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Psychology. Sociology. Nonfiction. HTML:#1 NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER � REESE�S BOOK CLUB PICK � A timely and important book that challenges everything we think we know about cultivating true belonging in our communities, organizations, and culture, from the #1 bestselling author of Rising Strong, Daring Greatly, and The Gifts of Imperfection Don�t miss the five-part HBO Max docuseries Bren� Brown: Atlas of the Heart! �True belonging doesn�t require us to change who we are. It requires us to be who we are.� Social scientist Bren� Brown, PhD, MSW, has sparked a global conversation about the experiences that bring meaning to our lives�experiences of courage, vulnerability, love, belonging, shame, and empathy. In Braving the Wilderness, Brown redefines what it means to truly belong in an age of increased polarization. With her trademark mix of research, storytelling, and honesty, Brown will again change the cultural conversation while mapping a clear path to true belonging. Brown argues that we�re experiencing a spiritual crisis of disconnection, and introduces four practices of true belonging that challenge everything we believe about ourselves and each other. She writes, �True belonging requires us to believe in and belong to ourselves so fully that we can find sacredness both in being a part of something and in standing alone when necessary. But in a culture that�s rife with perfectionism and pleasing, and with the erosion of civility, it�s easy to stay quiet, hide in our ideological bunkers, or fit in rather than show up as our true selves and brave the wilderness of uncertainty and criticism. But true belonging is not something we negotiate or accomplish with others; it�s a daily practice that demands integrity and authenticity. It�s a personal commitment that we carry in our hearts.� Brown offers us the clarity and courage we need to find our way back to ourselves and to each other. And that path cuts right through the wilderness. Brown writes, �The wilderness is an untamed, unpredictable place of solitude and searching. It is a place as dangerous as it is breathtaking, a place as sought after as it is feared. But it turns out to be the place of true belonging, and it�s the bravest and most sacred place you will ever stand.�.… (more)
User reviews
“I can confidently say that stories of pain and courage almost always include two things: praying and cussing. Sometimes at the exact same time.”
I love the blurb "True belonging doesn't require us to change who we are. It requires us to be who we are." Nota bene - the book includes Notes and Index.
Brene Brown gathers data and
Taking up the quest to belong, the author dug into what we mean by "trust" and finds seven elements that are useful in both trusting others and ourselves. [38-40] I like her acronym BRAVING: Boundaries - respect them; Reliability - deliver and don't overpromise; Accountability - own your mistakes; Vault - keep confidences; Integrity - choose courage and correctness; Nonjudgment - we can talk about what we need and feel; Generosity - be generous of interpretation.
Professor Brown concludes: "There will be times when standing alone feels too hard, too scary, and we'll doubt our ability to make our way through the uncertainty. Someone, somewhere, will say, "Don't do it. You don't have what it takes to survive the wilderness." This is when you reach deep into your wild heart and remind yourself, "I AM the wilderness."
Braving the Wilderness was only published at the end of 2017 so Brene Brown refers to recent world events, culture and society. This is as much a guide to dealing with the current negativity, lack of integrity and fake news and politic lies as it is about finding true belonging. It talks about how to deal with it and how to stay connected in a positive healthy way.
The section headings are advice on their own:
People are hard to hate close up. Move in.
Speak truth to bullshit. Be civil.
Hold hands. With strangers.
Strong back. Soft front. Wild Heart.
I would recommend this book to anyone struggling in today's world, and trying to find a way to cope with the overwhelming amount of noise it creates in our day to day lives.
The wilderness metaphor didn't especially resonate with me, and so sometimes I found myself wondering what exactly she was talking about. She writes: "Belonging so fully to yourself that you’re willing to stand alone is a wilderness—an untamed, unpredictable place of solitude and searching." She adds that "the special courage it takes to experience true belonging is not just about braving the wilderness, it’s about becoming the wilderness. It’s about breaking down the walls, abandoning our ideological bunkers, and living from our wild heart rather than our weary hurt." "Someone, somewhere, will say, 'Don’t do it. You don’t have what it takes to survive the wilderness. This is when you reach deep into your wild heart and remind yourself, 'I am the wilderness.'" I think Brene Brown is wonderful, but I'm still reading those lines and thinking huh?!? Maybe I'm just a bit too concrete.
That's not to say that all of it was lost on me. When she wrote "cynicism and distrust have a stranglehold on our hearts", I felt like she could easily have been speaking about my own heart. She tells us that in order to achieve true belonging, we must be vulnerable and have the courage to take on difficult things and be uncomfortable. I liked her observation that when we're bullshitting, "the truth doesn’t matter, what I think matters."
The book is focused around four key approaches to improve belonging:
People Are Hard to Hate Close Up. Move In.
Speak Truth to Bullshit. Be Civil.
Hold Hands. With Strangers.
Strong Back. Soft Front. Wild Heart.
The book contains many useful nuggets of advice, including practicing gratitude and breaking the habit of seeking confirmation that we're not good enough. There are also many common sense ideas that are perhaps not so common, such as approaching conflict with a genuine attempt to understand the other person's perspective. While boundaries may seem like a challenge sometimes, Brown takes the perspective that establishing and sticking to clear boundaries in conflict actually promotes compassion and belonging. Boundaries are the first ingredient in her BRAVING acronym for facing the wilderness.
While there was definitely good stuff there, I have to say that for me this book was a bit of a disappointment. I'm a big Brene Brown fan, and I like what she has to say, particularly about vulnerability, but the wilderness metaphor just didn't do it for me. I definitely want to read more of her work, though.
In this book, Brown teaches us what it means to truly belong, meaning that true belonging
To guide us through the wilderness, Brown shares these four behavioral practices:
1. People are hard to hate close up. Move in.
2. Speak truth to bullshit. Be civil.
3. Hold hands. With strangers.
4. Strong back. Soft front. Wild heart.
She delves into each practice, offering real-life stories that drive her point home. As always, Brown is a master storyteller, and her anecdotes will move you.
My three takeaways:
#1: We are much more than our political ideologies.
When we lean into each other’s humanity, we see our greater connectedness. I’m a Democrat, but I am also a mom, wife, daughter, sister, Tampa Bay Bucs fan, entrepreneur, lover of flamingos, and animal advocate. I have travel anxieties and a restless spirit, and often stick my foot in my mouth. I am so much more than my political ideology – as are my friends, neighbors, colleagues, and, yes, politicians.
#2: Social media is wonderful for connecting, but it’s the face-to-face interactions that create the strong bonds.
Don’t let online relationships transcend the in-person ones. I took this as a personal reminder (as an entrepreneur: Have in-person events, Jill. Deepen those bonds with your community even more (this is something I’ve been avoiding).
#3: Once you step into the wilderness, you are not ever alone.
The others who have stepped into the forest are there too. Have faith in yourself. Have faith in your beliefs. And stay kind.
How Braving The Wilderness relates to entrepreneurs
I am a firm believer in entrepreneurs using their marketing platforms to advance their causes. Furthermore, I believe female entrepreneurs are the changemakers that will shepherd us to a better world.
Therefore, female entrepreneurs must learn to brave the wilderness, even if it means upsetting someone. We must stand in our authentic selves, knowing that our community will love and support us. This includes our ideal clients, who I define as those people who buy from us and believe in our causes.
This is scary as hell, but it’s necessary. Braving The Wilderness is our guide book on how to navigate this scary-as-hell path.
I encourage entrepreneurs, especially females, to read Braving The Wilderness to help them lean into more authenticity and vulnerability. Translate what Brown says into your marketing, and you have struck marketing gold.
Biggest takeaway: Life is all about connection and compassion. Yes.
- People are hard to hate Close Up – Move in.
- Speak truth to bullshit. Be civil. Hold hands with strangers,
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I love this quote she uses by Joseph Campbell: “If you see your path laid out in front of you, you know it’s not your path. Your own path you make with every step you take.”
I'm looking forward to reading her newest book [Atlas of the Heart].
This book would Work Well in church groups, therapy groups, maybe even work teams.
She addresses the importance of standing up for yourself
They finally wore down my resistance and I gave Brene Brown a chance.
Know what? I actually found a few commonalities with the author.
In Braving the Wilderness she discusses the
I’ve already put a hold on my next book by Ms.Brown.