Call number
954.930 DER
Collection
Publication
Knopf (2013), Edition: First Edition, 240 pages
Description
On the morning of December 26, 2004, on the southern coast of Sri Lanka, Sonali Deraniyagala lost her parents, her husband, and her two young sons in the tsunami she miraculously survived. In this brave and searingly frank memoir, she describes those first horrifying moments and her long journey since. She has written an engrossing, unsentimental, beautifully poised account: as she struggles through the first months following the tragedy, furiously clenched against a reality that she cannot face and cannot deny; and then, over the ensuing years, as she emerges reluctantly, slowly allowing her memory to take her back through the rich and joyous life she's mourning, from her family's home in London, to the birth of her children, to the year she met her English husband at Cambridge, to her childhood in Colombo; all the while learning the difficult balance between the almost unbearable reminders of her loss and the need to keep her family, somehow, still alive within her.--Publisher description.… (more)
Media reviews
This is possibly the most moving book I have ever read about grief, but it is also a very, very fine book about love. For grief is the black hole that is left in our lives when we lose someone irreplaceable – a child, a parent, a lover. It is the negative image that, in its blackness, sometimes
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reveals love with a greater clarity than its positive counterpart. And while in Wave love reveals itself by the bleak intensity of the pain of absolute, irreplaceable loss, it is in the end a love story, and a book about the importance of love. Show Less
It is a nightmarish tale of what happened that desperate day and the desolation and rage that followed. At times, Deraniyagala’s honesty shocks.
The word “brave” is used a lot to describe those who write about their deepest traumas — too often, I think — but it’s an apt description of Deraniyagala. She has fearlessly delivered on memoir’s greatest promise: to tell it like it is, no matter the cost. The result is an unforgettable
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book that isn’t only as unsparing as they come, but also defiantly flooded with light. Show Less
User reviews
LibraryThing member brenzi
”I wasn’t stuck under anything. I was moving. I could tell now. My body was curled up, I was spinning fast. Am I underwater? It didn’t feel like water, but it has to be, I thought. I was being dragged along, and my body was whipping backwards and forwards. I couldn’t stop myself. When at
On December 26, 2004, Sonali Deraniyagala was vacationing at a hotel on the southern coast of Sri Lanka, with her family---her husband, two sons and her parents---when a tsunami hit. By the end of the day she knew that the rest of her family had been swept away leaving her as the only survivor. In haunting prose, her memoir explains how she managed to get through those first few days after the tragedy, vaulting between disbelief and acceptance, until final acknowledgment and preservation of the memories of the wonderful years she shared with her family.
It’s always interesting when reading about people who overcome great obstacles and prevail in a way that we cannot even begin to understand, to wonder how we would respond to similar circumstances. I think when we do this we often can’t give ourselves much credit for exhibiting similar characteristics and so it was with this story which left me wondering how I would respond to a tragedy of this magnitude. But the author understands this, I think, and explains very courageously, how difficult it was to go on living with the immense guilt that this tragedy foisted on her. She certainly thought she would kill herself, and prepared for it. She also tried drowning her sorrows in alcohol and drugs. But at some point in time she realized that rather than stifle the memories she had she would gradually allow them to be a part of her and planned accordingly. I’m sure writing this memoir helped in preserving as well as sharing the memories of her two boys, her husband Steve and her parents. She came to realize she needed these memories and so they changed from a catalyst for sorrow to a vehicle for healing. I think that was what made her writing so powerful without being sentimental. And as times passes, she found her grief turning into something quite different:
”Seven years on, and their absence has expanded. Just as our life would have in this time, it has swelled. So this is a new sadness, I think. For I want them as they would be now. I want to be in our life. Seven years on, it is distilled, my loss. For I am not whirling anymore, I am no longer cradled by shock….But I have learned that I can only recover myself when I keep them near. If I distance myself from them, and their absence, I am fractured. I am left feeling I’ve blundered into a stranger’s life.”
I finished this memoir feeling very grateful for all I’ve been given. Very highly recommended.
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times my eyes opened, I couldn’t see water. Smoky and gray. That was all I could make out. And my chest hurt. It hurt like it was being pummeled by a great stone…The water was pulling me along with a speed I did not recognize, propelling me forward with a power I could not resist. I was shoved through branches of trees and bushes, and here and there my elbows and knees smashed into something hard.”(Page 10-11)On December 26, 2004, Sonali Deraniyagala was vacationing at a hotel on the southern coast of Sri Lanka, with her family---her husband, two sons and her parents---when a tsunami hit. By the end of the day she knew that the rest of her family had been swept away leaving her as the only survivor. In haunting prose, her memoir explains how she managed to get through those first few days after the tragedy, vaulting between disbelief and acceptance, until final acknowledgment and preservation of the memories of the wonderful years she shared with her family.
It’s always interesting when reading about people who overcome great obstacles and prevail in a way that we cannot even begin to understand, to wonder how we would respond to similar circumstances. I think when we do this we often can’t give ourselves much credit for exhibiting similar characteristics and so it was with this story which left me wondering how I would respond to a tragedy of this magnitude. But the author understands this, I think, and explains very courageously, how difficult it was to go on living with the immense guilt that this tragedy foisted on her. She certainly thought she would kill herself, and prepared for it. She also tried drowning her sorrows in alcohol and drugs. But at some point in time she realized that rather than stifle the memories she had she would gradually allow them to be a part of her and planned accordingly. I’m sure writing this memoir helped in preserving as well as sharing the memories of her two boys, her husband Steve and her parents. She came to realize she needed these memories and so they changed from a catalyst for sorrow to a vehicle for healing. I think that was what made her writing so powerful without being sentimental. And as times passes, she found her grief turning into something quite different:
”Seven years on, and their absence has expanded. Just as our life would have in this time, it has swelled. So this is a new sadness, I think. For I want them as they would be now. I want to be in our life. Seven years on, it is distilled, my loss. For I am not whirling anymore, I am no longer cradled by shock….But I have learned that I can only recover myself when I keep them near. If I distance myself from them, and their absence, I am fractured. I am left feeling I’ve blundered into a stranger’s life.”
I finished this memoir feeling very grateful for all I’ve been given. Very highly recommended.
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LibraryThing member TerriBooks
I can't imagine the emotional and spiritual damage you would go through, losing your children, your husband and your parents all at once. Unfortunately, after reading this memoir, I'm still not able to. The author has gone through a horrible experience; I'm just not sure it's one she's really ready
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to share. This book reads more like a diary or journal, maybe an exercise in facing grief. But for a book released to the public it's too self-centered. I never felt invited in, that there was anything here that was meant to move me to more than profound sympathy. Show Less
LibraryThing member ASKelmore
This was a pick-up at my favorite independent bookstore last weekend. I found it engrossing in the beginning, although I struggled to finish it. Not because it was bad, or even too heavy. I think I was just easily distracted.
Wave is Dr. Sonali Deraniyagala’s story about her life after the 2004
Each section of this book follows a timeline, from the moment just before the tsunami hit through 2012, when Dr. Deraniyagala is teaching in New York City. It is heartbreaking at times (obviously), but it doesn’t feel like any other book of loss I’ve read. I think part of that is due to the fact that the book continues over so many years; it isn’t just about her first year of trying to get through the pain; it is about how her life has changed and how it hasn’t. It’s about how she is honest with herself but not honest with strangers when it comes to that part of her life.
I am having trouble describing the feelings the book brought up in me. This wasn’t about a ‘triumphant journey of unimaginable tragedy,’ this was instead a look into the life of one individual dealing with loss on a very large scale. Yet it’s often confined to chapters of the author unwilling to leave her room, or the house she is in, or the city she is in.
There is no one moment where she rises up and ‘moves on,’ instead the book serves as a way for Dr. Deraniyagala to both share the story of her life since 2012, and also share who her sons and husband were. There are stories of Dr. Deraniyagala contemplating suicide in a very matter-of-fact manner, but there are also stories about how much her son Vik loved blue whales. It’s both a love letter to her family and a way to let the world know a little bit about what it is like for someone to work through loss on a daily, monthly, and yearly basis.
I think this is a book worth reading. I appreciate that it wasn’t as simplistic as some of the memoirs I’ve read; Dr. Deraniyagala shares the reality of loss in a way I haven’t read before. I don’t know if it would be helpful for someone who has lost a child or partner, but I can see it providing some confirmation that grief manifests in myriad ways, and that’s just how it is.
Wave is Dr. Sonali Deraniyagala’s story about her life after the 2004
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tsunami that wracked Southeast Asia. She was visiting a resort town in her native Sri Lanka with her parents, husband, and two sons. She was the only one to survive the tsunami.Each section of this book follows a timeline, from the moment just before the tsunami hit through 2012, when Dr. Deraniyagala is teaching in New York City. It is heartbreaking at times (obviously), but it doesn’t feel like any other book of loss I’ve read. I think part of that is due to the fact that the book continues over so many years; it isn’t just about her first year of trying to get through the pain; it is about how her life has changed and how it hasn’t. It’s about how she is honest with herself but not honest with strangers when it comes to that part of her life.
I am having trouble describing the feelings the book brought up in me. This wasn’t about a ‘triumphant journey of unimaginable tragedy,’ this was instead a look into the life of one individual dealing with loss on a very large scale. Yet it’s often confined to chapters of the author unwilling to leave her room, or the house she is in, or the city she is in.
There is no one moment where she rises up and ‘moves on,’ instead the book serves as a way for Dr. Deraniyagala to both share the story of her life since 2012, and also share who her sons and husband were. There are stories of Dr. Deraniyagala contemplating suicide in a very matter-of-fact manner, but there are also stories about how much her son Vik loved blue whales. It’s both a love letter to her family and a way to let the world know a little bit about what it is like for someone to work through loss on a daily, monthly, and yearly basis.
I think this is a book worth reading. I appreciate that it wasn’t as simplistic as some of the memoirs I’ve read; Dr. Deraniyagala shares the reality of loss in a way I haven’t read before. I don’t know if it would be helpful for someone who has lost a child or partner, but I can see it providing some confirmation that grief manifests in myriad ways, and that’s just how it is.
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LibraryThing member khiemstra631
A survivor's story of the tsunami in Sri Lanka in which she lost her husband, her two young sons and her parents. She nearly also lost herself in its aftermath. This is an interesting first-hand account of an event that hardly anyone will ever experience. Almost ten years later the author is still
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haunted and devastated by her experience. Show Less
LibraryThing member bobbieharv
Fascinating first-person account from a woman who lost her whole family - husband, children, parents - in the tsunami. Less a memoir, and thus less a work of art, than a personal working-through of grief. Hard to imagine how one gets through it.
LibraryThing member tinkerbellkk
This was a beautifully written memoir of a woman who lost her children, husband and parents during the 2004 Tsunami.
The mother describes in such an honest way her grief and guilt. It is gut wrenching to think about enduring such a tragedy and I feel this author was so real in her writing. You can
Makes you think about how very precious life really is and how you should be truly grateful for what you have as things can change in a moment.
The mother describes in such an honest way her grief and guilt. It is gut wrenching to think about enduring such a tragedy and I feel this author was so real in her writing. You can
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tell that the book was an exercise in healing as she worked through the devastating loss. Makes you think about how very precious life really is and how you should be truly grateful for what you have as things can change in a moment.
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LibraryThing member Beamis12
I recently saw the movie Impossible, which was about this same tsunami. A mother, her husband and three sons are staying at a resort when thew tsunami hits. I really liked the mom in the movie, which was also based on a true story, so the mom in this one was not one in which I could easily relate.
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It is the most horrible thing in the world to lose your whole family, but at the beginning of the book she did not know that yet, so her attitude just turned me off. I know people react different ways when faced with a tragedy so maybe she was in shock. I am sure this will be very unpopular with many readers but this whole pity genre is one I don't quite understand. If one feels the need to write about something in their lives that was horrible or that one needed to write as a catharsis, I understand. But why publish and try to make money from it? Anyway this is what it is, the tsunami as terrible without doubt, many families would never be the same and I feel horrible for this woman and all the families. Show Less
LibraryThing member etxgardener
On the morning of December 26, 2004, Sonalia Deraniyagala was looking out the window of her hotel in Yala National Park on the southern coast of Sri Lanka, when she saw a huge wave approaching the shore. She & her husband and two young sons started running and jumped into a hotel jeep to get to
How does one survive such a devastating loss? As the book relates, she almost didn't. But after spending six months in close to a catatonic state, Ms. Deraniyagala starts to climb out of the deep, black hole left by the catastrophic event. It takes years and years, but in the end she emerges, not wholly repaired, but able to face life and the future.
This is a truly remarkable story of loss grief and survival.
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higher ground. But they were not fast enough. The water overtook the jeep sending the family scattering in different directions in the swirling waters. When the tide receded (in minutes? hours? Who can tell?) Sonali was alive, but her parents, husband and children were all dead.How does one survive such a devastating loss? As the book relates, she almost didn't. But after spending six months in close to a catatonic state, Ms. Deraniyagala starts to climb out of the deep, black hole left by the catastrophic event. It takes years and years, but in the end she emerges, not wholly repaired, but able to face life and the future.
This is a truly remarkable story of loss grief and survival.
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LibraryThing member andreablythe
"On the morning of December 26,2004, on the southern coast of Sri Lanka, Sonali Deraniyagala lost her parents, her husband, and her two young sons in the tsunami she miraculously survived."
This memoir is a heartbreaking and brave account of her grief following this tragic event, from the first
This memoir is a heartbreaking and brave account of her grief following this tragic event, from the first
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years of nearly incompacitated shock through slow painful healing into a place where she can live the memory of this she loved and lost. Frank and lyrically told, this story was tragic to read, but also beautifully wrought and loving. Not and easy thing to read about, but really fantastic. Show Less
LibraryThing member pcpayne
The book was good but I originally thought it was more about the actual event. It was about how she dealt with the loss of her family and her struggles to maintain life herself.
LibraryThing member preetalina
This was a tough one - tough to read, tough to review. There are far better reviews out there for this that you should probably check out.
I picked this up randomly at the library while perusing the new non-fiction. I figured it would be gut-wrenching but it was something I was interested in.
I
The whole time I was reading, I kept getting goosebumps. I kept imagining myself in her place and wondering how I would go on. That's what really made it so heavy for me.
Granted, the author comes from a life of privilege - she had family and friends to fall back on, a career, etc. - all of which many other survivors did not have. But this book isn't about the tsunami and its overall devastation. It is a very personal memoir about one woman's experience and her grief. It is a raw, no-holds-barred, emotional journey.
This book is definitely not for everyone. But I'm glad I came across it.
I picked this up randomly at the library while perusing the new non-fiction. I figured it would be gut-wrenching but it was something I was interested in.
I
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didn't really have any expectations as to what the book would be about. But it turned out to be a haunting, sad, depressing story about a survivor of the tsunami that hit Sri Lanka in 2004. She was the sole survivor in her family, while her parents, husband, and two children all perished.The whole time I was reading, I kept getting goosebumps. I kept imagining myself in her place and wondering how I would go on. That's what really made it so heavy for me.
Granted, the author comes from a life of privilege - she had family and friends to fall back on, a career, etc. - all of which many other survivors did not have. But this book isn't about the tsunami and its overall devastation. It is a very personal memoir about one woman's experience and her grief. It is a raw, no-holds-barred, emotional journey.
This book is definitely not for everyone. But I'm glad I came across it.
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LibraryThing member BevFuller
Wow!!! What a story. I've known loss and pain, but it could never compare to Sonali's loss. This book is a gift from her spirit and soul. Amazing.
LibraryThing member BadCursive
Title: Wave
Author: Sonali Deraniyagala
Genre: Non-Fiction, Memoir
Publisher: Alfred A. Knopf
Date: 2013
Pages: 228
Modern Library: N/A
Started: 14 November 2013
A friend came over for dinner and brought me this book to read. I’ve been holding on to it for a couple of months and thought it was about time
I just finished the first chapter and understandably this book is painful to read. Deraniyagala has lost her husband, two young sons, and probably her parents to the storm. I only say “probably” about her parents because their deaths have not yet been confirmed by the recovery of their bodies. You know they are dead, but you don’t want to believe it, just as Deraniyagala refuses to believe it until there is factual evidence. Without knowing, they can still live in her mind. There is a constant pulse in the background of this chapter, it is Deraniyagala’s mantra, “I have to kill myself” (43). I get the feeling this is born from survivor’s guilt more than a desire to join her family members. Luckily, Deraniyagala has a strong support system of friends and family that never leave her side.
Reading this book takes on additional meaning this week. I am sure I am reading the stories of thousands of families in the Philippines. This gives me greater insight and understanding of their plight. They are not just faces on the nightly news.
A note on Deraniyagala’s style. She is straight forward with her prose. There is no fluff, only Deraniyagala telling readers her personal thoughts, even the nasty ones, as she moves through this tragedy.
As the book continues Deraniyagala takes readers to her parents home where she torments the new owners, to the ICA bar in London where Steve would take her on dates, then to the New York apartment filled with Steve’s belongings and special memories. When she is at her home in London Deraniyagala sorts through the children’s clothes and toys and relates stories and thoughts attached to each item. There is no relief, not even for a second, something you would expect in a situation like this.
Towards the end of the book I notice the tone lightens. I don’t get a sense of acceptance, so it’s not in that way. To me it seems more like Deraniyagala is beat down to the point where she is too tired to grieve, but it’s not that her grief has lessened. I think she is finally able to have a good memory and allow it to make her smile. As the book closes, Deraniyagala remembers her three boys (husband included in the sum) laughing and rolling around together on the lawn. I get the sense she feels some relief.
Read this book if it crosses your path. It’s short enough that it won’t bring you down for long. It might also provide some perspective on the massive storms you hear about on the news. If you’re lucky you will never have to live through one.
Finished: 24 November 2013
Author: Sonali Deraniyagala
Genre: Non-Fiction, Memoir
Publisher: Alfred A. Knopf
Date: 2013
Pages: 228
Modern Library: N/A
Started: 14 November 2013
A friend came over for dinner and brought me this book to read. I’ve been holding on to it for a couple of months and thought it was about time
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I crack the cover. I’m going into this one somewhat blind. I know this is a first person account of the tsunami that struck Sri Lanka the day after Christmas 2004. I know Deraniyagala lost family members in the tidal wave that hit her hotel. I imagine this book addresses her loss and recovery, if one can ever get over such a thing. We’ll see.I just finished the first chapter and understandably this book is painful to read. Deraniyagala has lost her husband, two young sons, and probably her parents to the storm. I only say “probably” about her parents because their deaths have not yet been confirmed by the recovery of their bodies. You know they are dead, but you don’t want to believe it, just as Deraniyagala refuses to believe it until there is factual evidence. Without knowing, they can still live in her mind. There is a constant pulse in the background of this chapter, it is Deraniyagala’s mantra, “I have to kill myself” (43). I get the feeling this is born from survivor’s guilt more than a desire to join her family members. Luckily, Deraniyagala has a strong support system of friends and family that never leave her side.
Reading this book takes on additional meaning this week. I am sure I am reading the stories of thousands of families in the Philippines. This gives me greater insight and understanding of their plight. They are not just faces on the nightly news.
A note on Deraniyagala’s style. She is straight forward with her prose. There is no fluff, only Deraniyagala telling readers her personal thoughts, even the nasty ones, as she moves through this tragedy.
As the book continues Deraniyagala takes readers to her parents home where she torments the new owners, to the ICA bar in London where Steve would take her on dates, then to the New York apartment filled with Steve’s belongings and special memories. When she is at her home in London Deraniyagala sorts through the children’s clothes and toys and relates stories and thoughts attached to each item. There is no relief, not even for a second, something you would expect in a situation like this.
Towards the end of the book I notice the tone lightens. I don’t get a sense of acceptance, so it’s not in that way. To me it seems more like Deraniyagala is beat down to the point where she is too tired to grieve, but it’s not that her grief has lessened. I think she is finally able to have a good memory and allow it to make her smile. As the book closes, Deraniyagala remembers her three boys (husband included in the sum) laughing and rolling around together on the lawn. I get the sense she feels some relief.
Read this book if it crosses your path. It’s short enough that it won’t bring you down for long. It might also provide some perspective on the massive storms you hear about on the news. If you’re lucky you will never have to live through one.
Finished: 24 November 2013
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LibraryThing member konastories
Powerful, painful, beautiful and moving book. Deraniyagala shares her story and her grief after her parents, husband and two sons are killed in the Indonesian tsunami that she survives.
LibraryThing member HelenGress
The sole survivor in her family after the Xmas Tsunami that hit Sri Lanka, the author describes what she remembers of the day. The book is haunting- she details how the sights and sounds of once familiar foods, places, and people affect her. Gradually Sonali is able to come out of the paralyzing
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grief and function. The writing is honest, reflective and so evocative. One of the thoughts which remains with me (although I am not directly quoting)-- how can this be real? It is like a myth or legend. Show Less
LibraryThing member CasaBooks
Profound.
Read at your own risk depending on how raw your emotions are this week.
Each reading session with this book, left me with a lump in my throat that didn't easily dissipate.
Early in the book, I was annoyed with what seemed repetitious recounting of suffering, but then . . . isn't that how we
The difficulty is in the remembering - and not being swallowed by the grieving
or in the grieving and not losing the joys that we had.
Not many of us have had a tragedy of such dimension, yet for every loss as Sonali suffered, there are impossibly unfathomable and untold millions of others throughout the world who have had such losses.
It's a wonder we can't open our door and hear the howls of agony echoing around the globe and perhaps each time the sun rises, we must not fail to remember our good fortune.
Read at your own risk depending on how raw your emotions are this week.
Each reading session with this book, left me with a lump in my throat that didn't easily dissipate.
Early in the book, I was annoyed with what seemed repetitious recounting of suffering, but then . . . isn't that how we
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deal with such a harrowing experience, incredible loss and the mourning and grieving. I couldn't quit the book and glad I didn't.The difficulty is in the remembering - and not being swallowed by the grieving
or in the grieving and not losing the joys that we had.
Not many of us have had a tragedy of such dimension, yet for every loss as Sonali suffered, there are impossibly unfathomable and untold millions of others throughout the world who have had such losses.
It's a wonder we can't open our door and hear the howls of agony echoing around the globe and perhaps each time the sun rises, we must not fail to remember our good fortune.
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LibraryThing member Karen59
"For I am not whirling anymore, I am no longer cradled by shock….But I have learned that I can only recover myself when I keep them near. If I distance myself from them, and their absence, I am fractured. I am left feeling I’ve blundered into a stranger’s life.” These are my favorite line
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of the book. It seems so dead-on. No whining or pitying here, just honest, rock-bottom grieving. No arch of redemption, just an searingly honest look at loss. Show Less
LibraryThing member csayban
It was supposed to be just another vacation for Sonali Deraniyagala and her family from their home in London to her birthplace in southern Sri Lanka. As her parents, her husband, her two young sons and she woke on the morning of December 26, 2004, they found themselves running for their lives from
“I am in the unthinkable situation that people cannot bear to contemplate.”
Wave is really not a documentary of the Indian Ocean tsunami that killed so many in late 2004. Deraniyagala describes in detail what happened to her on that day and how little she knew about the scope of what happened until much later. But Wave is really about her life as a survivor after the waters had receded. Deraniyagala is frank and unsentimental about what she thought and felt in the hours, days, months and years after she lost her whole family. From thoughts of suicide to hatred towards the people around her, numbing the pain with drugs and alcohol and trying to accept the unacceptable, she opens up everything to the reader.
While I felt for Deraniyagala’s plight in Wave, I never fully emotionally engaged with what she was going through. There was a bit of disconnect – which had the feel of her trying to protect the reader from experiencing the searing emotions that she continues to grapple with. That bit of distance might also be defensive for her because – as she freely admits – there is no happy ending. Her life is still a shadow of her former life where she struggles every day to push on. Unfortunately, this creates a memoir that feels a bit antiseptic instead of the visceral experience I was expecting.
Criticisms aside, Wave is an important story, if for no other reason than it is a means of recovery for Sonali Deraniyagala that could not have been easy to undertake. Wave also serves to remind all of us that our seemingly safe lives can be turned upside-down in an instance, so treasure the gift of the time you have with your loved ones – never take it for granted. In communicating that message, Deraniyagala is truly successful. Hopefully, the success of this book will help her find peace.
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a tsunami that would claim more than 230,000 lives in fourteen countries. When it was over, only Sonali survived. “I am in the unthinkable situation that people cannot bear to contemplate.”
Wave is really not a documentary of the Indian Ocean tsunami that killed so many in late 2004. Deraniyagala describes in detail what happened to her on that day and how little she knew about the scope of what happened until much later. But Wave is really about her life as a survivor after the waters had receded. Deraniyagala is frank and unsentimental about what she thought and felt in the hours, days, months and years after she lost her whole family. From thoughts of suicide to hatred towards the people around her, numbing the pain with drugs and alcohol and trying to accept the unacceptable, she opens up everything to the reader.
While I felt for Deraniyagala’s plight in Wave, I never fully emotionally engaged with what she was going through. There was a bit of disconnect – which had the feel of her trying to protect the reader from experiencing the searing emotions that she continues to grapple with. That bit of distance might also be defensive for her because – as she freely admits – there is no happy ending. Her life is still a shadow of her former life where she struggles every day to push on. Unfortunately, this creates a memoir that feels a bit antiseptic instead of the visceral experience I was expecting.
Criticisms aside, Wave is an important story, if for no other reason than it is a means of recovery for Sonali Deraniyagala that could not have been easy to undertake. Wave also serves to remind all of us that our seemingly safe lives can be turned upside-down in an instance, so treasure the gift of the time you have with your loved ones – never take it for granted. In communicating that message, Deraniyagala is truly successful. Hopefully, the success of this book will help her find peace.
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LibraryThing member txpam
Astonishing read from a first author. Stayed with me and stays with me. This will be in the top five favs.
LibraryThing member nyiper
The author thanks her therapist in the acknowledgements---it's almost as if she is telling her story to the reader, who is acting as another silent therapist. She writes beautifully, if hauntingly. The resurfacing of details over time is truly astounding as so many years pass and she is still
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swallowed by the past---it really puts a different picture on the idea that one can work through grief. This makes it seem much more never-ending and perhaps everyone simply hides their real self as they go on living after the death of loved ones. That said, the absolute moments of her loss were so profoundly and particularly horrific---losing everyone so close to her so suddenly---she has produced something amazing as a result. Show Less
LibraryThing member countrylife
What a heart-rending tragedy – losing your children, husband and parents all at once as victims of the Sri Lanka tsunami. The book starts with the tsunami in 2004 and progresses through the author’s life afterwards, through her stages of grief and coming to terms with her survivor’s guilt.
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Her story was told well enough, but it felt as though her rich family, ivy-league educated, countless-vacationed self was more the focus of the story than her family. I am horrified at the losses suffered by all those affected by the tsunami, but this particular book didn’t resonate. Show Less
LibraryThing member ct92
I feel sorry for her, and I thought it was a very touching story, but I didn't really like the book. It just failed to make me feel very much, other than the sadness I was already feeling on behalf of the people who lost their loved ones in the tsunami. Nothing new was really added, for me.
LibraryThing member nancynova
rabck from GoryDetails; very little about the Tsunami, it's more reminiscent of Didion's Year of Magical Thinking. The authors husband, sons and parents all perished in the Tsunami wave, and she is the lone survivor. A lot of "magical thinking" as she comes to terms with losing her family in her
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home country on a vacation, and picking up the pieces of her life in England without them. Show Less
LibraryThing member lizmacd
I didn't love this book. I'm sorry. The author suffered a profound loss for which I am so sorry. But I just skimmed the last 40% of the book because it was constant memories of her family. The first 10 pages tell about what happened to her - which is unreal. But I just couldn't read so much about
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her memories. I hope writing this was therapeutic for her and wish her nothing but the best. I can't imagine living through this. Just not a great book. Show Less
LibraryThing member mjlivi
Wow, what a beautiful, awful, amazing book. Deraniyagala lost her entire family in Sri Lanka during the 2004 tsunami and this book tells the story of that loss and the grief that followed. I almost put it down after the first 10 pages - it's too upsetting, too intense, too sad - but with a few deep
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breaths I pushed on. The remainder of the book is an aching mediation on loss, love and grief as Deraniyagala struggles to remember and honour her family without falling into complete anguish. It's a hard, hard book to read, but a beautiful and moving one. Show Less
Awards
National Book Critics Circle Award (Finalist — Autobiography/Memoir — 2013)
CBC Bookie Awards (Nominee — 2014)
Barnes and Noble Discover Great New Writers Award (Finalist — Non-Fiction — 2013)
Ackerley Prize (Winner — 2014)
Kirkus Reviews Best Book of the Year (Nonfiction — 2013)
San Francisco Chronicle Best Book of the Year (Nonfiction — 2013)
Christian Science Monitor Best Book (Nonfiction — 2013)
Globe and Mail Top 100 Book (2013)
Pages
240
ISBN
0307962695 / 9780307962690