Status
Available
Call number
Collection
Publication
Submitted in partial fulfillment of the Master of Arts in Process Work and the Diploma in Process Work, Process Work Institute, Portland, OR, 2009
Local notes
http://www.processwork.org/files/Finalprojects/Blair_L_September_2009.pdf
“When a performance is good, the world stops. Even as the house lights dim, we enter that transitional, numinous state where the present “everyday” world recedes, and we discover a world much more real than real life.”‐ Arlene Audergon, Diplomate, founder and teacher of Process Acting, from the Journal of Process Oriented Psychology.
There is nothing to me like watching an actor in a film or on stage who is so utterly believable that you forget they are acting, you forget you are watching a performance, you are merely captivated and moved as if you were given a sneak peak into someone’s real life, up close and personal, raw and real. I also know that there is nothing like the moment while acting when somehow, magically, miraculously, the words start flowing out between you and the other actor with such scintillation, with such a vibrant feeling of being alive in that very perfectmoment that you want it to last forever. It is what some people might call bliss or a moment of enlightenment or the very spark of life. In the fall of 2006, I began wondering what I else I might want in my life, what would make my life feel more whole and satisfying. I was already in a fulfilling long‐term relationship and I was finally enrolled and in the midst of graduate school after many years of waiting for the right moment to continue my education; things were going relatively well for me. But I wanted more to my current and future life especially in the area of creativity. I love art, mostly visual and textile arts – photography, painting, knitting, weaving, sewing – but had dabbled here and there in my childhood in the field of acting and had a secret dream of seeing myself in a theater, on stage, lights blaring on my face, before a captive audience – a star! The fantasy reminds me of the dance recital I was in at the age of about eight years old. My grandparents made a special visit to New Hampshire to see me in the recital, a culmination of a year’s worth of training and practice. They brought me a bouquet of pink sweetheart roses in a yellow smiley‐faced mug and all day long, they refused to call me by my given name, but instead called me “Star” or spelled it out “S‐ta‐r!” Mostly I considered my “being on stage” fantasy just that – a fantasy, not a reality. Nothing I should actually pursue. Sure, it made me glow when I thought of it, but I had no sense that I had the guts or the motivation to do anything at all about it. Life, however, had something different in mind for me. Within about one week of having this fantasy recur, I received a flyer in the mail from the Portland Center Stage Greenhouse School of Theater. It advertised a new acting school for adults, especially for adults who had little or no prior acting experience. The price was well within reason and the description was perfect for what I wanted and needed. I was delighted, but only secretly at first. In fact, it was the very kind of thing that I could easily have dismissed entirely, never to utter a word out loud about it. But instead, something gave me just enough of an urge to mention it to my partner, David. In fact, my birthday was coming up soon and it could be the perfect birthday present I thought. The night I brought it up, David could tell it was somehow important dreaming for me and was immediately on board with full support and interest. He insisted that I fill out the form, write the check immediately that night, and mail it out the next day, so that I wouldn’t miss the opportunity. That was over two years ago, and five acting classes later, I am on my way to my dream of being on stage, in those blaring lights, in front of a captive audience. I also like to think that I am already living that dream now as the process by which I live my life according to who I am as an actor: exploring my acting impulses, expanding my sense of identity, and discovering how acting informs my larger life.
“When a performance is good, the world stops. Even as the house lights dim, we enter that transitional, numinous state where the present “everyday” world recedes, and we discover a world much more real than real life.”‐ Arlene Audergon, Diplomate, founder and teacher of Process Acting, from the Journal of Process Oriented Psychology.
There is nothing to me like watching an actor in a film or on stage who is so utterly believable that you forget they are acting, you forget you are watching a performance, you are merely captivated and moved as if you were given a sneak peak into someone’s real life, up close and personal, raw and real. I also know that there is nothing like the moment while acting when somehow, magically, miraculously, the words start flowing out between you and the other actor with such scintillation, with such a vibrant feeling of being alive in that very perfectmoment that you want it to last forever. It is what some people might call bliss or a moment of enlightenment or the very spark of life. In the fall of 2006, I began wondering what I else I might want in my life, what would make my life feel more whole and satisfying. I was already in a fulfilling long‐term relationship and I was finally enrolled and in the midst of graduate school after many years of waiting for the right moment to continue my education; things were going relatively well for me. But I wanted more to my current and future life especially in the area of creativity. I love art, mostly visual and textile arts – photography, painting, knitting, weaving, sewing – but had dabbled here and there in my childhood in the field of acting and had a secret dream of seeing myself in a theater, on stage, lights blaring on my face, before a captive audience – a star! The fantasy reminds me of the dance recital I was in at the age of about eight years old. My grandparents made a special visit to New Hampshire to see me in the recital, a culmination of a year’s worth of training and practice. They brought me a bouquet of pink sweetheart roses in a yellow smiley‐faced mug and all day long, they refused to call me by my given name, but instead called me “Star” or spelled it out “S‐ta‐r!” Mostly I considered my “being on stage” fantasy just that – a fantasy, not a reality. Nothing I should actually pursue. Sure, it made me glow when I thought of it, but I had no sense that I had the guts or the motivation to do anything at all about it. Life, however, had something different in mind for me. Within about one week of having this fantasy recur, I received a flyer in the mail from the Portland Center Stage Greenhouse School of Theater. It advertised a new acting school for adults, especially for adults who had little or no prior acting experience. The price was well within reason and the description was perfect for what I wanted and needed. I was delighted, but only secretly at first. In fact, it was the very kind of thing that I could easily have dismissed entirely, never to utter a word out loud about it. But instead, something gave me just enough of an urge to mention it to my partner, David. In fact, my birthday was coming up soon and it could be the perfect birthday present I thought. The night I brought it up, David could tell it was somehow important dreaming for me and was immediately on board with full support and interest. He insisted that I fill out the form, write the check immediately that night, and mail it out the next day, so that I wouldn’t miss the opportunity. That was over two years ago, and five acting classes later, I am on my way to my dream of being on stage, in those blaring lights, in front of a captive audience. I also like to think that I am already living that dream now as the process by which I live my life according to who I am as an actor: exploring my acting impulses, expanding my sense of identity, and discovering how acting informs my larger life.