs intends for us to see and feel through his narrative. We come to know the youngster Burroughs was, to understand his deepest desires and to be just as disappointed, angry, and fearful as he once was. A Wolf at the Table is a painful, difficult read, but it is also a sort of cathartic masterwork of a very talented writer.
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LibraryThing member bakersfieldbarbara
As in his other books, Burroughs leaves the reader in awe of how much a child in abusive situations can tolerate, and live to tell it in an honest and penetrating way. I, too, suffered psychological abuse but not to this degree, and would never be able to describe it in such a way that Burroughs is
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able to do. Terrifying relationships are described, and the reader will feel a part of this pain as it is told, and yet wonder at what point Burroughs might have escaped. And to whom, or to which part of his environment? All very good reading, and absolute important for everyone to read this to see what is really happening in some families. Abuse still goes on, and children still are not properly protected, and would never know how to get out of such a family environment. This heightens awareness, thankfully. Show Less
LibraryThing member coolmama
Another brilliant tale of his highly dysfunctional family by Augusten. This poor guy's mother was nuts, and now we find out in the "prequel" to Running with Scissors that his drunk father, a professor at Amherst was emotionally abusive to his son (but had a different relationship with his older
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son) . Amazing that Augusten survived his crazy family life and became such a functional human being. Show Less
LibraryThing member mgaulding
The character of the father is truly a monster....what an amazing story Burrough continues to tell in his memoirs. Every bit as astonishing as Running With Scissors.
LibraryThing member PghDragonMan
Augusten Burroughs latest addition to his continuing memoir is the second most disturbing I’ve read. Nothing can top the scenes portrayed in Running with Scissors, but A Wolf at the Table, is certainly disturbing. This book presents a personal look at Augusten’s rocky and strained relationship
We are brought into Burroughs life prior to the time frame of Running with Scissors, skip that section of his life, jump to the fairly recent past and end with the father’s death. I’m not going to play amateur psychiatrist, but after reading the memories of the time frame covered by this book, you can start to understand why the author’s life has taken the path it did. You also wonder why the rest of the family did not abandon the father long before they did. This man is almost evil intent personified.
Another facet of the memoir was Augusten’s brother, John Elder. John Elder alternately takes on a menacing role and at other times, an almost protective role. In one scene we learn that John Elder tried to bury Augusten, head first, in a hole he had dug. In a much later scene this same brother takes Augusten out to teach him how to shoot a rifle so Augusten can protect himself and his mother from their father.
Augusten Burroughs’ writing style makes you feel you are eavesdropping on the action, almost as if you were an invisible observer. This realism adds to the tension of the described scenes. At times, it is hard to keep reading, yet I found myself driven to find out just how he survived.
While this is hardly a book for casual reading, you owe it to yourself to read this one if you are a fan of Burroughs’ writing. Soul wrenching in a different way from Running with Scissors, A Wolf at the Table is a good addition to your bookshelf of memoirs or psychological case studies.
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with his father, John. In addition to giving us more background into his mother’s role in his life, we also learn some about his brother, John Elder.We are brought into Burroughs life prior to the time frame of Running with Scissors, skip that section of his life, jump to the fairly recent past and end with the father’s death. I’m not going to play amateur psychiatrist, but after reading the memories of the time frame covered by this book, you can start to understand why the author’s life has taken the path it did. You also wonder why the rest of the family did not abandon the father long before they did. This man is almost evil intent personified.
Another facet of the memoir was Augusten’s brother, John Elder. John Elder alternately takes on a menacing role and at other times, an almost protective role. In one scene we learn that John Elder tried to bury Augusten, head first, in a hole he had dug. In a much later scene this same brother takes Augusten out to teach him how to shoot a rifle so Augusten can protect himself and his mother from their father.
Augusten Burroughs’ writing style makes you feel you are eavesdropping on the action, almost as if you were an invisible observer. This realism adds to the tension of the described scenes. At times, it is hard to keep reading, yet I found myself driven to find out just how he survived.
While this is hardly a book for casual reading, you owe it to yourself to read this one if you are a fan of Burroughs’ writing. Soul wrenching in a different way from Running with Scissors, A Wolf at the Table is a good addition to your bookshelf of memoirs or psychological case studies.
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LibraryThing member brakketh
Enjoyed this book in places though not as much as some of his previous work. As always an easy and enjoyable read though I think I found the child like stories a little dull after a while. Burrough's construction of the character of his father was definitely the high point of the novel for me.
LibraryThing member jenniferthomp75
Although I'm usually a fan of Burroughs' work, this book left me with a bad feeling. His memoir about his father and, specifically, how awful his father was as a human being, wasn't very interesting. The entire time I was reading the book, all I could think was "what is he trying to do with this
The book just felt like one big "woe is me." Not recommended.
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book?" Is he trying to make the reader feel sorry for him? Is he trying to get the reader to agree with him about how awful his father was?The book just felt like one big "woe is me." Not recommended.
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LibraryThing member agirlandherbooks
Absent is the humor of Burroughs's previous books; this is a harrowing, damning tale of the cold, vicious man who was his father. That he survived is a testimony to his enduring spirit. Difficult to read.
LibraryThing member jayde1599
Synopsis: Another memoir by the author, this time focusing on his early childhood relationship with his father. The only thing Augusten craves from his father is attention and love. He only gets a cold, hatred of a response back. Augusten knows that there is something wrong with his alcoholic
This is another memoir where the reader is left thinking where was DHHS and how could these people have children? The author is insightful, and appears to be grounded despite what he went through growing up. I liked this book better than Possible Side Effects and I still need to read Running with Scissors. It was interesting to see how his interpretation of their life differs from his older brother's view in Look Me in the Eyes, which I read last year.
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father, and not just the chilling smile that his father gives him late at night. As Augusten grows older, his relationship with his father gets scarier and more distant.This is another memoir where the reader is left thinking where was DHHS and how could these people have children? The author is insightful, and appears to be grounded despite what he went through growing up. I liked this book better than Possible Side Effects and I still need to read Running with Scissors. It was interesting to see how his interpretation of their life differs from his older brother's view in Look Me in the Eyes, which I read last year.
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LibraryThing member meditatinglibrarian
I listened to the audiobook of this, which was quite an experience. Burroughs reads his own painful and amazingly well-written and insightful book about his father and Augusten's relationship (mainly not) with him. He uses a few sound effects and several songs written by current singer/songwriters
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after reading the book to add to the listening experience. An interesting and engaging production; also disturbing and painful in places. Show Less
LibraryThing member shmuffin
A dark twisted recount of a disturbed childhood with a sociopath father who refuses to show interest or affection in his youngest son. It's a moving story that is horrifying to imagine being real. A must read that will cause any father to pick up sons or daughters and kiss them over and over.
LibraryThing member Carlie
I know of Augusten Burroughs through the film adaptation of his memoir, Running with Scissors. Having seen the film, it is unlikely that I will read the book. So when I saw that he had written another memoir, it stirred my interest. A Wolf at the Table is about his life as a child living with this
Burroughs' father was an alcoholic prone to violent outbursts and later to psychotic episodes. Despite this terror, Burroughs' craved his father's attention and love. One of the most compelling elements of this abuse is the devastation he feels due to the selfish disinterest and inattention of his father. He relates instance after instance in which he tries to illicit a positive emotional response from his father, and each time he is turned away. While more loving and available, his mother nevertheless was distant and preoccupied.
Burroughs' writing is understated yet poignant. It evoked emotion not because of the tragedy of the story but through the portrayal of the world through a fearful and confused child's eyes. The thoughts that run through a little boy's mind when faced with the turmoil of abuse and psychological disorder roused empathy and stirred rage. In the end he did not, as he feared, become like his father, yet he has still not fully recovered from the terror and neglect.
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parents and his brother. If one wonders how a teenager comes to live with his mother's batty therapist and his kooky family, it becomes abundantly clear in this intimate and gripping recollection of an abuse-ridden childhood.Burroughs' father was an alcoholic prone to violent outbursts and later to psychotic episodes. Despite this terror, Burroughs' craved his father's attention and love. One of the most compelling elements of this abuse is the devastation he feels due to the selfish disinterest and inattention of his father. He relates instance after instance in which he tries to illicit a positive emotional response from his father, and each time he is turned away. While more loving and available, his mother nevertheless was distant and preoccupied.
Burroughs' writing is understated yet poignant. It evoked emotion not because of the tragedy of the story but through the portrayal of the world through a fearful and confused child's eyes. The thoughts that run through a little boy's mind when faced with the turmoil of abuse and psychological disorder roused empathy and stirred rage. In the end he did not, as he feared, become like his father, yet he has still not fully recovered from the terror and neglect.
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LibraryThing member Ardwick
Collection of essays about Augusten's childhood and later interactions with his father. Augusten is upbeat about his experiences, but they seem horrific.
LibraryThing member nbmars
This memoir of horrendous mental abuse by psychotic parents has much to recommend it if you can stomach the constant emotional pain inflicted on that child. At a minimum, one could say his mother was suicidal and his father was an alcoholic. But there was more: the ongoing threat of violence
Burrough’s ability to remember some events of his childhood so vividly, and to have blocked out others rings true, and is mesmerizing in its selectivity.
His longing for his father’s love was so palpable that as a child he stuffed a spare set of his father’s clothing and hugged it at night to get to sleep. He began to wish for his father’s death almost as passionately as he wished for his love. His mother pointed out to him the curious anomaly that he pronounced “Dad” as “Dead.” And yet he himself is determined to survive. He writes:
“I knew I had an ugly life. I knew I was lonely and I was scared. I thought something might be wrong with my father, wrong in the worst possible way. I believed he might contain a pathology of the mind – an emptiness – a knocking hollow where his soul should have been. But I also knew that one day, I would grow up. One day, I would be twenty, or thirty, or forty, even fifty and sixty and seventy and eighty and maybe even one hundred years old. And all those years were mine, they belonged to nobody but me. So even if I was unhappy now, it could all change tomorrow. … Maybe, I thought, I don’t need a father to be happy. Maybe, what you get from a father you can get somewhere else, from somebody else, later. Or maybe you can just work around what’s missing, build the house of your life over the hole that is there and always will be.”
Burroughs is a poetic writer; one wishes he were not damaged and could apply his talent to a more uplifting tale.
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clinging to the house like a bad odor; a stench of fear; at the best of times neglect, at the worst, verbal violence; and perhaps, something else – the part the author does not, cannot remember.Burrough’s ability to remember some events of his childhood so vividly, and to have blocked out others rings true, and is mesmerizing in its selectivity.
His longing for his father’s love was so palpable that as a child he stuffed a spare set of his father’s clothing and hugged it at night to get to sleep. He began to wish for his father’s death almost as passionately as he wished for his love. His mother pointed out to him the curious anomaly that he pronounced “Dad” as “Dead.” And yet he himself is determined to survive. He writes:
“I knew I had an ugly life. I knew I was lonely and I was scared. I thought something might be wrong with my father, wrong in the worst possible way. I believed he might contain a pathology of the mind – an emptiness – a knocking hollow where his soul should have been. But I also knew that one day, I would grow up. One day, I would be twenty, or thirty, or forty, even fifty and sixty and seventy and eighty and maybe even one hundred years old. And all those years were mine, they belonged to nobody but me. So even if I was unhappy now, it could all change tomorrow. … Maybe, I thought, I don’t need a father to be happy. Maybe, what you get from a father you can get somewhere else, from somebody else, later. Or maybe you can just work around what’s missing, build the house of your life over the hole that is there and always will be.”
Burroughs is a poetic writer; one wishes he were not damaged and could apply his talent to a more uplifting tale.
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LibraryThing member bleached
A sad memoir of a boy suffering from the rejection of his father. Then mental abuse this boy faces is a terrible tragedy that no child should suffer through. As it ruins his family he is forced to watch his world around him burn and ignore him.
LibraryThing member hickmanmc
Summary from Follett--"Presents a memoir of Augusten Burroughs' relationship with his father, which consisted of abuse, aloofness and betrayal."Intense book, but doesn't come across as disturbing as Running With Scissors. It is a good portrayal of how a child can be abused even when it is not
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physically. The emotional toll on Augusten of having a father who never showed him any love and terrified his mother and Augusten is devastating. Would be a great book to discuss in a psychology/sociology class. Show Less
LibraryThing member Pretear
Augusten Burroughs wasn't hugged enough as a child - it makes for an irritating read. Skip this one.
LibraryThing member kelawrence
This was a good book . . . HOWEVER, if you are a first-time reader of Burroughs, I would not suggest it as the one to start with. Try DRY or RUNNING WITH SCISSORS first. It will give you an insight as to who Burroughs is and his background; then try this book. It's good and revealing of the author,
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but very dark (probably theraputic for him), but to be honest, if I had started with this book, I wouldn't have read any others. Don't make that mistake - he's too bright of an author to be dismissed. Give POSSIBLE SIDE EFFECTS a spin first. Show Less
LibraryThing member ilive2read
I found this one of the saddest books I've ever read. It is as well written and as compelling as his other books. My caution is - if you have any issues with your father that are unresolved have a therapist on call while you read! I finished reading it one evening and found myself sobbing and
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unable to get to sleep for a long time. Show Less
LibraryThing member littleton_pace
Having studied Augusten's Running With Scissors in a class, I grabbed this book from my local book shop when I saw it. It's centred more on his younger years and delivers quite a heartbreaking insight to his lonely life. He was such a confused, lonely child who never received his right to a stable
My copy has a picture of an 8-10 year old Augusten on it, and there is so much sadness in his eyes its crazy. To read his story and to know exactly why that sadness is there make it that much more of a memorable read.
Rec'd!
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and happy home, definitely something that I personally can now see that I could take for granted.My copy has a picture of an 8-10 year old Augusten on it, and there is so much sadness in his eyes its crazy. To read his story and to know exactly why that sadness is there make it that much more of a memorable read.
Rec'd!
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LibraryThing member HelenGress
The book starts with a disturbing scene, “If my father caught me he would cut my neck…” The book describes a childhood- with looming distances of abuse and neglect separating the members of a highly dysfunctional family. The author is the brother of another author. (Look Me in the Eye)
LibraryThing member AliceAlways
couldn't get past the first few pages. will perhaps pick up at another time.
LibraryThing member TimBazzett
Reading Augusten Burroughs could become habit-forming. A WOLF AT THE TABLE is the second of his books I've read this week. This one is certainly much darker than RUNNING WITH SCISSORS, largely without the hilarity and humor that marked that book. It's easy to see why when one begins to understand
There is little here about Burroughs later life and his gay assignations and relationships - a conscious decision on the author's part, I'm sure. Because this book was meant to be all about his father - his dark silent drinking, his sudden inexplicable rages, his occasional brutality and violence toward his wife and sons. But mostly I think Burroughs was simply trying to figure it all out, perhaps to expiate the demons and understand the recurring nightmares that haunted him for decades after he left home. Judging from the structure of the book, it seems he wrote most of the book while his father was still living, but waited to finish and published it only after his father's death.
This is a sad story, perhaps even a tragic one. But I think it's a better one that RwS, written with an intense and yearning honesty, resulting I think in a kind of redemptive self-discovery for Burroughs. The last couple of chapters dealing with his father's demise and its aftermath are wrenching enough to break your heart. I hope this book did rid Burroughs of his doubts, demons and nightmares. No one deserves a childhood like the one he endured.
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the tragedy of the relationship - or lack of one - between Burroughs and his father, John Robison, who was an alcoholic and dangerously depressed and disturbed. And yet his father was able to function for many years as a philosophy prof at UM-Amherst, where he wore "a mask" of normality, as Burroughs came to understand many years later. There is little here about Burroughs later life and his gay assignations and relationships - a conscious decision on the author's part, I'm sure. Because this book was meant to be all about his father - his dark silent drinking, his sudden inexplicable rages, his occasional brutality and violence toward his wife and sons. But mostly I think Burroughs was simply trying to figure it all out, perhaps to expiate the demons and understand the recurring nightmares that haunted him for decades after he left home. Judging from the structure of the book, it seems he wrote most of the book while his father was still living, but waited to finish and published it only after his father's death.
This is a sad story, perhaps even a tragic one. But I think it's a better one that RwS, written with an intense and yearning honesty, resulting I think in a kind of redemptive self-discovery for Burroughs. The last couple of chapters dealing with his father's demise and its aftermath are wrenching enough to break your heart. I hope this book did rid Burroughs of his doubts, demons and nightmares. No one deserves a childhood like the one he endured.
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LibraryThing member ABookVacation
I liked this book a lot. My only qualm is that, yet another book has a book jacket that sucks you in, and then barely, it ever, deals with what's on the jacket. I wanted to know about the murder/dream of the woods. Figures it doesn't deliver.
LibraryThing member CasualFriday
This is a prequel to the best-selling Running with Scissors, which I have not read. Told mostly from the point of view of Burroughs as a young boy, it is often quite sad and disturbing, but an oddly easy read, with a soupçon of redemption at the end. Burroughs presents his father as emotionally
Because of all the media coverage of Burroughs' veracity issues, I was constantly second-guessing the truthfulness of the narrative as I read. Yet, unlike Jeanette Walls' The Glass Castle, my BS meter did not often go off. Burroughs' mother and brother have their own memoirs, and I'm not inclined to adjudicate their respective cases, but this book felt true to me.
Warning: two depictions of animal abuse. This kind of stuff is usually a deal-breaker for me, but I had to stick with the book because it's for my library book club.
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neglectful, violent and alcoholic, and his mother as not up to the task of protecting herself or her children.Because of all the media coverage of Burroughs' veracity issues, I was constantly second-guessing the truthfulness of the narrative as I read. Yet, unlike Jeanette Walls' The Glass Castle, my BS meter did not often go off. Burroughs' mother and brother have their own memoirs, and I'm not inclined to adjudicate their respective cases, but this book felt true to me.
Warning: two depictions of animal abuse. This kind of stuff is usually a deal-breaker for me, but I had to stick with the book because it's for my library book club.
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Subjects
Awards
Audie Award (Finalist — Audiobook of the Year — 2009)
Language
Original language
English
Original publication date
2008-04-10
ISBN
0312342020 / 9780312342029