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Fiction. Literature. Humor (Fiction.) HTML: A rollicking, globe-trotting adventure with a twist: a four-legged heroine you won't soon forgetElsie Bovary is a cow, and a pretty happy one at that�??her long, lazy days are spent eating, napping, and chatting with her best friend, Mallory. One night, Elsie and Mallory sneak out of their pasture; but while Mallory is interested in flirting with the neighboring bulls, Elsie finds herself drawn to the farmhouse. Through the window, she sees the farmer's family gathered around a bright Box God�??and what the Box God reveals about something called an "industrial meat farm" shakes Elsie's understanding of her world to its core. There's only one solution: escape to a better, safer world. And so a motley crew is formed: Elsie; Jerry�??excuse me, Shalom�??a cranky, Torah-reading pig who's recently converted to Judaism; and Tom, a suave (in his own mind, at least) turkey who can't fly, but who can work an iPhone with his beak. Toting stolen passports and slapdash human disguises, they head for the airport. Elsie is our wise-cracking, pop-culture-reference-dropping, slyly witty narrator; Tom�??who does eventually learn to fly (sort of)�??dispenses psychiatric advice in a fake German accent; and Shalom, rejected by his adopted people in Jerusalem, ends up unexpectedly uniting Israelis and Palestinians. David Duchovny's charismatic creatures point the way toward a mutual understanding and acceptance that the world despe… (more)
User reviews
His debut novel brings out that humor as well as some life lessons for our heroine, Elsie the cow.
When she discovers what humans do to farm animals, she
She unwillingly takes in two other farm animals that have abilities that she needs. Jerry, the pig, renames himself Shalom once he decides that he also needs to escape the farm. He wishes to go to Israel where they hate pigs. He can talk himself into and out of almost anything.
Tom the turkey also wants in on the escape and he can work the cell phone with his beak. He wants to go to Turkey, figuring that people there would not eat their country's namesake.
The adventure that follows is filled with humor and the suspension of logic that all talking animal stories rely on.
It keeps the reader interested and entertained.
All in all, a pretty good debut from the man that embodied Fox Mulder, the original believer.
100% read this because Duchovny wrote it and 100% certain that was the only reason I like it at all!
Holy Cow by David Duckovy
reminded me
Of Swine not
By Jimmy Buffett
In that I hated it.
I love Buffet and Duchovny. Holy Cow, however, is hard to comprehend as to what it actually is. Is it a children’s book? An adult humor book? A fable or a joke? It is a about a regular milk cow that sees the Box
It reads like a middle school novel. However, it has adult humor and concepts. Duchovny makes an attempt to explain how a cow could book a flight on an airplane, but leaves as many questions as he answers. At the end, he addresses inconsistencies by saying it is just a story, However, he clearly has never been on a farm.
His message is clear and directly on the page. The cow addresses the reader directly and spouts off what is on the authors mind. I agree with it, but I wanted a story.
I did read this book, so it kept me turning the page. It however, did not have a satisfying end.
Of course, word spreads quickly on a farm. Enter Jerry the Torah-quoting pig with a desire to live in Israel and Tom the turkey who wants flee to--you guessed it--Turkey. Together, the three embark on a globe-trotting escapade of enlightenment, understanding, and mutual respect.
Duchovny’s anthropomorphic adventure is a fast, funny, and uplifting read. Be prepared to suspend your disbelief while opening your mind and heart.