I Wish You All the Best

by Mason Deaver

Paperback, 2020

LCC

PS3604.E2258

Status

Available

Call number

PS3604.E2258

Publication

PUSH (2020), Edition: Reprint, 336 pages

Description

Perfect for fans of Adam Silvera and Becky Albertalli, Mason Deaver's STUNNING debut will rip your heart out before showing you how to heal from tragedy and celebrate life in the process. When Ben De Backer comes out to their parents as nonbinary, they're thrown out of their house and forced to move in with their estranged older sister, Hannah, and her husband, Thomas, whom Ben has never even met. Struggling with an anxiety disorder compounded by their parents' rejection, they come out only to Hannah, Thomas, and their therapist and try to keep a low profile in a new school. But Ben's attempts to survive the last half of senior year unnoticed are thwarted when Nathan Allan, a funny and charismatic student, decides to take Ben under his wing. As Ben and Nathan's friendship grows, their feelings for each other begin to change, and what started as a disastrous turn of events looks like it might just be a chance to start a happier new life. At turns heartbreaking and joyous, I Wish You All the Best is both a celebration of life, friendship, and love, and a shining example of hope in the face of adversity.… (more)

User reviews

LibraryThing member Citizenjoyce
There’s a reason I didn’t become a psychiatric nurse for children. Lord o’ Mercy, the narcissism in this book is so overwhelming it’s enough to drown the reader. First there’s the normal narcissism of the teenage years then it is multiplied a hundred times by Ben’s innate narcissism. I
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know there is a tendency of people to focus in their imperfections and think they are the most important thing in the world: if only I were thinner or had a smaller nose or bigger breasts or a clear complexion or a 6 pack or could hit a home run everyone would like me. All Ben thinks about is the fact that they are binary (and god forbid you use the wrong pronoun). No one else is important, they think only about themselves for the entire book. Perhaps one method of treatment would be to convince them to get over themselves and give a slight bit of attention to the rest of the world. I think this book would be helpful to teenagers who think in the same vein, but for adults, it’s punishing.
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LibraryThing member RavenNight
I really loved this book. As a nonbinary person in North Carolina, I loved reading a book about a nonbinary person in North Carolina written by a nonbinary person in North Carolina. It made me feel so much less alone. I read this book so fast. It’s definitely one of my favorites now.
LibraryThing member elenaj
There's a lot to love here. The POV character Ben and their love interest Nathan are a great couple, and the romance is charming and full of sweet teenage obliviousness. It's great to see a nonbinary YA romance.

But there is something weird in the dynamic with Ben's parents and also with their
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therapist. I wasn't convinced by the parents' actions - they didn't seem internally consistent, but instead like they were driven by the demands of the plot. And the therapist's advice about how to deal with Ben's parents seemed pretty far off-target to me a lot of the time, like the therapist was following Ben into black and white thinking about their parents instead of taking a broader view.

That said, this was still a good, quick read, and I'd like to see more from this author.
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LibraryThing member Carolee888
I finished, I Wish You all the Best. It is a fictional story written about a non-binary person and written by one, Mason Deaver. It is the only book on the subject that I have ever read, and it is a deeply personal story. I bought it, because I read a second book by them and I wanted to understand
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what living a non-binary life is like. I applaud them for their courage for writing. I am learning to
use the correct pronouns for the first time and now getting it why they are so important to them. One point that really came across to me is that we need to protect and love our children.

The parents were very difficult to understand. Their dad was ultra controlling and seemed to have very narrow views. Their mother wanted to love her son, but she could not be trusted to keep a deep secret. Nathan's came closer to the attitude that I feel most comfortable with, "I love you, no matter what, it does not make a different on how you want to be, as long as you are yourself and are happy.
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LibraryThing member reader1009
diverse teen fiction (nonbinary gets kicked out by parents, settles in with estranged sister, meets black boy in Greensboro/Raleigh, NC; #ownvoices)
An important and heartwrenching story with a sweet enby-boy romance. Thank you, Mason Deacon.
LibraryThing member oldandnewbooksmell
I Wish You All the Best is such a groundbreaking book that will let multiple people feel seen.

Trigger Warnings: misgendering, homophobia, anxiety, depression

When Ben finally decides to come out to their parents that they're nonbinary, everything goes south and Ben's out on the streets in just their
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socks. They call a sister they haven't had any contact with in 10 years to come pick them up and they begin living with them. Ben just wants to get through the last half of senior year unnoticed but they meet Nathan, a charming and humorous student who gets asked to show Ben around on their first day at their new high school, and feelings start to grow. Trying to deal with the rejection of their parents, depression and anxiety, as well as if and when they want to come out, Ben has a lot of their plate.

So much happens within just the first three chapters alone that my heart breaks for Ben and all I want is for them to have a happy ending. I believe this is a book that needs to be added to everyone's reading list.
- It really dives into how being closeted, even slightly, can affect mental health.
- How living a life that isn't 100% true to you is agonizing (in Ben's case, misgendering).
- The book, in my opinion, shows what it's truly like to have a panic attack and trying to figure out the triggers and then going through the steps to try and calm your nerves.
- It shines light on those who haven't really had much light shined on them in mainstream anything. There is a pansexual character in the book and so far, I've only read one other book with that representation and it made me smile.
- The book also brings up the struggle of figuring out "how and why do I want to label myself?" Rather that's to live your life to the fullest, to connect to others, or to give yourself a sense of being, everyone's reasons are different and Ben's story mentions that quite a bit.

Though I understand the book was focusing on Ben's journey as they begin coming out as nonbinary and trying to work through their anxiety and depression, I do wish some of the relationships were more flushed out. I feel like scenes were just glazed over and I just wish I would see more of Ben's friendships grow.
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LibraryThing member mcelhra
I decided to choose a book about a nonbinary person for the Transrights Readathon because that’s probably thetrans readathon identity that’s hardest for me to wrap my head around. And reading is a great way to gain understanding. I Wish You All the Best is a young adult novel about Ben, who is
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kicked out of their house when they come out to their parents as nonbinary. Like, kicked out so fast they don’t even have time to grab their phone or their shoes! Luckily, Ben finds a pay phone and calls their older sister to come to get them. She left their parents’ oppressive household ten years ago and never looked back.

Ben starts a new high school in the town their sister lives in but is still afraid to come out to their new friends, in part because of how traumatizing coming out to their parents was. They have panic attacks and are in therapy. Eventfully, they start medication as well.

This book was so well done. The author is nonbinary as well and their author’s note explains how they have drawn on their experiences as well as the experiences of others to tell this story. This book will lead to greater understanding for those people who want to learn more about what it means to be nonbinary and will make any nonbinary readers feel like they are not alone. Highly recommended.
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LibraryThing member sparemethecensor
Sigh. You know, I wanted to like this. I appreciate what the author is doing here. But...this was the most on the nose, uncomplex, frankly boring version of this story. It's YA, sure, but teens can handle more characterization than this.
LibraryThing member BarnesBookshelf
I cried so much reading this. This book, more than anything, is sad. It hits you right in a deep place and makes the tears flow. And it's cathartic.

The plot was not what I was expecting. Based on the synopsis and Deaver's previous novel, I was expecting it to be more of a rom-com than anything
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else. Instead, it's an exploration of the grief one experiences when losing a loved one so close to them. But it's good. It's really, really good. Just make sure you have the tissue box ready.

TW: Suicidal thoughts, attempted self-harm
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Awards

Volunteer State Book Award (Nominee — High School — 2021)
Rhode Island Teen Book Award (Nominee — 2021)
Best Fiction for Young Adults (Selection — 2020)

Language

Original language

English

Original publication date

2019-05-14

Physical description

8.2 inches

ISBN

1338608355 / 9781338608359

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