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Biography & Autobiography. African American Nonfiction. Nonfiction. HTML:An intimate, powerful, and inspiring memoir by the former First Lady of the United States #1 NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER �?� WATCH THE EMMY-NOMINATED NETFLIX ORIGINAL DOCUMENTARY �?� OPRAH�??S BOOK CLUB PICK �?� NAACP IMAGE AWARD WINNER �?� ONE OF ESSENCE�??S 50 MOST IMPACTFUL BLACK BOOKS OF THE PAST 50 YEARS In a life filled with meaning and accomplishment, Michelle Obama has emerged as one of the most iconic and compelling women of our era. As First Lady of the United States of America�??the first African American to serve in that role�??she helped create the most welcoming and inclusive White House in history, while also establishing herself as a powerful advocate for women and girls in the U.S. and around the world, dramatically changing the ways that families pursue healthier and more active lives, and standing with her husband as he led America through some of its most harrowing moments. Along the way, she showed us a few dance moves, crushed Carpool Karaoke, and raised two down-to-earth daughters under an unforgiving media glare. In her memoir, a work of deep reflection and mesmerizing storytelling, Michelle Obama invites readers into her world, chronicling the experiences that have shaped her�??from her childhood on the South Side of Chicago to her years as an executive balancing the demands of motherhood and work, to her time spent at the world�??s most famous address. With unerring honesty and lively wit, she describes her triumphs and her disappointments, both public and private, telling her full story as she has lived it�??in her own words and on her own terms. Warm, wise, and revelatory, Becoming is the deeply personal reckoning of a woman of soul and substance who has steadily defied expectations�??and who… (more)
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Obviously not a book for Trump fans. But if you find yourself longing for the good old days of, say 2015, you'll enjoy this memoir.
Writing this review a couple week's later, what particularly sticks with me, was the flabbergasting revelation of the acrimony between the two American political parties, which paralyzed Congress. The political rivalry was so intense, that the good governance of the country lost out to the sentiment that "blocking the Democrat's proposals was more important than approving funding to hire more teachers and first responders in natural disasters". It is a matter of record that the Republican party goal was for Obama to be a 'one-term' president . How utterly abysmal that prioritizing some possible future ascendancy sacrificed support for the common citizenry.
I highly recommend this memoir for the insights into family life in struggling black American households and then later, for 8 years in the White House. The writing flowed beautifully and was so articulate.
Becoming is divided into three sections:
‘Becoming Me’ – Her youth and her upbringing, her parents striving to give her and her brother the education that would propel them out of the Southside Chicago neighborhood
‘Becoming Us’ – The story of Barack and Michelle, her senior at their law firm to his junior, his eventual entry into politics including state senator, ending at his winning the presidential election. This is the biggest portion as she transitions through multiple cycles, when she finds herself “… becoming a different kind of Mrs. – a Mrs. Defined by the Mr.”
‘Becoming More’ – Her role as the First Lady, or FLoTUS, till their departure from the White House.
Throughout the book, I found effecting insights, especially in the section ‘Becoming More’. I’ve included some in the quotes section below. It’s silly to state the obvious, but I’ll say it anyway. This book won’t turn anyone into her fan, if one had been amongst the mud-slingers. It will affirm positive opinions you may have. She reinforces her stance to NOT run for office in the epilogue of the book. After reading this, everyone will understand why.
I listened to the audiobook for 3/4 of it so I can hear her voice and finished the rest via the physical book to see the photos. I’ll probably still listen to the audiobook for the last portion so I can hear her joy in the triumph of her initiatives and her angst in learning of the pussy-grabbing Cheeto video. Sigh.
Some quotes:
It’s not easy to be outside.
“…If anyone in our family wanted to step outside onto the Truman Balcony – the lovely arcing terrace that overlooked the South Lawn, and the only semiprivate outdoor space we had at the White House – we needed to first alert the Secret Service so that they could shut down the section of E Street that was in view of the balcony, clearing out the flocks of tourists who gathered outside the gates there at all hours of the day and night. There were many times when I thought I’d go out to sit on the balcony, but then reconsidered, realizing the hassle I would cause, the vacations I’d be interrupting, all because I thought it would be nice to have a cup of tea outdoors.”
On Leadership:
“Everything was big and everything was relevant. I read a set of news clips sent by my staff each morning and knew that Barack would be obliged to absorb and respond to every new development. He’d be blamed for things he couldn’t control, pushed to solve frightening problems in faraway nations, expected to plug a hole at the bottom of the ocean. His job, it seemed, was to take the chaos and metabolize it somehow into calm leadership – every day of the week, every week of the year.”
On then 8-year old Sasha:
“…Walking around her classroom at Sidwell’s parents’ night that fall, I’d come across a short ‘What I Did on My Summer Vacation’ essay she’d authored, hanging alongside those of her classmates on one of the walls. ‘I went to Rome and I met the Pope,’ Sasha had written. ‘He was missing part of his thumb.’
I could not tell you what Pope Benedict XVI’s thumb looks like, whether some part of it isn’t there. But we’d taken an observant, matter-of-fact eight-year-old to Rome, Moscow, and Accra, and this is what she’d brought back. Her view of history was, at that point, waist-high.”
On teenager Malia:
“In general, I understood that it was better for all of us not to acknowledge the hate or dwell on the risk, even when others felt compelled to bring it up. Malia would eventually join the high school tennis team at Sidwell, which practiced on the school courts on Wisconsin Avenue. She was there one day when a woman, the mother of another student, approached her, gesturing at the busy road running past the courts. ‘Aren’t you afraid out here?’ she asked.
My daughter, as she grew, was learning to use her voice, discovering her own ways to reinforce the boundaries she needed. ‘If you’re asking me whether I ponder my death every day,’ she said to the woman, as politely as she could, ‘the answer is no.’”
On the underlying efforts and that helping hand – I know this too well:
“There had been so many times in my life when I’d found myself the only woman of color – or even the only woman, period – sitting at a conference table or attending a board meeting or mingling at one VIP gathering or another. If I was the first at some of these things, I wanted to make sure that in the end I wasn’t the only – that others were coming up behind me… The important parts of my story, I was realizing, lay less in the surface value of my accomplishments and more in what undergirded them – the many small ways I’d been buttressed over the years, and the people who’d helped build my confidence over time. I remembered them all, every person who’d ever waved me forward, doing his or her best to inoculate me against the slights and indignities I was certain to encounter in the places I was headed – all those environments built primarily for and by people who were neither black nor female.”
On Nelson Mandela:
“Mandela had gone to jail for his principles. He’d missed seeing his kids grow up, and then he’d missed seeing many of his grandkids grow up, too. All this without bitterness. All this still believing that the better nature of his country would at some point prevail. He’d worked and waited, tolerant and undiscouraged, to see it happen.”
On Gun Violence (in Chicago) – disheartening:
“At one point, one of the social workers interjected, saying to the group, ‘Eighty degrees and sunny! Everyone in the circle began nodding, ruefully. I wasn’t sure why. ‘Tell Mrs. Obama,’ she said, ‘What goes through your mind when you wake up in the morning and hear the weather forecast is eighty and sunny?’
She clearly knew the answer, but wanted me to hear it.
A day like that, the Harper students all agreed, was no good. When the weather was nice, the gangs got more active and the shooting got worse.”
On Racial Injustice:
“…For more than six years now, Barack and I had lived with an awareness that we ourselves were a provocation. As minorities across the country were gradually beginning to take on more significant roles in politics, business, and entertainment, our family had become the most prominent example. Our presence in the White House had been celebrated by millions of Americans, but it also contributed to a reactionary sense of fear and resentment among others. The hatred was old and deep and as dangerous as ever.”
On Misogyny and the expression ‘Death by a Thousand Cuts’:
“…I’d been mocked and threatened many times now, cut down for being black, female, and vocal. I’d felt the derision directed at my body, the literal space I occupied in the world. I’d watched Donald Trump stalk Hillary Clinton during a debate, following her around as she spoke, standing too close, trying to diminish her presence with his. I can hurt you and get away with it. Women endure entire lifetimes of these indignities – in the form of catcalls, groping, assault, oppression. These things injure us. They sap our strength. Some of the cuts are so small they’re barely visible. Others are huge and gaping, leaving scars that never heal. Either way, they accumulate. We carry them everywhere, to and from school and work, at home while raising our children, at our places of worship, anytime we try to advance.”
On ‘Becoming’:
“For me, becoming isn’t about arriving somewhere or achieving a certain aim. I see it instead as forward motion, a means of evolving, a way to reach continuously toward a better self. The journey doesn’t end. I became a mother, but I still have a lot to learn from and give to my children. I became a wife, but I continue to adapt to and be humbled by what it means to truly love and make a life with another person. I have become, by certain measures, a person of power, and yet there are moments still when I feel insure or unheard.
It's all a process, steps along a path. Becoming requires equal parts patience and rigor. Becoming is never giving up on the idea that there’s more growing to be done.”
- She really didn't want it - the presidency, and its impact on her family.
- She is so, so, so devoted to her daughters.
- She loves Barack.
- Barack is a great guy, and so, so, so devoted to his daughters.
Extraordinary parenting under extraordinary circumstances.
And the other major
Quibbles? Maybe Barack comes across as a little TOO perfect here, but, see point three. She is - they are - obviously still in love. She mentions the little "fist bump" she once gave him during some nationally televised appearance, and I remember it - such an intimate little moment.
And hey, maybe he IS perfect. Sure holding up as pretty well, as a president, in hindsight, and in comparison.
I liked this book because of its honesty, intelligence, and respect and love for her parents, and older brother, and her humble origins. She shares her personal feelings about many experiences good and bad. She is loyal to her friends and colleagues, optimistic and hopeful, and most importantly a loving, caring daughter, wife, and mother.
Excellent; inspiring and thoughtful.
She also talks about being a working mother, being a list-driven, step-by-step sort of person in a chaotic sort of world, and is incredibly honest. As a person who has had a career for a while but has only had a child for two years, I felt like I was getting advice I could really use.
I straight-up love this book. It's great.
My favorite thing about the book was her descriptions of Barack, and her analysis of them as a couple. The two are so different, but with mutual respect were able to pull it off. Barack being the dreamer, the ambitious one, always running late; Michelle with a more conventional outlook, very focused on achievement and organization. It seems that they rubbed off a little on each other, so that Michelle was able to leave corporate law for public service, which was a much better fit for her; and Barack, obviously, benefited from Michelle's solidness.
And this is at the heart of why I enjoyed Michelle Obama's memoir as much as I did. In It she more than just a summary of her life from her childhood on the South Side of Chicago to her years as the First Lady of the United States, but an introspective assessment of what it meant to her. It helps that she writes in a clear and eloquent style with touches of inspiration scattered throughout, as it does that she has no detailed political agenda to promote or a governing legacy to defend. Yet even with these factors taken into consideration there is a real power in her writing, thanks to her candidness about the challenges she faced and how she dealt with them. She conveys a great sense of sincerity in its pages, which comes through best in her self-assessments and the love she feels for her husband and her daughters. While the selectiveness is there (she leaves out certain subjects, such as her time in law school), it's subtle enough to be missed in the flow of her narrative. More importantly, though, is that it feels sincere in a way few memoirists, even candid ones, can achieve successfully. It serves as a powerful reminder of the classiness she exhibited as the First Lady and the good fortune we all enjoyed by having her as a part of American public life.
I loved reading about her early childhood and seeing a more in depth look at her life before Obama. I have always thought she was smart and poised, and it appears shes a great writer too. She told her story much in the same way she has lived her public life; beautifully. She did not shy away from being honest when needed, and did not try and downplay her successes and talents.
The only thing that kept from giving the memoir 5 stars was the lack of depth that were written about her more current years and the presidency. For the most part it felt more biography then memoir. This happened, then this happened, and this is how I felt about it.
She didn't really let down the walls or write anything that might make her appear vulnerable. There were no, oh my God I never would have known, moments. For that, the narrative dragged at times. I was hoping for a little more. More of her! I wanted to know more about how she truly felt about people, and would have loved the book to focus more on her thoughts, emotions and insight instead of her day to day this is what I did telling.
Overall, however, i think the book only reinforces how amazing a woman she is and how lucky we were to have such a dignified and wonderful first lady.
It feels even more sad now, with the current climate after finishing this knowing that the Obama's are no longer there, working towards something good.
I hope there is so much more of Michelle to come. I hope she and her husband continue to do their part in progressing the country. I've always been a huge fan of hers and always admired her. Her memoir only helps reinforce that!
Obama is refreshingly candid, especially when sharing her initial feelings about her husband’s political aspirations, and the media backlash during the presidential campaign and their time in the White House. With a few notable yet extremely tactful exceptions, she refrains from negative comment on the opposing party and the current administration. She is consistently purposeful yet human; there were several times I choked up and got teary-eyed. I’m sure we haven’t seen the last of the Obamas, and am confident they will continue having a positive impact on the country, and perhaps beyond.
That was, for me, a pretty provocative opening statement; I generally try to maintain a somewhat neutral facade, though I'll never deny my personal truths. I just don't feel it's necessary to wave them like a flag. But - and this is relevant, so stay with me - my defences are low at the moment and I'm so damned tired of everybody's anger being channeled into tribalism. "Liberals" pointing fingers at "Conservatives" and tearing strips off the whole lot, tarring them all with the same brush, and "Conservatives" ... when they're not tearing a strip off the "Liberals" and tarring them with the same brush, they're actively letting their inner child out, gleefully being petty and sniggering as they throw mud. Bunch of damn fools, the entire dammed lot, and honestly, they all deserve one another.
As I said before, I am conservatively bent; I am not deficit inclined, nor am I inclined to embrace a lot of government in general (though there are exceptions - hello banking industry; you, you aren't to be trusted with so much as a plugged nickel). Neither am I a racist, a bigot, nor an elitist. I don't hate, nor do I deny poor people; their existence or their right to make a better life. Anyone who knows me knows all of this, yet I don't think I'm ever getting the tar out of my hair. I believe in diversity in all things, even diverse opinions. Even the ones I don't like.
Now, this is how I make all that relevant - Michelle Obama has written a book that succeeds, and is brilliant, because she does not fling mud; she does not tar anybody; she writes about her thoughts, her beliefs, her values, her opinions, without ever once throwing judgements on anyone else's. She does not build herself up by tearing down others, and here I think it's important to point out that she's not Suzy Sunshine and there aren't any unicorns flying out her backside. I found what she didn't say to be as provocative as what she does say is not; moments when she chooses her words carefully, and where, in my opinion, she manages to convey that which perhaps she feels she can't say. Though I admit, that might be wishful thinking on my part.
I've always admired President Obama; from the first he struck me as thoughtful, intelligent, and well-balanced with very little ego (or one that thrived on power, anyway), but at the beginning, Michelle was a bit of a non-entity to me. Mostly because I've never gotten into what any First Lady was doing; she's not in office, has no public mandate, and is therefore of little interest to me. But Michelle caught my attention with the organic vegetable garden - an initiative I was thrilled to watch unfold and succeed. I still paid little attention, but every time she appeared on my radar, it was because she was doing something impressive, and doing it with dignity and grace. By the time his second term ended, I was sorry to see them both go, and I was eager to read this book when it came out, to learn more about this woman who has never done anything but impress me.
A little part of my soul died when she stated for the record her complete disinterest in public office, because these are the kind of people I want running my country. NOT because of their politics - I like both of them, but their politics are not entirely mine - but because of the people they are. I don't have to agree with everything my leader does, but I do have to be able to respect him (or her) and their dedication to the process of doing what's best for the people - all the people - of the country. The Obamas set - or reset - the standard for the highest office in the nation, repairing the damage wrought by so many previous administrations. To bring this back to the book - Becoming gives readers an insight into just how deeply invested they both were - but especially Michelle, since this is her story - in making the most of the incredible opportunities they were given to make positive, lasting change for as many people as they could, while keeping their family not just in tact, but healthy, thriving and close.
A note about her narration: I'm not going to gush, because the truth is that it was apparent that she was told to read slowly and exactly off the manuscript, which is fair enough. But I sort of wish she'd have been confident enough to read it in the voice she obviously wrote it in; occasionally that voice would sneak through just enough that I just knew, had she been able to be totally herself, it would have kicked the narration up a notch into absolute perfection. But that's not a criticism - she did a phenomenal job and for anyone interested in this book who can do audiobooks, I'd highly recommend it, as I think it adds depth to hear her tell her own story.
Michelle Obama shares her life, from the love and support of her extensive family on the Southside of Chicago
through her meeting as advisor to Barack Obama, their marriage and the birth of their children and on into
the eight years with The
With deep insight and honesty, she sets forward the good, the bad, the hurt, the joy, the triumphs, and the pain.
It would have been welcome if one of the dogs had been a Rescue, if
The scope and pace of the
Obama grew up as a lower-middle-class Chicagoan. This being the case, her professional path was "unswerving," to use her terminology. She went to Harvard Law, and went on a partner-track path at a law firm in Chicago. She didn't allow herself to realize she didn't enjoy this work, and never had, until her late twenties, after meeting Barack while he was an intern at her firm.
Given this conservatism, it is understandable the Obama fails to rise to occasion presented by her historic positioning, as the first black First Lady. Although racism (and occasionally sexism) are a backdrop of the text, they never become anything more than that. Despite her speaking to the misogyny and racism of Trump in the end of the book, even this provocation fails to evoke a strong stance.
Having been friends with the daughter of Jesse Jackson, the 1980's black Democratic candidate for President, and having been married by Reverend Jeremiah Wright—both figures aligned with a radical black power platform—it is unfortunate that the Obama's didn't take up their chance to fight for racial equity in the US. One might counter that they didn't have the political collateral for such a move, but neither did Barack's hallmark legislative package—the Affordable Care Act. Obama continues this legacy of striving for social acceptability over justice in her memoir. She would be the first to admit her substantial concern for the opinions of others. The Obama's made the decision to establish themselves as insiders, a place they're more than happy to disdain.
Another thread in the narrative is Obama's disdain for politics, and her emphasis on mothering. At every step of the way, she resisted Barack's ascent. I'm unsure how to interpret these stances. Although I'm understanding of her disdain for the demands of political life, and the fact that she might feel mothering is her most important vocation, maybe Obama regrets her lack of success of the Obama administration, and justifies these regrets with her alibi that she never wanted such a path in the first place.
In conclusion, the book is alright. I would attribute its extreme popularity to the combination of a Trump-induced nostalgia for more neoliberal times, and to the rise of the Me Too movement. It's worth reading at our present moment in the arc of history, but likely won't endure the test of time.
The courtship of their endearing relationship and dedication to maintaining it, along with the parenting of their daughters is inspiring to the utmost level. The unending desire to help, to remedy, to fight for a broader good, from them both, is so incredible in a me-me-me society. The divulging of intimate events in their lives is more than expected and welcome in times of dishonest secrecy.
I was amazed at all that went on in the White House and how restrictive their roles were. I was also shocked that things like their food, clothing, even toilet paper were bought with their own money. Making humor out of constant attention from everyone and the ever-present secret service must have been daunting. How the couldn't even enjoy a single dinner out without disrupting an entire city.
There is just so much to this book that gives us a broader respect and admiration for this bigger than life couple. Oh how I miss them representing our country.
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Disappointingly vanilla (no skeletons in this closet), but got more interesting towards the end. Makes you think about how women get consumed into men's lives.