Status
Available
Call number
Publication
WmMorrowPB (2008), Edition: 1st Edition, 272 pages
Description
He says that's his best offer. Is it? She says she agrees. Does she? The interview went great-or did it? He said he'd never do it again. But he did. Read this book and send your nonverbal intelligence soaring. Joe Navarro, a former FBI counterintelligence officer and a recognized expert on nonverbal behavior, explains how to "speed-read" people: decode sentiments and behaviors, avoid hidden pitfalls, and look for deceptive behaviors. You'll also learn how your body language can influence what your boss, family, friends, and strangers think of you. You will discover: The ancient survival instincts that drive body language Why the face is the least likely place to gauge a person's true feelings What thumbs, feet, and eyelids reveal about moods and motives The most powerful behaviors that reveal our confidence and true sentiments Simple nonverbals that instantly establish trust Simple nonverbals that instantly communicate authority Filled with examples from Navarro's professional experience, this definitive book offers a powerful new way to navigate your world.… (more)
User reviews
LibraryThing member DE_Blog
Written by a former FBI counterintelligence officer who first became an expert in nonverbal communication as a non-English speaking child immigrant from Cuba to the U.S. before using it to catch countless criminals, What Every Body Is Saying is one of the books you’ll hear most often recommended
As you read through this summary, it is often helpful to act out the body language yourself, both to understand exactly what it is and recognize it in others, and to give yourself a mental note so you can identify when you unconsciously exhibit it yourself.
1. & 2. Mastering the Secrets of Nonverbal Communication & Living Our Own Limbic Legacy
The author repeats the often-quoted statistic that nonverbal behavior is 60 to 65% of all communication. He explains why this is through a concept known as triune brain theory, which classifies our mind into the three areas of the reptilian brain (stem), mammalian brain (limbic), and human brain (neocortex). While the classification is not technically accurate, it is useful in conceptualizing how our minds control our actions. This book is primarily concerned with the mammalian brain, which controls most expression of our nonverbal behavior. The key here is to understand that everything we do, even the most seemingly insignificant scratch or lean, is directed by some portion of the brain. By observing these behaviors, we can learn to interpret what the mammalian brain is communicating.
The communications of the limbic system are extremely reliable because they operate outside of our conscious thought, showing our true response to our environment. In fact, there are only three responses to distress or threats that humans have: freeze, flight, and fight. We express these responses differently than our hunter-gatherer ancestors, but the way our brains react has not changed.
Examples of the freeze response:
-Someone being chastised will become very still
-Someone being interviewed will often exhibit shallow breathing
-Shoplifters will subconsciously try to hide their physical presence by keeping their arms close by their side and hunching slightly
Examples of the flight response (distancing nonverbal behaviors):
-Leaning away from the table
-Placing an object on your lap
-Turning your feet toward the nearest exit
-Closing or rubbing your eyes
-Putting your hand on your face
Examples of the fight response:
-Puffing out your chest
-Violating personal space
-Aggressive posture
These three types of limbic responses are often followed by pacifying behaviors, which are representative of the brain directing the body to provide comforting actions in order to calm down and restore normal conditions. By observing these pacifying behaviors, you can detect when someone has reacted negatively to some situation – perhaps something you have said or done.
Examples of pacifying behaviors:
-Covering the neck, such as playing with a necklace or adjusting a tie
-Rubbing your forehead
-Touching or rubbing your neck
-Touching or rubbing your cheek
-Exhaling with your cheeks puffed out
-The “leg cleanser” – when sitting, pushing your hands from the top of your legs toward your knees
-The “ventilator” – pulling on your shirt collar (for men) or tossing the back of your hair up (for women)
There are many more examples, often involving touching your face, neck, or hair, and sometimes things like whistling or excessive yawning. These behaviors indicate that someone is uneasy or stressed about something, and while the cause is not always straightforward (e.g., these aren’t guaranteed indicators of lying), they are helpful because people generally think nothing of them and make no conscious effort to hide them.
3. Getting a Leg Up on Body Language: Nonverbals of the Feet and Legs
The author then begins to go into detail about various nonverbal communication, starting with the feet because they are actually the most “honest” part of the body, and the easiest to read. He attributes this to the fact that the feet are usually the first body part to be engaged by the freeze, flight, or fight limbic response. This is in direct contrast to how we are used to reading people, which is from the face down. By learning to reverse the process, you will find it to be much easier to read people.
Another reason that the feet are the most honest part of the body is that since childhood, most people’s efforts to disguise their emotions or intentions have always focused on the face. Think about some common parental reprimands: “Fix your face,” or “At least look happy when your cousins stop by.” Most people have given comparatively little attention from their neocortexes to their feet.
1. “Happy feet”. Bouncing or wiggling your feet often indicates excitement or satisfaction. Be careful, though; this behavior can also communicate impatience. Like most nonverbal signals, you must understand the behavior in its context. While you can’t always see someone’s feet, this movement will show in their torso or shoulders even when they are sitting.
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for learning how to decode body language. Expanding your ability to decode body language is an incredibly important factor in your capacity to deduce motivations in others or establish trust with them – and perhaps more importantly, it is an invaluable skill to use certain body language yourself to do things such as communicate authority or feel more confident.As you read through this summary, it is often helpful to act out the body language yourself, both to understand exactly what it is and recognize it in others, and to give yourself a mental note so you can identify when you unconsciously exhibit it yourself.
1. & 2. Mastering the Secrets of Nonverbal Communication & Living Our Own Limbic Legacy
The author repeats the often-quoted statistic that nonverbal behavior is 60 to 65% of all communication. He explains why this is through a concept known as triune brain theory, which classifies our mind into the three areas of the reptilian brain (stem), mammalian brain (limbic), and human brain (neocortex). While the classification is not technically accurate, it is useful in conceptualizing how our minds control our actions. This book is primarily concerned with the mammalian brain, which controls most expression of our nonverbal behavior. The key here is to understand that everything we do, even the most seemingly insignificant scratch or lean, is directed by some portion of the brain. By observing these behaviors, we can learn to interpret what the mammalian brain is communicating.
The communications of the limbic system are extremely reliable because they operate outside of our conscious thought, showing our true response to our environment. In fact, there are only three responses to distress or threats that humans have: freeze, flight, and fight. We express these responses differently than our hunter-gatherer ancestors, but the way our brains react has not changed.
Examples of the freeze response:
-Someone being chastised will become very still
-Someone being interviewed will often exhibit shallow breathing
-Shoplifters will subconsciously try to hide their physical presence by keeping their arms close by their side and hunching slightly
Examples of the flight response (distancing nonverbal behaviors):
-Leaning away from the table
-Placing an object on your lap
-Turning your feet toward the nearest exit
-Closing or rubbing your eyes
-Putting your hand on your face
Examples of the fight response:
-Puffing out your chest
-Violating personal space
-Aggressive posture
These three types of limbic responses are often followed by pacifying behaviors, which are representative of the brain directing the body to provide comforting actions in order to calm down and restore normal conditions. By observing these pacifying behaviors, you can detect when someone has reacted negatively to some situation – perhaps something you have said or done.
Examples of pacifying behaviors:
-Covering the neck, such as playing with a necklace or adjusting a tie
-Rubbing your forehead
-Touching or rubbing your neck
-Touching or rubbing your cheek
-Exhaling with your cheeks puffed out
-The “leg cleanser” – when sitting, pushing your hands from the top of your legs toward your knees
-The “ventilator” – pulling on your shirt collar (for men) or tossing the back of your hair up (for women)
There are many more examples, often involving touching your face, neck, or hair, and sometimes things like whistling or excessive yawning. These behaviors indicate that someone is uneasy or stressed about something, and while the cause is not always straightforward (e.g., these aren’t guaranteed indicators of lying), they are helpful because people generally think nothing of them and make no conscious effort to hide them.
3. Getting a Leg Up on Body Language: Nonverbals of the Feet and Legs
The author then begins to go into detail about various nonverbal communication, starting with the feet because they are actually the most “honest” part of the body, and the easiest to read. He attributes this to the fact that the feet are usually the first body part to be engaged by the freeze, flight, or fight limbic response. This is in direct contrast to how we are used to reading people, which is from the face down. By learning to reverse the process, you will find it to be much easier to read people.
Another reason that the feet are the most honest part of the body is that since childhood, most people’s efforts to disguise their emotions or intentions have always focused on the face. Think about some common parental reprimands: “Fix your face,” or “At least look happy when your cousins stop by.” Most people have given comparatively little attention from their neocortexes to their feet.
1. “Happy feet”. Bouncing or wiggling your feet often indicates excitement or satisfaction. Be careful, though; this behavior can also communicate impatience. Like most nonverbal signals, you must understand the behavior in its context. While you can’t always see someone’s feet, this movement will show in their torso or shoulders even when they are sitting.
Show Less
LibraryThing member nsikub
What Everybody Is Saying: An Ex-FBI Agent's Guide to Speed-Reading People is a book that opens your eyes to the very things about body language you already know. It is easy to read even the not-so avid readers could just take a couple of days or so to complete the entire book. Yet, in the end you
In the book, Navarro demonstrates several types of body languages in pictorial format and then correlates those postures with real-life FBI past experience making his arguments even more convincing! He conveniently highlights his life experiences as an FBI agent in separate boxes over many pages bringing the tapestry of human experience in all of its delightful complexity. Some of these experiences may seem over the top, but I would like to think they are real.
As much as this book seems popular it is worth noting that it covers complex issues some of which have no scientific evidence due to the fuzzy nature of the topic. At least, Navarro admits to this and I give him credit for his plethora of bibliography! For example, what may be a good gesture to one may not be to another depending on several factors such as culture, religion, ethnicity to mention, but a few. However, what is good about this book when you read it is that you realise that there is nothing new about body language. In fact, most of what is explained is common knowledge and experience that anyone at some point in life might have come across consciously or sub-consciously.
Broadly speaking, Navarro splits the nonverbal behaviours into two categories on the basis of human-consciousness - those controlled by the neocortex [conscious] and the limbic part of our brain [sub-conscious]. Most of Navarro's illustrations in this book are based around the limbic part of the brain, which in essence has no control of the human brain. I believe this stance is what gives Navarro the flexibility to stretch his arguments as much as he likes, because he knows there are no right or wrong answers in his approach.
So, find out for yourself if this man with a distinguished twenty-five year career with the FBI is what he claims to be - a human lie detector that can spot deceit with relative ease and even teach you to become a personal polygraph in short order. One thing for certain this book will do as it has done to me, is put you on the spot-light and be aware of your surroundings than ever before!
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feel as though you have achieved and understood the nonverbal behaviour with a better view of the world around you - able to see most of what we take for granted in everyday life.In the book, Navarro demonstrates several types of body languages in pictorial format and then correlates those postures with real-life FBI past experience making his arguments even more convincing! He conveniently highlights his life experiences as an FBI agent in separate boxes over many pages bringing the tapestry of human experience in all of its delightful complexity. Some of these experiences may seem over the top, but I would like to think they are real.
As much as this book seems popular it is worth noting that it covers complex issues some of which have no scientific evidence due to the fuzzy nature of the topic. At least, Navarro admits to this and I give him credit for his plethora of bibliography! For example, what may be a good gesture to one may not be to another depending on several factors such as culture, religion, ethnicity to mention, but a few. However, what is good about this book when you read it is that you realise that there is nothing new about body language. In fact, most of what is explained is common knowledge and experience that anyone at some point in life might have come across consciously or sub-consciously.
Broadly speaking, Navarro splits the nonverbal behaviours into two categories on the basis of human-consciousness - those controlled by the neocortex [conscious] and the limbic part of our brain [sub-conscious]. Most of Navarro's illustrations in this book are based around the limbic part of the brain, which in essence has no control of the human brain. I believe this stance is what gives Navarro the flexibility to stretch his arguments as much as he likes, because he knows there are no right or wrong answers in his approach.
So, find out for yourself if this man with a distinguished twenty-five year career with the FBI is what he claims to be - a human lie detector that can spot deceit with relative ease and even teach you to become a personal polygraph in short order. One thing for certain this book will do as it has done to me, is put you on the spot-light and be aware of your surroundings than ever before!
Show Less
LibraryThing member Miro
The author is an ex-FBI agent, and in this interesting book he explains how to detect if a person is lying. He looks for bodily reactions to pointed questioning and argues that particular limbic reactions are almost impossible to fake.
He explains that it needs training, and usefully shows the
The only other book that I've read on the subject is Charles Darwin's "The Expression of Emotions in Man and Animals" but I found Navarro's book more enjoyable since it's crime focused and finer tuned.
He explains that it needs training, and usefully shows the
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error of taking voluminous speech to represent truthfulness and unease to represent deception.The only other book that I've read on the subject is Charles Darwin's "The Expression of Emotions in Man and Animals" but I found Navarro's book more enjoyable since it's crime focused and finer tuned.
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LibraryThing member stevetempo
Excellent in insight into non-verbal communication from an expert. I especially enjoyed his associated experiences with specific "tells" (non-verbal communication).
LibraryThing member bicyclewriter
Educational. Learned a lot about what's behind common body language. Wanders around quite a bit - I like this sort of non-fiction to be a bit more well-organized for future reference.
LibraryThing member Cheryl_in_CC_NV
I suppose some people are masters of body language already, or have learned this stuff so long ago that it seems like common-sense to them, but I'm enjoying it and also feeling like I'm learning something. You'd have to read it yourself to know if there's anything you don't already know.
I'm sure
I enjoyed reading it even though I have no immediate need of it. Navarro's amiable and lucid explanatory tone is pleasing, the photos are clear, and the examples illuminating. I also appreciate that the book is well-organized and includes bibliography and index. I just hope bad guys don't study it.
I'm sure
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people who are socially awkward would benefit from this, whether or not they have Asperger's or are neuro-typical. And should I ever again find myself in a position to need this kind of advice, I will definitely seek this book out. If you're in the dating pool, having trouble with your teens, trying to succeed at job interviews, or otherwise need to communicate using non-verbals as well as words, especially with someone whose complete honesty you are unsure of, I recommend this.I enjoyed reading it even though I have no immediate need of it. Navarro's amiable and lucid explanatory tone is pleasing, the photos are clear, and the examples illuminating. I also appreciate that the book is well-organized and includes bibliography and index. I just hope bad guys don't study it.
Show Less
LibraryThing member ecataldi
Pretty fascinating book. I'm pretty good at reading other peoples non-verbal cues but HORRIBLE at realizing what my own are. I'm sure I'm the most expressive person ever and I'm sure my body language betrays me all the time. Reading this book just helped me understand why we act and move the way we
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do even though we're not even aware we're doing it. Each chapter breaks down a different section of the body and how to speed read someone's mood, tell if they're lying, nervous, happy, or uncomfortable based off subtle body movements. I learned the most on the section about feet, they're one of the most expressive parts of your body and also one of the most overlooked. Feet placement can be very indicative of a person's true emotions. Overall an interesting and enlightening read; full of information that I've already started putting to use. Show Less
Subjects
Language
Original language
English
Physical description
272 p.; 9 inches
ISBN
9780061438295