Status
Checked out
Due 13-04-2023
Call number
Publication
Simon & Schuster UK (2023), Edition: 1, 352 pages
Description
Fiction. Literature. Romance. HTML:From the New York Times bestselling author of The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo comes an all-new audio production read by Julia Whelan, including a bonus conversation with Julia Whelan and Taylor Jenkins Reid, recorded exclusively for this edition. When Lauren and Ryan's marriage reaches the breaking point, they come up with an unconventional plan. They decide to take a year off in the hopes of finding a way to fall in love again. One year apart, and only one rule: they cannot contact each other. Aside from that, anything goes. Lauren embarks on a journey of self-discovery, quickly finding that her friends and family have their own ideas about the meaning of marriage. These influences, as well as her own healing process and the challenges of living apart from Ryan, begin to change Lauren's ideas about monogamy and marriage. She starts to question: When you can have romance without loyalty and commitment without marriage, when love and lust are no longer tied together, what do you value? What are you willing to fight for? This is a love story about what happens when the love fades. It's about staying in love, seizing love, forsaking love, and committing to love with everything you've got. And above all, After I Do is the story of a couple caught up in an old game�??and searching for a new road to happily ever aft… (more)
User reviews
LibraryThing member whitreidtan
Love is not static. It changes. It is adaptable. It can grow and it can disappear. It is amazingly special but it isn't easy. It has to be worked at. And if you don't pay attention to it, it can be hidden behind the mundanities of everyday life. When this happens, many people give up, finding it
Lauren and Ryan met in college. Their relationship was charmed, the envy of friends and family. But eleven years in and six years into their marriage, all is not well in Camelot. In fact, things are downright unhappy. Lauren and Ryan don't even want to be in the same room together anymore. They snipe at each other, throwing small unkindnesses at each other, freezing each other out, cutting at each other a thousand ways. They are resentful, irritated, and annoyed with the other most of the time. Things finally come to a head when they acknowledge the state of suppressed warfare in their home and they don't know if their marriage can survive the people they've become. The spark is well and truly gone from their relationship and brutally, truthfully, they aren't in love with each other anymore. But they both remember how it used to be and don't want to let that go without at least trying to recover it. So they agree to be apart for a year, not to contact each other, to focus on what they need individually in order to remember why they fell in love in the first place. Their decision isn't an easy or conventional one but they feel as if it is their only chance to save their marriage.
Told mainly through Lauren's experiences, the novel is realistic and honest about the fading of love in the face of small daily resentment after small daily resentment. Reid captures beautifully (and painfully) the building minor aggravations that chip away at the very foundation of happiness, thoughtfulness, and love and how those aggravations ultimately grow so large that they overtake any finer feeling. As their year apart progresses, Lauren reads Ryan's written and saved but unsent emails to her and starts writing her own as well. The sporadic emails allow each of the characters to safely air their grievances, the ways they feel the other has marginalized them, and the things that are so important that they have to change if there will ever be a chance to come back together again. Lauren, with the insights of her mother, her siblings, best friend, and grandmother comes to realize the many shapes that enduring love takes and she must decide if she and Ryan are fighting for happiness and to find a way back to loving each other, as opposed to being "in love" with each other, or if this year apart means that they can and should live without each other.
The emotions are so raw and so completely unadorned and truthful here that some portions of the novel are hard to read. As Lauren works back and forth through her own desires and intentions with regard to Ryan's and her future, the reader swings through foreboding, worry, and happiness all in equal measure. Watching the characters lose themselves almost completely is painful and knowing they will be forever changed at the end of their year apart no matter what their ultimate decision is is nerve-wracking. The narrative tension is consistent and the novel is perfectly paced. This is not really a romance but it is definitely a novel about love, knowing what is worth saving, what real, messy love looks like, and the importance of nurturing it before it is gone. Relatable and instructive, it is a novel worth reading for anyone who has been through the ups and downs of marriage or long term relationship.
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too hard to work their way back to the love they once felt. But are there other options? For Lauren and Ryan, in Taylor Jenkins Reid's newest novel, After I Do, the solution is to take a year off of their marriage to determine if what they once had, the love they once cherished, is worth saving. Lauren and Ryan met in college. Their relationship was charmed, the envy of friends and family. But eleven years in and six years into their marriage, all is not well in Camelot. In fact, things are downright unhappy. Lauren and Ryan don't even want to be in the same room together anymore. They snipe at each other, throwing small unkindnesses at each other, freezing each other out, cutting at each other a thousand ways. They are resentful, irritated, and annoyed with the other most of the time. Things finally come to a head when they acknowledge the state of suppressed warfare in their home and they don't know if their marriage can survive the people they've become. The spark is well and truly gone from their relationship and brutally, truthfully, they aren't in love with each other anymore. But they both remember how it used to be and don't want to let that go without at least trying to recover it. So they agree to be apart for a year, not to contact each other, to focus on what they need individually in order to remember why they fell in love in the first place. Their decision isn't an easy or conventional one but they feel as if it is their only chance to save their marriage.
Told mainly through Lauren's experiences, the novel is realistic and honest about the fading of love in the face of small daily resentment after small daily resentment. Reid captures beautifully (and painfully) the building minor aggravations that chip away at the very foundation of happiness, thoughtfulness, and love and how those aggravations ultimately grow so large that they overtake any finer feeling. As their year apart progresses, Lauren reads Ryan's written and saved but unsent emails to her and starts writing her own as well. The sporadic emails allow each of the characters to safely air their grievances, the ways they feel the other has marginalized them, and the things that are so important that they have to change if there will ever be a chance to come back together again. Lauren, with the insights of her mother, her siblings, best friend, and grandmother comes to realize the many shapes that enduring love takes and she must decide if she and Ryan are fighting for happiness and to find a way back to loving each other, as opposed to being "in love" with each other, or if this year apart means that they can and should live without each other.
The emotions are so raw and so completely unadorned and truthful here that some portions of the novel are hard to read. As Lauren works back and forth through her own desires and intentions with regard to Ryan's and her future, the reader swings through foreboding, worry, and happiness all in equal measure. Watching the characters lose themselves almost completely is painful and knowing they will be forever changed at the end of their year apart no matter what their ultimate decision is is nerve-wracking. The narrative tension is consistent and the novel is perfectly paced. This is not really a romance but it is definitely a novel about love, knowing what is worth saving, what real, messy love looks like, and the importance of nurturing it before it is gone. Relatable and instructive, it is a novel worth reading for anyone who has been through the ups and downs of marriage or long term relationship.
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LibraryThing member LisCarey
Lauren Spencer meets Ryan Cooper when they are nineteen and in college. They are soon deeply in love, and their relationship strengthens and deepens over the years.
But eleven years later, when they have been married six years, somehow that deep connection has vanished. They are fighting constantly,
After a terrible confrontation, they agree on a plan: They will separate for one year, have no contact during that time, and then see if they can put their marriage back together.
We see that year mainly through Lauren's eyes, as she gradually discovers what she really wants, what she wasn't getting in her marriage, what she wasn't giving, and starts to hear, listen to, and learn from, other people's ideas of marriage--her best friend, her sister, her brother, her mother, her grandmother.
This is a novel of character and self-examination, and it's extremely well done. In many ways, it's not my kind of novel, taking place so much inside Lauren's head, and yet I couldn't put it down. I like Lauren, her friends, and her family. It is in the end a novel of growth and attachment, not just for Lauren but for those around her, and it's very, very satisfying.
Recommended.
I received a free electronic galley from the publisher via NetGalley.
But eleven years later, when they have been married six years, somehow that deep connection has vanished. They are fighting constantly,
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avoiding saying what they want from each other to avoid more fighting, and have grown desperately unhappy.After a terrible confrontation, they agree on a plan: They will separate for one year, have no contact during that time, and then see if they can put their marriage back together.
We see that year mainly through Lauren's eyes, as she gradually discovers what she really wants, what she wasn't getting in her marriage, what she wasn't giving, and starts to hear, listen to, and learn from, other people's ideas of marriage--her best friend, her sister, her brother, her mother, her grandmother.
This is a novel of character and self-examination, and it's extremely well done. In many ways, it's not my kind of novel, taking place so much inside Lauren's head, and yet I couldn't put it down. I like Lauren, her friends, and her family. It is in the end a novel of growth and attachment, not just for Lauren but for those around her, and it's very, very satisfying.
Recommended.
I received a free electronic galley from the publisher via NetGalley.
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LibraryThing member dkgarner95
This one gets ALL of the stars but I can't quite tell you why right now because I am too busy trying to mop up my tears.
LibraryThing member nyiper
A multi-story in the sense of following a few different paths of family members following the one year separation of the main character, Lauren, from her husband, Bryan. I really liked the grandmother..... The audio read by Tara Sands was great and I happen to have another CD also read by her in my
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little pile of CDs to listen to soon! Good!! Show Less
LibraryThing member BookishThings
We all want to read books that make us feel all the emotions. After I Do made me laugh, cry, and feel anguish.
Both Lauren and Ryan are strong-willed people, but sometimes it’s really hard to keep a marriage strong. They do the best thing they can think of without getting a divorce. I think Lauren
I love that Lauren has such a strong family connection. Her siblings and mom drive her crazy sometimes, but she loves them fiercely. I also like that each person supports her, but can also give her their opinion on what they think she should do. I do think that Lauren’s biggest hurdle is thinking she is a failure for having a rough go at marriage. It’s not easy, and she begins to understand that. Just because things aren’t working out the way you thought they would doesn’t make you failure.
There are definitely some emotional parts. When she starts missing Ryan is a big one. I bawled in some areas. What I loved was the humor between Lauren and her brother and sister. They may not have the same relationship choices, but the 3 of them together had me laughing at many times.
Such a great book, and I can’t say enough how much I loved it!
Both Lauren and Ryan are strong-willed people, but sometimes it’s really hard to keep a marriage strong. They do the best thing they can think of without getting a divorce. I think Lauren
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learns the most. She becomes closer to her family, and learns that she can maybe be happy without Ryan. Lauren is so strong in some areas, and completely lost in others. I think that can be expected when you are no longer in the same house as someone you’ve spent most of your adult years with. Lauren struggles with how she feels, and has to work through some emotional issues just to not feel bitter.I love that Lauren has such a strong family connection. Her siblings and mom drive her crazy sometimes, but she loves them fiercely. I also like that each person supports her, but can also give her their opinion on what they think she should do. I do think that Lauren’s biggest hurdle is thinking she is a failure for having a rough go at marriage. It’s not easy, and she begins to understand that. Just because things aren’t working out the way you thought they would doesn’t make you failure.
There are definitely some emotional parts. When she starts missing Ryan is a big one. I bawled in some areas. What I loved was the humor between Lauren and her brother and sister. They may not have the same relationship choices, but the 3 of them together had me laughing at many times.
Such a great book, and I can’t say enough how much I loved it!
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LibraryThing member ToriC90
I finished this book in one night. Definitely recommend for anyone that has ever been in love or has loved before. Especially recommended for anyone who has seen the tough side of loving someone. Charming and sensitive, this book does a great job of approaching a very realistic and common reality
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in a down to earth, honest manner. I also really enjoyed some of the connections the book makes from beginning to end that helps bring the story full circle, in my opinion. Read it! Show Less
LibraryThing member DebbieMcCauley
Lauren and Ryan have been married for years, and are basically just sick of each other. They decide to take a year off with no contact in the hopes of finding out if they can improve things or just end the relationship. Lauren's journey is all about self-discovery and finding out the meaning of
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marriage and relationships. Really well written, this story is about what I believe to be a common occurrence in many relationships, and one way of resolving the stagnation and finding a way back to each other. Insightful. Show Less
LibraryThing member Emma_Manolis
I need to get a copy of this for my shelves. I could relate to so much of this book and could see some aspects of my marriage reflected. Marriage is hard work and sometimes painful. I love that this book shows that marriage isn't always an easy happily ever after.
LibraryThing member dkgarner95
This one gets ALL of the stars but I can't quite tell you why right now because I am too busy trying to mop up my tears.
LibraryThing member bookworm12
A married couple separates for a year when they’re struggling.I loved Lauren’s relationships with her family, especially her supportive sister and feisty grandma. Those relationships helped give the book a bit of depth.
“Isn’t it nice … once you’ve outgrown the ideas of what life should
“The sun will rise no matter what pain we encounter. No matter how much we believe the world to be over, the sun will rise.”
“Why do we do this? Why do we undervalue things when we have them? Why is it only on the verge of losing something that we see how much we need it?”
“Isn’t it nice … once you’ve outgrown the ideas of what life should
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be and you just enjoy what it is.”“The sun will rise no matter what pain we encounter. No matter how much we believe the world to be over, the sun will rise.”
“Why do we do this? Why do we undervalue things when we have them? Why is it only on the verge of losing something that we see how much we need it?”
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LibraryThing member KimMeyer
I really liked this one! My TJR rankings now go Evelyn Hugo > After I Do > One True Loves.
LibraryThing member Danielle.Desrochers
Even though I didn’t like this at all, I’m going to give it 2 stars. It wasn’t badly written or not engaging, it just wasn’t for me.
I really dislike this second chance trope, I hated Ryan and I was so rooting for Lauren to move on and find someone else.
I will read more of her work, just
I really dislike this second chance trope, I hated Ryan and I was so rooting for Lauren to move on and find someone else.
I will read more of her work, just
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maybe not another straight romance? Show Less
LibraryThing member shazjhb
Good book. Easy read. Marriage that takes a year break.
LibraryThing member Danielle.Desrochers
Even though I didn’t like this, I’m going to give it 3 stars. It wasn’t badly written or not engaging, it just wasn’t for me.
I really dislike this second chance trope, I hated Ryan and I was so rooting for Lauren to move on and find someone else.
I will read more of her work, just maybe
Edited: after much thought and review, I've bumped it down to 2 stars.
I really dislike this second chance trope, I hated Ryan and I was so rooting for Lauren to move on and find someone else.
I will read more of her work, just maybe
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not another straight romance?Edited: after much thought and review, I've bumped it down to 2 stars.
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LibraryThing member JillHannah
I thought I'd rated this book already (maybe on Amazon?) it was my first book by this author, but will now definitely read others by her. It is a witty, easy read, but with a deep subplot that will make you think about how easily our views can be swayed in a marriage.
It takes a couple who got along
And what happens when it spirals to the point where you both question if you are better off with or without the other.
It takes a couple who got along
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great, and shows what happens when we start letting every little "quirk" of our spouse get under our skin.And what happens when it spirals to the point where you both question if you are better off with or without the other.
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LibraryThing member DKnight0918
I like it but it took me a long time to finish it. I’ve enjoyed her other books more.
LibraryThing member tjsjohanna
This story has stayed with me beyond the last page. College sweethearts, Lauren & Ryan, started marriage madly in love, but now they actively dislike each other. How did they get there? What will they do about it? The solution is to separate but not divorce. Told mostly from Lauren's point of view,
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the reader gets a story of self discovery and a new level of honesty - with herself, with her family, and ultimately with Ryan. I liked the characters in this story - all of them. And I appreciated the way supporting characters were well developed. Show Less
LibraryThing member bookwyrmm
A fun chick lit filled with great, relatable characters and a main character that you can really root for.
Awards
RUSA CODES Reading List (Shortlist — Women's Fiction — 2015)
Language
Original language
English
Original publication date
2014
Physical description
352 p.; 7.8 inches
ISBN
1398516716 / 9781398516717
Other editions
After I Do by Taylor Jenkins Reid (Paperback)