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Library Notes
2. Available as an audiobook at: https://www.audible.ca/search?keywords=Will+I+Ever+Be+Good+Enough%3F%3A+Healing+...
Description
The first book specifically for daughters suffering from the emotional abuse of selfish, self-involved mothers, Will I Ever Be Good Enough? provides the expert assistance you need in order to overcome this debilitating history and reclaim your life for yourself. Drawing on over two decades of experience as a therapist specializing in women's psychology and health, psychotherapist Dr. Karyl McBride helps you recognize the widespread effects of this maternal emotional abuse and guides you as you create an individualized program for self-protection, resolution, and complete recovery.Narcissistic mothers teach their daughters that love is not unconditional, that it is given only when they behave in accordance with maternal expectations and whims. As adults, these daughters have difficulty overcoming feelings of inadequacy, disappointment, emotional emptiness, and sadness. They may also have a fear of abandonment that leads them to form unhealthy romantic relationships, as well as a tendency to perfectionism and unrelenting self-criticism or to self-sabotage and frustration. Dr. McBride's step-by-step program will enable you to:-1) Recognize your own experience with maternal narcissism and its effects on all aspects of your life-2) Discover how you have internalized verbal and nonverbal messages from your mother and how these have translated into overachievement or self-sabotage-3) Construct a personalized program to take control of your life and enhance your sense of self, establishing healthy boundaries with your mother and breaking the legacy of abuseWarm and sympathetic, Dr. McBride brings a profound level of authority to Will I Ever Be Good Enough? that encourages and inspires you as it aids your recovery.… (more)
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User reviews
I was able to appreciate that I
Unfortunately, I didn’t get much out of the book, probably because though I felt emotionally ignored, not seen or understood by my own mother, evidently she was not
The author lists nine traits of a narcissistic personality, 1) has a grandiose sense of self-importance 2) is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, etc 3) believes that he or she is special 4) requires excessive admiration 5) has a sense of entitlement 6) takes advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends 7) lacks empathy 8) is often envious of others or believes others are envious of him/her 9) shows arrogance.
These traits are exhibited through behaviour that says “It’s all about me” and “You’re not good enough”.
The daughter of a narcissistic mother feels unloved - “If my own mother can’t love me, who can?”
Karyl McBride has identified six types of narcissistic mothers, which she calls “the six faces”.
These are 1) the flamboyant 2) the accomplishment-oriented 3) the psychosomatic 4) the addicted 5) the secretly mean and 8) the emotionally needy.
We are given innumerable case histories/examples of women who have suffered due to narcissistic mothers, so the reader gets a clear picture of the problems involved.
I didn’t get through the whole book since I didn’t find it relevant to myself. But I can see the final chapters are devoted to advising daughters of narcissistic mothers on how to recover. I don’t know, but these chapters may well prove helpful for the women under discussion.