Dinners with Ruth: A Memoir on the Power of Friendships

by Nina Totenberg

Hardcover, 2022

Status

Available

Publication

Simon & Schuster (2022), 320 pages

Description

Biography & Autobiography. Family & Relationships. Nonfiction. HTML:Celebrated NPR correspondent Nina Totenberg delivers an extraordinary memoir of her personal successes, struggles, and life-affirming relationships, including her beautiful friendship of nearly fifty years with Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg. Four years before Nina Totenberg was hired at NPR, where she cemented her legacy as a prizewinning reporter, and nearly twenty-two years before Ruth Bader Ginsburg was appointed to the Supreme Court, Nina called Ruth. A reporter for The National Observer, Nina was curious about Ruth's legal brief, asking the Supreme Court to do something revolutionary: declare a law that discriminated "on the basis of sex" to be unconstitutional. In a time when women were fired for becoming pregnant, often could not apply for credit cards or get a mortgage in their own names, Ruth patiently explained her argument. That call launched a remarkable, nearly fifty-year friendship. Dinners with Ruth is an extraordinary account of two women who paved the way for future generations by tearing down professional and legal barriers. It is also an intimate memoir of the power of friendships as women began to pry open career doors and transform the workplace. At the story's heart is one, special relationship: Ruth and Nina saw each other not only through personal joys, but also illness, loss, and widowhood. During the devastating illness and eventual death of Nina's first husband, Ruth drew her out of grief; twelve years later, Nina would reciprocate when Ruth's beloved husband died. They shared not only a love of opera, but also of shopping, as they instinctively understood that clothes were armor for women who wanted to be taken seriously in a workplace dominated by men. During Ruth's last year, they shared so many small dinners that Saturdays were "reserved for Ruth" in Nina's house. Dinners with Ruth also weaves together compelling, personal portraits of other fascinating women and men from Nina's life, including her cherished NPR colleagues Cokie Roberts and Linda Wertheimer; her beloved husbands; her friendships with multiple Supreme Court Justices, including Lewis Powell, William Brennan, and Antonin Scalia, and Nina's own family�??her father, the legendary violinist Roman Totenberg, and her "best friends," her sisters. Inspiring and revelatory, Dinners with Ruth is a moving story of the joy and true meaning of friendsh… (more)

Rating

½ (72 ratings; 4)

User reviews

LibraryThing member laytonwoman3rd
50. [Dinners With Ruth] by Nina Totenberg This is subtitled "A Memoir on the Power of Friendships", and all I can say is, everyone should have such friends as Nina Totenberg, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Cokie Roberts and a few other high-powered Washington women who I would happily welcome as next-door
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neighbors. Their husbands were no slouches in the “friend in need” department either. I was moved to tears more than once reading this lovely tribute to the “Notorious RBG”, a role model for women...for all humanity, really...in so many aspects of her life. I learned a lot about how journalists interact with their sources, and how tough it can be to stay on the proper side of an amorphous and invisible “line” when those sources turn into friends. Complicating Nina Totenberg’s situation with Justice Ginsberg was the fact that in later years, her own husband, Dr. David Reines, became a consultant to RBG in connection with the cancer and other health issues she dealt with. His commitment to confidentiality meant that he knew things about the Justice’s condition that he could not share with Nina. I realize the reader is getting a very personal and subjective picture of these relationships, but I marvel at the compassion, wit, integrity and mutual understanding that allowed for such deep friendships in spite of so many potential pitfalls. I will also note that there were at least 4 incredibly strong marriages (two of them Nina’s, as she was widowed in 1998, and subsequently remarried) highlighted in this book, and that is heartening to read about. There’s a lot of sadness even in what seem like privileged lives...the ravages of cancer, traumatic brain injury and dementia; the complications of the COVID pandemic; the loss of beloved spouses. On a less personal level, there is plenty of information in here about politics, the legal system in general, and naturally the Supreme Court in particular. A highly satisfactory and solidly recommended read.
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LibraryThing member carolfoisset
Not quite what I was expecting. Really enjoyed parts of it and others drug on, lots of medical details about Nina's first husband.
Liked the ending and the parts about her female. relationships with other strong, influential women.
LibraryThing member tangledthread
Memoir on different aspects of friendship with the author's relationship with Ruth Bader Ginsberg as the centerpiece of the discussion. I listened to the audiobook because I like listening to Nina Totenberg's reporting on NPR.
The story is not really about RBG, but more about the friendship the two
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women shared over their long professional lives.
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LibraryThing member LivelyLady
A chronicle of both the lives of two impressive women as well as their friendship. Very moving, informative, and detailed. The political aspects were dense but interesting. Also, these women coming up during the womens' movement and the court decisions they witnessed. Very good. I cried at the end.
LibraryThing member JRobinW
I think the most important contribution of this book is the history that Totenberg writes about as much as or more than her friendship with Ruth. That history is vital to us all hoping to keep our democracy.
LibraryThing member bookczuk
I'm pretty much jealous that I have never gotten to know, personally, either of these remarkable women.
2023 read.
LibraryThing member alanna1122
I enjoyed this book very much. I have seen some criticism about the fact that it is not solely about the relationship of Nina and Ruth (though much is about that) and maybe it would have been better served by a broader title. I listened to the audio and it was a good book for that - I have enjoyed
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Nina Totenberg for years on NPR so I was familiar with her voice and style.
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LibraryThing member kaulsu
The title was clearly designed to sell books on the heels of #RBG's death. And, the last quarter of the book was truly devoted to her memory. But the first three-quarters were Totenberg's memoir combined with her friendships with Cokie Roberts and someone named Linda. Of course, in the small print
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on the front cover after the title, it was written "a memoir on the power of friendships." One of the downsides of reading an e-edition of a book is that the reader doesn't necessairly ever see the front of the book again--until it is finished.
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LibraryThing member witchyrichy
Dinners With Ruth: A Memoir on the Power of Friendships by Nina Totenberg was another bingo book: a memoir. I had read an earlier book about the women of NPR--Susan, Linda, Nina & Cokie--so was familiar with Nina Totenberg in a more personal way than just from her journalism work. She is, by all
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accounts, the tougher, feistier friend in the group so I am not surprised that she and RBG became lifelong friends. Totenberg uses that connection to move outward to other friends as well from her NPR colleagues to Supreme Court Justices. While there were plenty of juicy details related to the Court, including the Anita Hill case that is arguably Totenberg's biggest story, it was the personal reflection and insights into the lives of these women who were shattering the glass ceiling.
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LibraryThing member Katyefk
I really enjoyed reading this book. These two women are so inspiring with their capacity for friendship and their own professional work. Keeping these separate as required was a demonstration of their high ethical standards and intuitive knowledge as to what was needed and wanted in sometimes very
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difficult situations.
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Awards

BookTube Prize (Octofinalist — Nonfiction — 2023)

Language

Original language

English

Original publication date

2022-09

Physical description

320 p.; 8.38 inches

ISBN

1982188081 / 9781982188085
Page: 0.4993 seconds