Call number
362.82 SNY
Collection
Genres
Publication
Bloomsbury Publishing (2019), Edition: 1, 320 pages
Description
Politics. Sociology. Nonfiction. HTML:WINNER OF THE HILLMAN PRIZE FOR BOOK JOURNALISM, THE HELEN BERNSTEIN BOOK AWARD, AND THE LUKAS WORK-IN-PROGRESS AWARD * A NEW YORK TIMES TOP 10 BOOKS OF THE YEAR * NATIONAL BOOK CRITICS CIRCLE AWARD FINALIST * LOS ANGELES TIMES BOOK PRIZE FINALIST * ABA SILVER GAVEL AWARD FINALIST * KIRKUS PRIZE FINALIST NAMED ONE OF THE BEST BOOKS OF 2019 BY: Esquire, Amazon, Kirkus, Library Journal, Publishers Weekly, BookPage, BookRiot, Economist, New York Times Staff Critics "A seminal and breathtaking account of why home is the most dangerous place to be a woman . . . A tour de force." -Eve Ensler "Terrifying, courageous reportage from our internal war zone." -Andrew Solomon "Extraordinary." -New York Times ,"Editors' Choice" "Gut-wrenching, required reading." -Esquire "Compulsively readable . . . It will save lives." -Washington Post "Essential, devastating reading." -Cheryl Strayed, New York Times Book Review An award-winning journalist's intimate investigation of the true scope of domestic violence, revealing how the roots of America's most pressing social crises are buried in abuse that happens behind closed doors. We call it domestic violence. We call it private violence. Sometimes we call it intimate terrorism. But whatever we call it, we generally do not believe it has anything at all to do with us, despite the World Health Organization deeming it a "global epidemic." In America, domestic violence accounts for 15 percent of all violent crime, and yet it remains locked in silence, even as its tendrils reach unseen into so many of our most pressing national issues, from our economy to our education system, from mass shootings to mass incarceration to #MeToo. We still have not taken the true measure of this problem. In No Visible Bruises, journalist Rachel Louise Snyder gives context for what we don't know we're seeing. She frames this urgent and immersive account of the scale of domestic violence in our country around key stories that explode the common myths-that if things were bad enough, victims would just leave; that a violent person cannot become nonviolent; that shelter is an adequate response; and most insidiously that violence inside the home is a private matter, sealed from the public sphere and disconnected from other forms of violence. Through the stories of victims, perpetrators, law enforcement, and reform movements from across the country, Snyder explores the real roots of private violence, its far-reaching consequences for society, and what it will take to truly address it.… (more)
Media reviews
In its scope and seriousness — its palpable desire to spur change — this book invites reflection not only about violence but about writing itself. What kinds of reportage really move policy? What kinds of narrative — what sorts of tone, structure, examples — can stoke a reader’s outrage
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and then translate that outrage into action, keeping it from curdling into cynicism or despair? Show Less
User reviews
LibraryThing member GennaC
“The culture that tells women to keep the family intact, to find love and be loved at all costs, is the same culture that emasculates and shames man in abusive situations, that tells men if they are victims, it is because they are weak and not real men. It is the same culture that tells them
I am learning and I am hurting. I spent a considerable amount of time on this review and on processing No Visible Bruises. This book is acutely, vitally important. Considering the Violence Against Women Act, which expired a year ago to date. Considering the murder of women by intimate partner violence has increased 11% since 2014. Considering the majority of mass shootings in the United States begin as domestic violence. Considering the CDC found in 2017 that more than eight million girls experienced rape or intimate partner violence before the age of eighteen. Considering over 50 women are killed every month in the United States by intimate partners. We are floundering and we are suffering.
This book is an educational revelation that will keep you up at night and instill you with the need to publicly roar about this profound yet under addressed issue that is corrupting and razing our communities. No Visible Bruises is the ideal balance of storytelling, science, and statistics, as Snyder moves us, informs us, and incites change in us. She approaches the issues from all angles, considering not just the victims, but also the perpetrators, the lawmakers, the shelter workers, the advocates, the police officers, the medical professionals, leaving no stone unturned. Snyder shreds notions we’ve internalized involving victim blaming and the inherent misogyny in how we report on and discuss intimate partner violence. Parts of No Visible Bruises made me sob, others made me queasy, and still others made me rage with indignant recognition.
“If men are taught not to cry, women are taught crying is acceptable. If men are taught anger is their sole allowable emotion, women are taught never to be angry. Men who yell are being men; women who yell are shrill or they’re drama queens or they’re hysterical...Sinclair calls this ‘the elephant in the room.’ That we won’t say, simply, that it is men who are violent. It is men who take their violence out on masses of others. School shootings are carried out by young men. Mass murders. Gang warfare, murder-suicides and familicides and matricides and even genocides: all men. Always men.”
Snyder applies her journalistic expertise to seemingly every challenging aspect of domestic violence including the essential gagging of medical professionals by HIPAA laws; the often insurmountable challenges rehab programs for batterers face; the sometimes deadly communication failures between police, shelter staff, and hospital staff; the survival mindset many victims of domestic violence embody, which often looks like acquiescence to outsiders who lack understanding of the framework; and, finally, a systemic viewing of domestic violence as just that, a domestic issue, which leads to poorly written laws, gaping loopholes, and a lack of understanding of how domestic violence escalates, resulting in the deaths of countless women. No Visible Bruises firmly rejects any easy explanations, cop outs, oversimplified solutions, and insistence that our society and our system has done anything other than fail women left dead by intimate partner violence.
“Read any news story today about domestic violence homicide and you’re likely to see some version of the question why didn’t she leave? What you almost surely won’t see is why was he violent? Or better yet, why couldn’t he stop his violence?”
Reading things like “Domestic violence didn’t become a crime in Washington D.C., until 1991” and “The United States spends as much as twenty-five times more on researching cancer or heart disease than it does on violence prevention” and “In many states today, still, victims are barred from using their long histories of enduring violence at the hands of their partners in their own defense” and “Nearly 30% of [police] officers with domestic violence complaints were still employed in their same positions a year later” makes my stomach plummet to the ground. Snyder juxtaposes chilling statistics and harsh realities with tangible solutions, insisting that despite dismal realities we can be catalysts for change. No Visible Bruises is a fluid read and by far one of the most compelling nonfiction narratives that I have ever read, coming at a critical time in our society and enduring as a symbol of hope. Absolutely essential reading.
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violence is acceptable as a response to any external threat or internal pain, but tears are not. It is a culture that limits both victim and perpetrator, the abused and the abuser.”I am learning and I am hurting. I spent a considerable amount of time on this review and on processing No Visible Bruises. This book is acutely, vitally important. Considering the Violence Against Women Act, which expired a year ago to date. Considering the murder of women by intimate partner violence has increased 11% since 2014. Considering the majority of mass shootings in the United States begin as domestic violence. Considering the CDC found in 2017 that more than eight million girls experienced rape or intimate partner violence before the age of eighteen. Considering over 50 women are killed every month in the United States by intimate partners. We are floundering and we are suffering.
This book is an educational revelation that will keep you up at night and instill you with the need to publicly roar about this profound yet under addressed issue that is corrupting and razing our communities. No Visible Bruises is the ideal balance of storytelling, science, and statistics, as Snyder moves us, informs us, and incites change in us. She approaches the issues from all angles, considering not just the victims, but also the perpetrators, the lawmakers, the shelter workers, the advocates, the police officers, the medical professionals, leaving no stone unturned. Snyder shreds notions we’ve internalized involving victim blaming and the inherent misogyny in how we report on and discuss intimate partner violence. Parts of No Visible Bruises made me sob, others made me queasy, and still others made me rage with indignant recognition.
“If men are taught not to cry, women are taught crying is acceptable. If men are taught anger is their sole allowable emotion, women are taught never to be angry. Men who yell are being men; women who yell are shrill or they’re drama queens or they’re hysterical...Sinclair calls this ‘the elephant in the room.’ That we won’t say, simply, that it is men who are violent. It is men who take their violence out on masses of others. School shootings are carried out by young men. Mass murders. Gang warfare, murder-suicides and familicides and matricides and even genocides: all men. Always men.”
Snyder applies her journalistic expertise to seemingly every challenging aspect of domestic violence including the essential gagging of medical professionals by HIPAA laws; the often insurmountable challenges rehab programs for batterers face; the sometimes deadly communication failures between police, shelter staff, and hospital staff; the survival mindset many victims of domestic violence embody, which often looks like acquiescence to outsiders who lack understanding of the framework; and, finally, a systemic viewing of domestic violence as just that, a domestic issue, which leads to poorly written laws, gaping loopholes, and a lack of understanding of how domestic violence escalates, resulting in the deaths of countless women. No Visible Bruises firmly rejects any easy explanations, cop outs, oversimplified solutions, and insistence that our society and our system has done anything other than fail women left dead by intimate partner violence.
“Read any news story today about domestic violence homicide and you’re likely to see some version of the question why didn’t she leave? What you almost surely won’t see is why was he violent? Or better yet, why couldn’t he stop his violence?”
Reading things like “Domestic violence didn’t become a crime in Washington D.C., until 1991” and “The United States spends as much as twenty-five times more on researching cancer or heart disease than it does on violence prevention” and “In many states today, still, victims are barred from using their long histories of enduring violence at the hands of their partners in their own defense” and “Nearly 30% of [police] officers with domestic violence complaints were still employed in their same positions a year later” makes my stomach plummet to the ground. Snyder juxtaposes chilling statistics and harsh realities with tangible solutions, insisting that despite dismal realities we can be catalysts for change. No Visible Bruises is a fluid read and by far one of the most compelling nonfiction narratives that I have ever read, coming at a critical time in our society and enduring as a symbol of hope. Absolutely essential reading.
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LibraryThing member arosoff
It's one thing to take you through a domestic violence (or, as we could call it, intimate partner terrorism) and answer the question "why do victims stay?" It's something else to ask another question: "Why do we ask victims to leave? Why don't we ask abusers to stop?"
Whatever answers we have to
She focuses primarily on physical violence and its ultimate endpoint, murder. But physical violence doesn't exist on its own. It's intimately tied to emotional terror and control, and understanding that is key to any solutions. Snyder seeks to answer her own questions about teaching abusers to stop by looking at programs that try to teach abusers to change. This is difficult to read--I came away feeling that the programs are important and necessary, but that as a woman I could never afford to risk trusting any of the men in them.
There are a lot of systemic failures to document, but there are also efforts aimed at correcting those flaws and improving knowledge--understanding which women are in the most danger, why shelter is a flawed answer, improving police and advocacy.
The stories in this book--and the questions they raised--hit me in the gut and as I do so often, I came away feeling that there was so much more to discuss.
Whatever answers we have to
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that question, Snyder's decision to ask it--and to ask us why we don't--hit me in the gut. Of course, I think abusers should stop. But like everyone else, I always asked first why the victim didn't leave, because that's what I was taught to ask. No Visible Bruises is more than a catalogue of systemic failures, though there's plenty to show. Snyder is also interested in deeper questions--about violence and gender and about our society's relationship to gendered violence. She focuses primarily on physical violence and its ultimate endpoint, murder. But physical violence doesn't exist on its own. It's intimately tied to emotional terror and control, and understanding that is key to any solutions. Snyder seeks to answer her own questions about teaching abusers to stop by looking at programs that try to teach abusers to change. This is difficult to read--I came away feeling that the programs are important and necessary, but that as a woman I could never afford to risk trusting any of the men in them.
There are a lot of systemic failures to document, but there are also efforts aimed at correcting those flaws and improving knowledge--understanding which women are in the most danger, why shelter is a flawed answer, improving police and advocacy.
The stories in this book--and the questions they raised--hit me in the gut and as I do so often, I came away feeling that there was so much more to discuss.
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LibraryThing member ms_rowse
This took me a long time to read, because Snyder's research is so harrowing that I could only read it in chunks. But this is vital reading. I was so encouraged to read of the many people across the country trying to get a toe-hold anywhere to addressing how law enforcement, judges, clergy, social
As Snyder writes, "No victim of domestic violence ever imagines that they're the type of person who would wind up in such a situation. Whatever we envision when we envision a victim, there is one universal truth to each and every one of those images: none of us ever picture ourselves."
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workers, and families can work together to save lives of the abused. This book will tear you up, might even cause you to judge the women and men whose stories you read. Don't. As Snyder writes, "No victim of domestic violence ever imagines that they're the type of person who would wind up in such a situation. Whatever we envision when we envision a victim, there is one universal truth to each and every one of those images: none of us ever picture ourselves."
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LibraryThing member Susan.Macura
This is an amazingly written, researched and insightful look at domestic violence in our country today. To say I have learned a great deal from this book would be an understatement, despite the fact that I thought I knew a great deal about it. It is so important to understand the factors involved
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with domestic violence because it causes so many other problems, including mass shootings. This is a tremendous resource for us all. Show Less
LibraryThing member YWCAUtahLibrary
The author studied the topic for over seven years, has gathered compelling stories, and offers ways of moving beyond violence.
LibraryThing member Iudita
Not a very cheery subject but a very affecting book that gives you an inside understanding of domestic abuse. I am wiser for having read it because I apparently didn't understand the many nuances to abusive behaviour . Things I hadn't ever considered. I now understand why the abused person doesn't
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just leave. I would recommend this to anyone who is interested in social issues. Show Less
LibraryThing member larryerick
Really solid journalism. The narrative is roughly broken into three main segments: the victims, the perpetrators, and the victim advocates and crime investigators. I will admit that, at first, the coverage of the victims, centering on a particular case in Montana, as superbly written as it was, was
Back then, I met a woman on a jury panel for a rape case. I was the jury foreman. After the verdict was turned in, we needed to decompress from the tension of the case, so we took a breather from the courtroom for a beverage near by. Perhaps it was because of the subject matter of the case or maybe how I responded to it but this woman started to slowly confide in me about her own situation. I was kept in the loop as the situation progressed. As briefly as I can describe it, she had two small kids, worked as professional, and her husband was a radio DJ. Knowing that the "Psycho" shower scene freaked her out, he would purposely leave a big kitchen knife outside her shower. (There's a reference to a rattlesnake in this book that applies.) She separates from him, and files for divorce. During that process, she changes the locks of her house, but he figures out how to get in through a window in the garage in the middle of the night, into the house, and into the bedroom, where he holds her by her throat while he rapes her, and leaves. With some encouragement, she files a rape charge, including submitting to a rape kit. He is not yet in jail but has a restraining order against him. She goes to a women's shelter. He tracks her down. She moves out to an apartment in a nearby town. He tracks her down. So far, no violence, but his anger escalates. He shows up one evening with a shotgun demanding to be let in. Prepared for this eventuality, the cops are called. He's arrested, tried, convicted, and sent to prison. I should say, sent back to prison. The two had met while she was teaching classes inside a prison. While drunk, he had shot his roommate to death because the roommate had laughed at him. Her family upbringing had been highly religious, fundamentalist Christian.
Soon after, I found myself studying domestic violence and "battered women" cases. I even did a college research paper on it. I will always remember one of the female students in the class during my paper's presentation, with her eyes bugging out while I described the situations on which I was reporting. I never knew if she was shocked by the subject matter or she thought I was describing her own current situation. A year or two after the trial, I finally bumped into the woman and her two kids again at a local mall. She was shadowed by a man hovering over her like a Secret Service agent. Had she found herself in a similar situation again? Or had the new guy heard the whole story and was hyper-vigilant against a repeat?
The good news is (1) the author is exceptional in both detail and word craft in her coverage of victims, (2) she very interestingly and quite intimately gets feedback from a number of people who had committed domestic violence, helping to understand the source of the problem, and (3) the coverage of what research and what programs have been implemented over the years, sheds light on what is actually helping. The downside is those programs have not flourished and spread nearly far enough or rapidly enough. Thus, the need for this book.
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disturbing to me in how it showed how very little had been done to avoid and respond to domestic violence -- intimate partner terrorism -- since the case I personally saw unfold in the very early 1980s.Back then, I met a woman on a jury panel for a rape case. I was the jury foreman. After the verdict was turned in, we needed to decompress from the tension of the case, so we took a breather from the courtroom for a beverage near by. Perhaps it was because of the subject matter of the case or maybe how I responded to it but this woman started to slowly confide in me about her own situation. I was kept in the loop as the situation progressed. As briefly as I can describe it, she had two small kids, worked as professional, and her husband was a radio DJ. Knowing that the "Psycho" shower scene freaked her out, he would purposely leave a big kitchen knife outside her shower. (There's a reference to a rattlesnake in this book that applies.) She separates from him, and files for divorce. During that process, she changes the locks of her house, but he figures out how to get in through a window in the garage in the middle of the night, into the house, and into the bedroom, where he holds her by her throat while he rapes her, and leaves. With some encouragement, she files a rape charge, including submitting to a rape kit. He is not yet in jail but has a restraining order against him. She goes to a women's shelter. He tracks her down. She moves out to an apartment in a nearby town. He tracks her down. So far, no violence, but his anger escalates. He shows up one evening with a shotgun demanding to be let in. Prepared for this eventuality, the cops are called. He's arrested, tried, convicted, and sent to prison. I should say, sent back to prison. The two had met while she was teaching classes inside a prison. While drunk, he had shot his roommate to death because the roommate had laughed at him. Her family upbringing had been highly religious, fundamentalist Christian.
Soon after, I found myself studying domestic violence and "battered women" cases. I even did a college research paper on it. I will always remember one of the female students in the class during my paper's presentation, with her eyes bugging out while I described the situations on which I was reporting. I never knew if she was shocked by the subject matter or she thought I was describing her own current situation. A year or two after the trial, I finally bumped into the woman and her two kids again at a local mall. She was shadowed by a man hovering over her like a Secret Service agent. Had she found herself in a similar situation again? Or had the new guy heard the whole story and was hyper-vigilant against a repeat?
The good news is (1) the author is exceptional in both detail and word craft in her coverage of victims, (2) she very interestingly and quite intimately gets feedback from a number of people who had committed domestic violence, helping to understand the source of the problem, and (3) the coverage of what research and what programs have been implemented over the years, sheds light on what is actually helping. The downside is those programs have not flourished and spread nearly far enough or rapidly enough. Thus, the need for this book.
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LibraryThing member rivkat
Intertwines some detailed histories of murdered women and one ambiguously reformed abuser with broader investigations into what we know about stopping domestic violence. We do know the biggest risk factors for homicide (including prior strangulation, which can produce lost memories/brain injury
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making it even harder for victims to be taken seriously); what is often missing is training for first responders about how to identify who’s at greatest risk; connections among service providers so that people who could help know that help is needed; and resources in general. Among the most interesting parts: the idea that a domestic violence shelter is both a terrible solution (it requires the victim to uproot her life and her children and hide from the abuser, and often forces women into poverty if they weren’t there already) and a necessary backstop absent other resources. Snyder looks at some innovative programs that try to find victims ways to stay in their communities; right now, this mostly seems to involve locking abusers up for relatively extended periods, and she doesn’t inquire much into whether this is a good long-term solution. Show Less
LibraryThing member Sovranty
Well researched and storied, giving more than just the cold statistics of those caught in the cycle of domestic violence. The journalistic aspect brings to life the lack of network and support, on a personal, cultural, and governmental level, that seems to doom even the strongest survivor of abuse
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to a continued life of torment with no hope of escape. Thought provoking and eye opening to the responsibility of the village to protect each of its inhabitants. Show Less
LibraryThing member DrT
Book title and author: No Visible Bruises: What We Don’t Know About Domestic Violence Can Kill Us Rachel Louse Snyder reviewed 1-3-24
Why I picked this book up: Preparation for working with a young woman that experienced DV.
Thoughts: This covers the sad commonality of Domestic Violence. Choking
Why I finished this read: I learned more about the cycles, they dynamics, suggestions, problem solving.
Stars rating: Given the heavy hitting DV in ours society 5 of 5 stars
Why I picked this book up: Preparation for working with a young woman that experienced DV.
Thoughts: This covers the sad commonality of Domestic Violence. Choking
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nearly always precedes a homicide attempt; teach police to recognize the signs and instruct doctors to assess women for traumatic brain injury. This book is written in 3 important portions. It is a pervasive, concerning, and real problem mostly for women as the victims, yes males experience DV too but it is usually the male abuser and the female victim. The demographics are broader then male/female but the drew a fine point in my mind about this problem and need for treatment.Why I finished this read: I learned more about the cycles, they dynamics, suggestions, problem solving.
Stars rating: Given the heavy hitting DV in ours society 5 of 5 stars
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Awards
Kirkus Prize (Finalist — Nonfiction — 2019)
LA Times Book Prize (Finalist — 2019)
National Book Critics Circle Award (Finalist — Nonfiction — 2019)
American Bar Association Silver Gavel Award (Finalist — 2020)
BookTube Prize (Bronze — Nonfiction — 2020)
Hillman Prize (Book — 2020)
Publishers Weekly's Best Books of the Year (Nonfiction — 2019)
The New York Times Notable Books of the Year (Nonfiction — 2019)
Pages
320
ISBN
1635570972 / 9781635570977